loud, Loud, LOUD!! !

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I struggle painfully with noises most people don't notice. A constant source of patience testing is my four year old daughter. She cannot moderate her volume without constant direction (and even then it's a struggle) and she is constantly making noises. Screaming, screeching, yelling and just being loud are commonplace. When she plays with her toys, there is always squealing. These aren't verbal tics, it's normal speaking, just loud, shrill and extremely frequent. We're always telling her to be quiet and calm down. She almost never stops talking, which people comment on all the time as if we hadn't noticed. The complete lack of any quiet time in the house is difficult with my sensory problems.

I know that moderating this is part of a social network of things neurotypical children just pick up, and that these things can be difficult for autistic children. Does anyone have any suggestions?

sounds like a typical little girl. If you find the answer, let me know; have a granddaughter that does the same thing. Sometimes you can run some alternative noisemaker, like the radio, TV, etc. Or get some of those noise-canceling headphones. Just a thought.

a constant reminder to use her "inside voice"... and a set of earplugs for you. you'd be surprised at how well they work.

Could you make 'quiet areas' and 'loud areas' of your house? Use visuals for loud and quiet and have them in those areas.
My boy can be like that and he will go to his room or outside (when asked/told) when I can't take anymore. I have a high tolerance for alot of his behaviours but one can only tak so much.

Ear plugs and headphones!

Helen

I talk my kids that "Mum's having a break" which gives me 5 minutes alone in the kitchen. I tell them to go away if they come in before the 5 minutes are up
Does she go to kindergarten? A welcome break, sometimes.

Thanks everyone. I do have an iPod, which is helpful at times, but sometimes I need quiet. I like the suggestion about visual cues for quiet areas, I'll have to give that a try. Maybe blue areas could be quiet and red could be loud, and I'm thinking of little laminated construction paper signs we could use.

I've been wanting to get some of those giant pillows to make a quiet place in our living room, someplace to read, to go when overwhelmed, etc.

If she doesn't realize she's being loud, a reminder to be quiet might not have any efffect at all.

What your describing sounds a lot like me when I was little. I loved talking, but just about whenever I started i'd get yelled at for talking to loud. Maybe after about a year of that, I decided to not talk unless spoken too. That made me really angry. I wanted to talk, but i'd say maybe three words and get yelled at, so i had to not talk at all.

Even in my mid-20's have trouble with volume. For example when I was student teaching, I used a much louder voice than normal in the classroom. What I didn't realize until it was pointed out to me, was that I wasn't turning that "loud voice" off when I was outside of the classroom, speaking to a person who was standing next to me. Telling me to p ay attention and speak softer won't be of any benefit because i don't notice the volume when I'm speaking normally. I'm just speaking normally. In fact I might not even believe you when you first accuse me of speaking too loudly because I know that i'm just speaking normally. it doesn't sound the slightest bit loud inside my head

Just a thought here: have you had her hearing checked?

Yes, her hearing is normal. I've been told that children with autism can have difficulty moderating tone, pitch, volume, etc. so I figure that's why...I just don't know how to best approach handling it. As Triangular Trees noted, yeah, I suspect she doesn't realize she is being loud so that's probably why reminders don't work. I don't want her to feel the way you did, that just makes me sad to even think of. In fact, that's part of what troubles me. I want less "loud", but I don't want to break her spirit in the process by constantly telling her to be quiet.

If it's any consolation, my son is quite similar but is improving with age (currently almost 8 yrs old). We used to always be asking him to quieten down, but now we have periods of days/weeks (ok, sometimes hours!) where he is usually settled, but then gets louder when stressed or tired (eg. end of school term). I am convinced his loudness is often his way of stimming.

I don't have any answers for you, all I can say is I wish I had your problems, my 4 year old son does not really speak spontaneously and I would do anything to just have him talk!! I hope you find peace in your home, I have also heard this is a form of stimming.