How do you handle multiplayer gaming?

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My (neurotypical) best friend is obsessed with multiplayer games like LoL, Dota, etc. I've watched him play and the gameplay looks cool, but I am really anxious to try because from what he tells me, cooperating with other people on a team is a big part of it and you have to talk over mic to them a lot and plan strategies. Also apparently they are pretty relentlessly mean to if you mess up, even if you're new. How do other aspies who like multiplayer games handle this?

I play WoW and pretty much everyone is rude no matter what you do.

I have yet to play any such games online, except for this one time I played Disney's Virtual Toontown game, which was really cool at first but soon got repetitive and boring like most RPG's. There are too many cyberbullies and trolls who would just love to say hateful things to a female "noob". Other people may not have a problem, but I do, it's disgusting what people say online, like the short time I was on some virtual Sim-like website called HABBO or something. One time I found two male players hanging out in my room who weren't invited by me. All I said to them was "oh hi", and one of them called me a b***h before leaving. Why is it so wrong to want to play a game alone and do things my way at my own pace, instead of following a bunch of players I don't even know around like a mindless sheep?

The technical part of multiplayer games is easier to manage for me. So get the knowledge about how the game system is running and functioning and so on i am even quiet well.

When it comes to games where fast reactions are needed i usually play supporters. I need more time until physical reactions are instinctive to me, so I get better and better, but usually my friends are way ahead of me. So when playing Shooters i prefer games that focus on tactic and teamplay (Example: Bad Company) much more then just fast reaction. (Many maps of Call of Duty) So while my friends focus on the direct combat of players in midrange i normally secure our back, am responsible of fighting vehicles and aircrafts or spawn if needed with new ammunition or medpacs and so on, or to abuse the visor zoom of the RPG to spot enemies if we have no sniper. Because i am so lousy in the typical midrange combat and focus on mechanical crafts and support, i also are able to carry a specialesed close range weapon most of the time, instead of the typical assault rifles, so if we get ambushed in close combat we have an advantage. (Even I manage to hit an enemy with a pumpgun on 3 meter distance. ^^)

When playing the same game long enough i even get quiet well, still other players with my playtime are topexperts until then.

My friends "tolerate" my lack of physical skill as long as i accept it by myself. Which means chosing the role that fits best to my skills and accepting that in many situations instead of trying to center the action on me, i support the one who fits best to be the center of action in the best way possible.


I also like to play MMORPG´s which was really great in the first years around 2004 but get more and more worse for me with the quality of Teamspeak and other live chat programs. So in earlier times you only used teamspeak if you were entering hard game content, so you talk about which tactics you want to trie and so on. When it came to killing big bosses, there was a strict hierarchy who was allowed to talk, before and during a fight. So in the pauses between the main fights you knew that there was only gossip and you did not have to listen to it, and when it came to important stuff the gossip stopped, only one person talked, if you had question you had to use the written chat until the raidleader told you, that you should talk about it.

And for the rest of the game most people used the written chat, giving me the possibility to have contact with others on the same level, where i am not handicapped.

In the last years now its more and more common to be in the voicechat with your guildmates, whenever you are on. This is a big problem for me because its even hard for me in real life when more than one person is talking. So instead there are 8 people talking, and in a lousy speech quality via the live chat program, so i have to chose if i want to focus on the talking or on the game, but i cant do both. Even if i choose to ignore the talking, after 1-2 hours i am completely tired and down and weird and so on because of the noises in the chat.

If you decide to go online in the game, but not entering Teamspeak, people talk about you, that you dont wanna play with them, because they cannot ask you if you want to play with them if you are not in the teamspeak and the alternative of using the text chat is so awkward for them. So a player of my guilt really shouted at me angrily because he was "forced" to use the keyboard to contact me.

Because of this, i started to enter teamsepak, when playing games, but instead of joining the gathering channel i choose an empty channel. I thought that in this way, people are not forced to use the keyboard to communicate with me, because if they want to ask me something they can enter my channel, and if not i dont hear all the noises because noone else is there. But it didnt help anything because other players moved me by force in the chat active channel "So we can have more fun." or when they were bored they joined my channel to chat with me. Which i wanted to avoid.

The other side is: In earlier times this games really helped me having contact with others. So what i am not able to do in real life, have contact with other persons, loughing with them, making jokes, having fun and so on, was possible for me in this games as long as all of these communications were happening in the text chat. Now all of this having fun as guild mates is happening in the voice chat. So nobody is making fun in the text chat anymore and so on. Since the last 2 years the greater guilds write "Teamspeak activity" even in their requirements profile if you want to join them.

And because all are getting used to chatting all day, even when playing operations there is more and more voice chatting. Which is a real problem for me, because if i listen to all the chatting i am not able to play full concentrated and get tired and stressed after an hour. When not listening i miss the relevant information about the game, which they hide between their chatting.

So technically i am a good player at MMORPGs because they are less about speed and more about knowing game mechanics and tactics, where i am pretty well. So i own the title of the maintank (which is a pretty responsible game role) in our guild because i do my job very good most of the time, still i got the inofficial title "Noob of the week" every week, because doing something completely stupid caused to my inability to concentrate on game and chat at the same time.

I choosed then to tell raidleaders and guild officers that i would have problems with "selective hearing", which makes it hard to me to understand the talking in the teamspeak, so if there is more then 5 minutes chatting in the teamspeak i normally stop listen to it, because its too enduring for me. So they know, that if they want to tell something game relevant in between, they have to draw my attention and instead of talking "flower sentences" just give me military precise commands. As example: "....chitchatchitchatchitchatchitchatgossipchitchat SCHNEEKUGEL!! ! Take the ranges! .... chitchatchitchatchitchat..."

So it seems uncommon to them and they cannot understand, that i am not able to listen about hours to other persons, because they cannot understand how you can hear noises but need to concentrate to makes word from it and when foreign players are with us its seems pretty rude to them, when our raidleader is yelling short military commands at me, but it really works out for me. And on the other hand, simply "hearing problems" are not so discriminated as mind inabilities. They even accept now, that i want to be left in my empty channel in the voice chat, if its no about something important.

So i really want to avoid of ever telling someone in the game, that i have a mental disease, because sooner or later i fear everyone would know, and whenever somethings goes wrong you are the ret*d bastard responsible for it. Being known as weird but competent, with a major hearing disease is ok for me.

Used to play resistance 2 with a Buddy, talking constantly and pretty much fighting on our own team. We could fend off most teams with 2 twas ace. But with random people I just end up being rude, quiet or just talk to myself. Or in free for all will mess with people and muck about. People can be very very rude, but some are nice. Haven't played wow or lol but i'm guessing people are rude there if you mess up. Cod is always rude. Quake and unreal depends how good they think they are lol. Good luck

Badly. Very, very badly.

I can play pretty well when I solo, so I play a class that's good for that sort of thing, like a rogue in Wow. I do very badly in instances and dungeons with a group, so I often end up leveling my character till I can solo it. My first experience in a dungeon was awful. Everybody was rude, nothing was organized, no one [including yours truly]knew what to do and everyone got yelled at.

I'm very bad at hot keys and maneuvering in fights with player vs. player too so I avoid those. I get killed almost every time because the opponent is all over the place ganking me and I'm just spinning around in circles because I often get attacked so suddenly I don't know what class I'm being attacked by and don't know what moves to use to defend myself. When I do pvp, I use the typical rogue tactics and fight and kill like a low-down weasel. Probably how it would be for me in real life in a post apocalyptic world. Bah! Who am I kidding? I'd get ganked at the outset because I'm too peaceable and not very street smart or cunning.

I don't like multiplayer and avoid it whenever possible. I'm just lucky that in Runescape you can do almost everything solo.

I don't have voice chat and won't use it.

My mic for xbox has a mute button and a volume control, so i usally just turn both off so the language doesn't come through the tv and so i can switch if a friend joins. No matter, if i would to change to Playstation or PC i would still use this as i tend to go lone wolf online. Unless a friend joins, then i will usally talk to them only.

Some people on COD need to learn swearing will not change the fact they are a geek, not a 'hardman'. I have already appcepted that fact.

Exactly why i quit!

I was in this cool guild but one day we did a raid on Baradin Hold for some transmog and i was one of the tanks. Now my guild uses Vent for chat and if your raiding you HAVE to be on Vent or something like it. Now i have a high voice and the guild leader knew my age. After the failed run some idiot called me a "irresponsible ret*d 2 year old kid" and kicked me from the guild and also kicked my alts (that he knew about anyways. i still have some spy's in there ) Anyway i was on my "spy" and was chatting when the guy who kicked me came on. I told him HEY ITS ME (name)! he then kicked me and ignored me. So yeah the guilds name was Chaotic Nightfall and i reccomend if your 12- you DO NOT play. Now i'm not telling you how old i am but the leader was 13 and he was skilled. I however was not so i was kicked. BUT I HAD CRAP GEAR AND WAS TRYING TO GET MOAR D:

I played WoW, DCUO, SWTOR and GW2. Out of the 4, I have encountered the lease amount of "elitists" in GW2; mostly because they all rage quit because the game is not WoW (or because of Ascension gear). I wouldn't recommend going to WoW; players will blame you even if it's not your fault. The majority of my unpleasant online interactions were on WoW. I didn't interact with anyone in SWTOR and DCUO. My GW2 guild is full of nice people and I play mostly with my brother and his 3 colleagues.

I rarely talk to anyone outside of my guild. I usually try to ignore other people but I think one should respond if they whisper you. Many people in the MMO community think they now the best way to play even when they barely know how to play in the first place. If someone gets to aggressive, you usually have an ignore function and if that doesn't make them leave you alone, you can report them. Don't give into taunts because you might say something that they can report you for in retaliation. People will sometimes taunt you in player vs player games; just don't let them get to you because they want you to get mad and make mistakes.

Multiplayer gameing? it's easy, just focus your attack on the Noobs!

No, but to be serious, I'm more of a relaxed, easy mode kind of gamer, I'm rather play offline than online.
but when I go online, I try to figure out who is the worst gamer in the session, usually the one who seems to be oblivious the battle around him. then I have a chance to rack up some kills. but you've got to watch out for the really serious gamers...

As for World of Warcraft, it sickens me because it pretty much single handedly killed off the REAL WARCRAFT and STARCRAFT ! !! !

I only communicate with a small group of friends. Other than that, I mute my mic and just listen to the other players. My social anxiety seems to carry over to talking with strangers online. I've found that I can easily be a good teammate even without communicating. The key is to listening. I listen to what others are saying. It doesn't matter that I'm not talking. I still have a good understanding of the environment and what is going on.

Only mmorpg. I do not touch shooters and competitive action games.

Most mmorpgs can be played solo nowadays. I just dip in (usually on a roleplay server), turn off any channels I don't want to read and ignore anyone I don't want to interact with, which is everyone besides the few people I already know and have gamed with for a while. Playing Secret World now and it's been just fine so far.

I demand that everyone let me win.

The few times I have played multiplayer I knew the person from real life. Seeing that I work full time, I am also looking for games that don't have extremely steep learning curves, and from what people have told me about MMO games like World of Warcraft, it takes until you get to level 90 (or whatever the top level is nowadays) until you have "learned" the game.

I did play the co-op campaign of Portal 2 and that is fantastic. But then as aforementioned, not only did I play with real-life friends, but we played in the same room, for the most part.

I remember probably 12+ years ago when I played Ultima Online.

Unlike World of Warcraft or most modern MMO's, UO was very nonlinear and undirected. It was a world that lots of people played in, rather than being a game that lots of people played together.

The distinction is important, because players in UO really enjoyed helping newbies out and showing them around and inviting them to battles and stuff. At least, in the non-PVP areas. Since there was no particular "goal" people were working toward, there was no real reason not to put aside your current activity and take some time to wander around with new players. Very high level players didn't suffer any penalty for hanging out with very low level players.

Ever since then, every MMO I've tried has been a disappointment, because players were so busy running down the narrow little path the game laid out for them that they viewed newbies as a burden. People in WOW are so busy grinding, and they're so geographically isolated by level, that new players never really encounter high level players, and the two are damned near punished for even trying to hang out together. It's really very strange to me.

I suggest that if you do decide to dabble in online play, that you specifically look for servers or guilds or players or whatever that are oriented toward helping newbies. I know many MMO's have newbie-friendly guilds, and games like Battlefield 3 and others usually have dedicated servers specifically targeted at newer players.

Remember that while some gameplay elements can make some games attract more... pissy... players, at the end of the day every single game has both good players and bad players. It's only a question of ratio. So pick a game you're interested in and then look for the good players to play it with.

If you settle on BF3 or anything else I play, let me know and I'll help you out. Some of us still enjoy helping more than grinding.