What do you think about corporal punishment of disobedient.?

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In my opinion corporal punishment should be?
Poll runs till 20 Nov 2019, 1:07 am
It's wrong and should be completely banned 53%  53%  [ 8 ]
It's Should be legit, some kids need it 20%  20%  [ 3 ]
It's should be legal, but only in rare situation 27%  27%  [ 4 ]
Total votes : 15

DW_a_mom
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28 May 2019, 12:15 am

Corporal punishment is lazy. It skips understanding why the child is being disobedient and figuring out what the core lesson the child needs to learn actually is. You can find millions of advocates for it, its as old as time, and some people want to blame all of societies ills on the lack of it, but studies have consistently shown that children who are subjected to corporal punishment are more likely to engage in criminal and other problematic behaviors as adults.

Simply put, it does not actually work better than the alternatives, despite all the advocates who believe it does.


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magz
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28 May 2019, 2:10 am

I suppose most of the corporal punishment advocates imagine just two alternatives: spanking or doing nothing.
Of course doing nothing would lead to disastrous outcomes.
What they miss is, there is a lot of other options.


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Twilightprincess
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28 May 2019, 6:59 am

DW_a_mom wrote:
Corporal punishment is lazy. It skips understanding why the child is being disobedient and figuring out what the core lesson the child needs to learn actually is. You can find millions of advocates for it, its as old as time, and some people want to blame all of societies ills on the lack of it, but studies have consistently shown that children who are subjected to corporal punishment are more likely to engage in criminal and other problematic behaviors as adults.

Simply put, it does not actually work better than the alternatives, despite all the advocates who believe it does.


I like that you mention that it’s “lazy.” That’s what I’ve often thought about it. Instead of just hitting one’s kids, one should expend some effort in thinking of a better solution



shortfatbalduglyman
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08 Jun 2019, 9:27 pm

proponents point out, it works. "Reality",

Opponents, entitled lil dipshits


Corporal punishment is not magic (good) or tabboo (bad)


There are many things wrong with corporal punishment


But there's something wrong with everything



:mrgreen:



inkgirl
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09 Jul 2019, 7:49 pm

I think that corporal punishment is fine, as long as the parent is not abusing their child (of course, when a spanking crosses the line into abuse is up to debate). I was spanked as a child, and it worked. It was an effective way to keep me in line and to teach me a lesson. I was only spanked on the rare occasion, if I was in a lot of trouble. As I got older, my dad moved away from spankings, and gave me and my siblings calisthenics instead. As in, "drop down and give me 20".



IstominFan
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11 Jul 2019, 9:43 am

It is lazy, and also reactive, not proactive.

Discipline involves setting a good example first.

I could think of other things that are worse than a quick swat on the bottom, however: name-calling, gaslighting and the use of Ritalin to "calm someone down." Doing nothing is bad as well, because it increases rebellion in the bad kids and causes "learned helplessness" in the good ones who are struggling.



magz
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11 Jul 2019, 9:55 am

IstominFan wrote:
I could think of other things that are worse than a quick swat on the bottom, however: name-calling, gaslighting and the use of Ritalin to "calm someone down."
Totally agree. The moderate spanking I received did not make much difference (except for spanking for lying - I learned to lie better). The pattern of denial, guilt-tripping, double binds and gaslighting left scars that haven't healed to this day.
IstominFan wrote:
Doing nothing is bad as well, because it increases rebellion in the bad kids and causes "learned helplessness" in the good ones who are struggling.
I see a lot of a problem in "no punishments means doing nothing" mentality, both in practicioners and critics of this approach.
Typically, saying and showing what the parent approves and disaproves can be enough for the child to learn over time. When it shows not to be enough, I see problematic behaviors of my children as problems that need to be understood and solved. So I try to understand and find solutions.


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BenderRodriguez
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11 Jul 2019, 9:58 am

magz wrote:
I suppose most of the corporal punishment advocates imagine just two alternatives: spanking or doing nothing.
Of course doing nothing would lead to disastrous outcomes.
What they miss is, there is a lot of other options.


This is one of the many issues that a lot of people treat as if there's nothing between the two extremes - it leads to polarizing "you're either with us or against us" attitudes and is the main reason it's so difficult to have a civilised discussion about them.


IstominFan wrote:

Discipline involves setting a good example first.


This a hundred times. You can tell a child not to do something until you're blue in the face: if they see you doing it, they'll do it too :twisted:


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shortfatbalduglyman
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11 Jul 2019, 3:39 pm

An article claimed that a man told his daughter he was going to strike her

She told him it's illegal and she was calling 911

He said go ahead

She called and 911 came and supervised


So


Yes "spanking" is wrong but






There is something wrong with everything





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League_Girl
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13 Jul 2019, 9:58 pm

People just find other ways than spanking. Like they will use shame by making them stand outside and hold up a sign, parents are now destroying their kids property and putting it online. I have heard of other extremes like removing the bedroom door from their room, I knew one parent who locked their son out of the house for the weekend as a punishment and that kid was 13. He stayed at a friend's house instead for a week. My mom thinks all this is wrong but is fine with a spanking.


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