Im soon 20 and never had a job, is that bad?

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Fos11
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08 Jan 2019, 2:08 pm

Im a school dropout and i never had a real job. And i will turn this year 20. My questin is, how bad is that? Am i a lost case? Or is this normal if you are autistic? Because it seems many here are way older than 20 and never had a job. Not even part-time. So is it pointless to search for jobs if youre an autistic dropout? Is it generally pointless to look for jobs if you have autism?



TUF
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08 Jan 2019, 2:26 pm

I had a job when I was 26, after a similar situation except I went to uni etc and did voluntary work. And I had a very brief stint of about three nights/days (separate of course) as a baby sitter when I was a teenager.

Why not try to do some voluntary work so you can build up a CV, or go on a course or something?

Depends what sort of job you want and how autistic you are and in which areas.

Autistic people are more likely to be unemployed, though.



Fos11
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08 Jan 2019, 2:46 pm

Are you currently unemployed?



SarahOnTheMoon
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08 Jan 2019, 5:00 pm

I got my first job when I was 16, dont compare yourseld to when other people started working. I'm a bit of a hypocrite since all I do is compare myself to others i think society has brainwashed us into thinking if we haven't done this this and that by a certain age we're screwed which is not true



Prometheus18
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08 Jan 2019, 5:24 pm

I'm nearly 23 and have never had a job.



Fos11
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09 Jan 2019, 2:49 am

So you live off welfare?



Prometheus18
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09 Jan 2019, 3:34 am

Yes.



Fos11
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09 Jan 2019, 4:58 am

Where do you live?



hurtloam
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09 Jan 2019, 5:31 am

I've said this before, but I do recommend cleaning jobs. It gave me something to put on my CV. Gave me some extra income whilst I was living with my parents and best of all. I didn't have to deal with other people as it was early morning shop cleaning.

Edit. A CV is the British term for a resume.


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Fos11
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09 Jan 2019, 5:49 am

Do you hate being autistic too? I mean im not extreme autistic, but still.



CyclopsSummers
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09 Jan 2019, 6:06 am

I finished secondary school at 16, and didn't enroll in a follow-up school afterward. I was living with my parents while I was preparing for my exams that would have allowed me access into university, but I failed to pass those exams due to psychological stress.

Subsequently, I started searching for jobs when I was 21, and after many rejections (due to lack of education/experience) I finally found a cleaning job 2 months before my 22nd birthday. I dropped that job after only 2 weeks because I (falsely) perceived the job as being too high-pressure. A month later, I started work at a book repair shop, through a programme that caters to people who have trouble finding work in the first place (mostly because of psychological and physical disabilities). I held that function for 2 years and it eased me into what work means, but the pay was basically social welfare level and made it impossible for me to search for a house to rent on my own. At the end of the stretch, they wanted to shunt me into another such job with keeping my welfare and not properly paying a wage, and I broke free from them and found a factory job instead.

I've since mostly been active in factories/warehouses and in cleaning. If it were available to me, I'd work one or more cleaning jobs that would net me about 40 hours a week, because I find cleaning pleasant and generally speaking people are grateful and friendly toward cleaners (in my experience). But it's difficult to find enough hours to pay rent and food and stuff and leave a little something for extra things, so as of right now, warehouse work it is.


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hurtloam
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09 Jan 2019, 7:10 am

Fos11 wrote:
Do you hate being autistic too? I mean im not extreme autistic, but still.


I did when I was your age. Although, I didn't know what autism was back then. I just knew I didn't fit in.

I just struggled so much with dealing with other people.

Now that I'm older and I've had more experience I feel better about it. I understand myself better now. I understand how to deal with other people better now. I feel like I've had to learn the hard way, but at 36 my life is a lot better than it was at 19.


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MagicKnight
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09 Jan 2019, 8:44 am

Hello, Fos11. I'll approach each of your doubts separately.

Fos11 wrote:
Im a school dropout and i never had a real job. And i will turn this year 20. My questin is, how bad is that?


I am wondering what triggered such doubt in you.

Nobody here can possibly know how bad that is for you. The answer would depend on how you're dealing with that, the much you need a job and the much you care about having one - among other things.

Fos11 wrote:
Am i a lost case?


Because you don't want to have a job? Who can blame you? Only fools and horses work. Lol.

Take this into consideration: do you really feel fine about not having any autonomy over your own life, depending on the money from others to cover for your costs and needs? If you're totally cool with this, there's no problem.

Myself, I wouldn't be cool. I'd rather have a depressing job killing me slowly every day than depending on others, but that's me.

Also, there are those who blame others for their "lack of luck" - meaning, the fact that stuff don't como for free. So they blame "the system", "the society" and so on for things that were simply down to their very own choices. These are the news: one who refuses to live in the boring, painful, unbearable world of adulthood has no right to complain and blame those who are pushing the knobs to make the "system" work for everyone, including people who don't want to have a job.

Fos11 wrote:
Or is this normal if you are autistic?


If you're considered "functional", that means you're not "disabled enough".

Aspies are said to be "functional" for a reason. If you can read, write, learn, eat by yourself, provide for yourself... you'll be forced to work one way or another. Unfortunately it doesn't matter to others what's your individual perception of your own reality, meaning, even if you don't feel like you should be working there'll be social pressure to prove you the opposite.

Fos11 wrote:
Because it seems many here are way older than 20 and never had a job. Not even part-time. So is it pointless to search for jobs if youre an autistic dropout?


I don't know what are the true numbers but most aspies I came across, have jobs. On the other hand, I know "normies" who never had a job. As I stated before, being an aspie is no excuse to give up on the workforce (in the current state of things, that is). How I wish it were possible, but there's no way around it!

Fos11 wrote:
Is it generally pointless to look for jobs if you have autism?


No. I knew people who behaved and looked way worse than me, I mean in an autistic context, yet they had jobs and some even were very respected professionals.

I for one have a very good job and I'm considered by peers to be a very successful person (while I dont feel like that myself but that's beside the point).

Now, does this mean that *you* definitely should have a job? No!

First and foremost if you *need* a job, go ahead and find yourself one immediately. If you think you don't need a job, think about your future: who will provide for you?

If you're not worried with any of these things, then you don't need a job. One thing prevails though: you're responsible for your own life. Nobody else on Earth has anything to do with that, not even your parents. Your life: your choices, your responsibility.



Fos11
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09 Jan 2019, 11:06 am

I think i deserve to die, because im just a burden on others and will always be. Thats why i want to ije too. Whats the purpose of live if youre a basement dweller?



aspieprincess123
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09 Jan 2019, 11:16 am

I struggled for years in both a entry level job where I was greeting people at the door I wasn't even trusted to operate a till.

What pushed me to get to where I was was my partner though we were friends at the time who said if I want to improve myself I need to make it happen.



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