Dad's Intuition, does it exist? Noonelse thinks so! HELP!

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Hi all, I'm new here, and not even sure if I belong. My head is kind of a mess, so please pardon anything I say wrong. I know Autism is a touchy subject, especially with parents. I am not sure if I belong here, this is why I need some help from you as a commnity. This will probably be to long winded for most, for that I'm sorry.
Here goes: My daughter is quickly approaching 3 years old and some of the things she does has me worried. Unfortunately the information on the internet has not made me feel any more secure. The first sign of a problem occured around the 1 1/2 year area. She was eating something (sorry don't remember what it was) and all of a sudden my wife and I noticed her tense her jaw and start to quiver. The episode lasted approx 5-10 seconds and then stopped. She seemed fine immediately after, not dazed or anything. These episode continued for a couple of weeks (always triggered by food) and then stopped for around a year. At 2 1/2 they started again. This time the onset was either food, or a stressful situation when she was told not to do something, she would freeze and shake for a few seconds. I started googling facial grimacing, and I'm sure you all know where that took me. The syptoms she exhibits are as follows toe walking (getting less as of late), picky eater (nuggets, pizza, french toast, pancakes, ice cream, popsicles, mac and cheese, pasta) the thought of her even trying a new food will send her to tears, attitude (depends on what time of day it is), repetative movements (sometimes a clearing of the throat, sometimes index finger to thumb). T oanyone reading this who thinks I'm picking her apart, I do not mean to I'm just really scared for her sake, so I pay attention to everything she does. The positives; communication skills are that of a 4 year old (said an 11 word sentence that actually made sense shortly after her second birthday), the most vivid imagination I've ever seen from a child (she has befriend Milli from Team umizoomi, kids pirates, bubble guppies, and her new best friend is Lucy from Charlie Brown) we have to walk to her house every night, she know and identifies all her shapes, colors, letters and numbers (most of the time). knows how to rhyme, can be overly loving (no such thing) and thankful for things, recognizes when someone is upset and shows compassion. I'm sure there are more positives, but these are the main things.
So is it normal when she starts thanking me for a playroom I made for her months ago, out of the blue? Is it normal when ever she gets a new nail polish color, I hear ("It's my favorite") like every other color. Is it normal that she can not follow direction when she tries to drive her power wheels (hasn't got the steering down yet), or can't figure out how to pedal her tricycle yet? Is it normal that cookie monsters eyes, along with other characters petrify her?
I'm really lost, and I just need someone to explain what the real signs to watch out for our. When I spoke to the pediatrician about this a couple months ago, they dismissed it without even seeing her. My wife, parents, friends, all think she is fine, but how do they know? So does any of this make sense to anyone. For those who took the time to read this long winded tale, I thank you for your time, and appreciate any insight anyone has.

Hi, JsDad - any parent with questions and an open mind belongs! Welcome!

First of all - don't panic. I don't think anyone can say for certain whether autism is an issue one way or the other on an internet forum - but I think most of us whose kids are diagnosed have discovered it isn't quite what we thought it was at first.

Second, I, along with many other posters here, am a big believer in parent's intuition. Diagnosis is happening earlier and earlier these days - in most places (and in all of the US) your local public school district will probably offer an assessment free of charge; I'd also mention your concerns at her next pediatric visit. If you want to pursue diagnosis further, typically the test for an autism spectrum disorder is done by a developmental/behavioral pediatrician, a pediatric neurologist, or a developmental psychologist (an MCHAT or an ADOS.) My personal recommendation: find out what your insurance covers and start there.

Most of the things you list seem like sensory issues to me, which are just now being recognized as one symptom of an autism spectrum disorder, but can be something your child can get intervention for all by itself. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sensory_pr ... g_disorder

Today, PBS Kids put out this excellent overview of autism spectrum disorders for Autism Awareness Month http://www.pbs.org/parents/inclusivecom ... utism.html (Or you can try here - even if you haven't received a diagnosis, it's a good place to start: http://www.autismspeaks.org/family-serv ... 00-day-kit) Both places have an overview of the diagnostic criterion in somewhat plainer language than the DSM-IV. In general, autism spectrum disorders relate to difficulties in social interaction, problems with verbal and nonverbal communication and repetitive behaviors - and, in the new DSM Hyper-or hypo-reactivity to sensory input or unusual interest in sensory aspects of environment.

Keep in mind - sometimes parents are aware long before the symptoms are disruptive enough to warrant a diagnosis and referral for services. This isn't something to worry about, it means your child's needs are being met for the time being especially if your child is able to communicate via speech. It's also important to remember that sometimes little "glitches" are a part of normal childhood development - so sometimes doctors take a "wait and see" approach.

If this happens, no worries, but keep an eye out for changes - if something doesn't seem "right" you can ask for more support. There are a bunch of stickied threads at the top of this forum with a lot of resources that may help you.

Picky eating seems more common among young children than not. That is why there are "kid" foods like macaroni and cheese, and chicken nuggets.

I definitely believe in Dad's intuition. Of course you can't know for sure (and nor can anyone else) if your daughter is on the Autism Spectrum unless she is tested by a professional. I think it is great that you are so attuned to her development, and I applaud you for reaching out here. If she does get diagnosed, she will have a great support system in you, since you are clearly a devoted father

A lot of the things you describe of your daughter are echoed in my own daughter.... although my DD is 7 years old, diagnosed PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified), ADHD and MMR (Mild Mental Retardation). Your 3 year old daughter says things like every nail polish color is her favorite, and so that fits for my DD to be saying that now, since she is at about that level developmentally. My DD would't have been able to express herself in that way at 3 years old. She didn't have the vocabulary for it at that age, and was not very interactive in her communication.

I'd say keep an eye on her. If you want to get her tested, speak to her doctor about it. The earlier it is caught, the better off she will be. And if she doesn't test for an ASD, then you can sleep easier.

Many blessings to you.

From one dad to another:

1. Don't freak out.
2. Practice relaxation techniques.
3. Trust your intuition.
4. Keep a journal.
5. Continually educate yourself.
6. Consider medical doctors as consultants...ask them a lot of questions then make your own decisions. You know your child better than any doctor.
7. If you don't agree with a doctor, get a second opinion.
8. If you don't agree with the second opinion, get a third. Etc.
9. Spend as much quality time with your child(ren) as possible.
10. Be in it for the long-haul...take the long term approach.

I could go on, but these are some of the things I wish someone had told me. Best of luck

I just wanted to point out that not all autistic children have meltdowns that last 20 minutes or more...some of them are very quite, my now 19 year old didnt start having long screaming meltdowns until she was about 16. My kids have meltdowns but most of them are short as my husband and I know what works with my son and my daughter. I had far worse problems with my first three....so maybe its because I know how to talk to or to handle them but its not a really a diagnostic criteria.

I'd like to start by saying thank you to everyone here who responded, and even those who took the time to read my concerns without responding. I feel a bit more at peace, yet a bit more confused at the same time. Being the fact that I'm unsure if she has a form of autism or sensory processing disorder, or is she just being an almost 3 year old with a few extras.

I think the early treatment is critical when there is a language delay - getting ahead on speech can be difficult if you wait until they are school-age to do so. It certainly doesn't hurt in other situations, either - but I think (and I'm no doctor, this is just my opinion) for the other things, the timing is not as critical.

Wait and see can be a legitimate way to go if none of the symptoms you're observing seem to be causing undue distress either to her or to your family. Many kids (as described by posters here) on the "high-functioning" side of the spectrum either escaped detection entirely until they were older, or were re-evaluated several times as they developed - we'd looked for help for my son (not knowing about autism at all) since he was 3, but he wasn't diagnosed until 10, as typically developing kids have a jump in language development around 8 or 9 years old. He probably would have benefited from treatment as early as kindergarten, but I don't think intervention in preschool would have helped much.

Keep in mind that every child on the spectrum is different. We didn't think my son had Asperger's because he'd go for months without a meltdown (I assumed it meant a certain level of stress all the time) and despite certain OCD-type traits, he's never been a lining-things-up kind of guy, and has always preferred imaginative play (albeit somewhat rigid imaginative play.)

Either way, bring up your concerns to your pediatrician at her next visit, they are supposed to be trained to look for signs of "classic" autism and will refer you if it is, indeed, something that needs immediate attention.

My son also had great imaginative play, he could turn a straw into a telephone, toothbrush, hammer, etc..he also had imaginary freinds. He also learned phrases from TV shows and used them APPROPRIATELY in conversation.

He has Aspergers. When he was 3 it wasnt apparent. But that is typical for Aspergers, usualy they dont get diagnosed until elem school!

hang in there Sounds like your little girl is a delight!

You've got a lot of time. Every kid is unique and what matters most is that they have attentive and loving parents. Sounds to me like your kid does.

Really, IMO, the diagnosis is only important if there arise significant shortcomings at school, and that's like I say, you have a lot of time. Otherwise, engage with your child where she is at and parent in an empowering and validating way, just like with any kid.

Best of luck and enjoy the ride!