Page 1 of 2 [ 17 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

pree10shun
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 May 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,659
Location: Everywhere

12 Jun 2011, 5:34 pm

personally, my inner conscience or maybe it's the OCD that stops me from lying I don't know. I feel horrible like I have twisted the facts and that's just wrong if lie. Situations where I hide the lie to avoiding hurting someone make me almost feel like killing myself :P

On the other hand I don't think anything good comes out of lying...I find it is very easy for me to manipulate truth but I don't. Someone people say that the subsequent lying to avoid the truth about inital lie from coming to light is a big hassle.

I've never understood people who lie why do people who lie... lie?



I can't even lie to avoid something unpleasant like embarrassment or physical pain(my worst fear and the only reason I am scared of death :P... This my mom realized when I was young and thought would be a good idea to physically hurt me by beating me up using a belt so I would use my brain to learn math that I was very poor at... I had no choice so I learnt what I could).



Sand
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2007
Age: 95
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,484
Location: Finland

12 Jun 2011, 7:28 pm

Primarily, telling the truth is not only not easy, it is frequently not possible. What you think is the truth is another matter entirely. Great minds have sometimes spent their entire lives unsuccessfully trying to tell the truth.

Lying is a great tool if you can master the proper techniques, but few do.



Philologos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jan 2010
Age: 78
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,987

12 Jun 2011, 7:37 pm

I have never in my life uttered the smallest fib:

till now

Hyuck hyuck.

I lie as little as I can manage. When I try to lie it is usually even less convincing than when I tell the truth [using the normal English understanding of the expression "tell the truth"].

I will encrypt, I will withhold. I will not lie and I will not be lied to.



HerrGrimm
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Mar 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 987
Location: United States

12 Jun 2011, 7:41 pm

I cannot lie. I am serious, my face gets all red among other tells. What I have to do is say something true during the time completely unrelated to the incident as a way to pass it off. It surprisingly works well, but maybe because I got good at it. Mostly I lie to cover my tail or someone else's. I got into so much trouble for being brutally honest; I have walked up to some higher-ups and admitted some things that really got me in hot water.

If a woman came up to me and said, "Does this dress make me look fat?" I would have to think about it, because I like large women and I do not mean to offend them. Plus, if I say no and she really is, that leads to a lot of embarrassment I think.


_________________
"You just like to go around rebuking people with your ravenous wolf face and snarling commentary." - Ragtime


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 32,152
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

12 Jun 2011, 7:45 pm

That is usually not too hard for me, but yeah I only resort to it when I have to. Like I cannot very well announce that I am a marijuana smoker during thanksgiving or christmas dinner. Otherwise half the people in the room would have heart attacks and brain hemmorages. And the only reason I feel I have to lie about that is because it helps me with my depression and anxiety so I dont need some self rightous family member to try and have an intervention.



Bloodheart
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,194
Location: Newcastle, England.

12 Jun 2011, 7:58 pm

I can't really lie.

I do however bend the truth or play with semantics;
Person #1 - 'Did you eat all the chocolate biscuits?'
Me - 'No, I didn't eat all the chocolate biscuits.' - meaning that I actually ate most of them.
This is a silly example, but you see what I mean.

The problem is that even when really trying to lie I still put too much emphasis on the words that show-up that I'm using semantics, it's obvious that I'm avoiding answering the question simply and it sounds particularly strange. I also tend to smile, blink or my tone of voice changes too. People who know me pick this up instantly, but even people who don't will spot it if they're paying attention.


_________________
Bloodheart

Good-looking girls break hearts, and goodhearted girls mend them.


Awesomelyglorious
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Dec 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,157
Location: Omnipresent

13 Jun 2011, 12:26 am

Not a natural liar. I find that when I really need to avoid a truth, and I don't have the time to think, that I will lie. Otherwise, I will just stall, avoid, and so on and so forth to avoid the lie. I am a liar when it comes to humor with strangers though. Whenever I tell something about myself to strangers, it will be a joking lie. I will say anything about myself to a stranger so long as it is chatty and amusing(to me at least), and it is natural for me then. I think because I don't see it as a lie then. I am too blunt to enjoy ACTUAL lies. Heck, I don't normally white lie.



VIDEODROME
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Nov 2008
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,691

13 Jun 2011, 12:33 am

The worst thing I do is say I agree with somebody when I really don't. Sometimes when I'm told something from a boss. Or sometimes if the topic is a sensitive issue and I think showing dissent views will get me lectured to.



pree10shun
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 May 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,659
Location: Everywhere

13 Jun 2011, 1:45 pm

Sand wrote:
Primarily, telling the truth is not only not easy, it is frequently not possible. What you think is the truth is another matter entirely. Great minds have sometimes spent their entire lives unsuccessfully trying to tell the truth.

Lying is a great tool if you can master the proper techniques, but few do.


And why would anyone want to live a life of lies??? To gain personal benefit? And do they carry that with them when they die? I would rather die with a clear conscience than live a life of lies.

Its just not for myself... but I think it'd make everyone's lives so much easier if there was no lying in the world



pree10shun
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 May 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,659
Location: Everywhere

13 Jun 2011, 1:53 pm

Bloodheart wrote:
I can't really lie.

I do however bend the truth or play with semantics;
Person #1 - 'Did you eat all the chocolate biscuits?'
Me - 'No, I didn't eat all the chocolate biscuits.' - meaning that I actually ate most of them.
This is a silly example, but you see what I mean.

The problem is that even when really trying to lie I still put too much emphasis on the words that show-up that I'm using semantics, it's obvious that I'm avoiding answering the question simply and it sounds particularly strange. I also tend to smile, blink or my tone of voice changes too. People who know me pick this up instantly, but even people who don't will spot it if they're paying attention.


I tried doing that for a while when my life was a mess coz I could not lie I used semantics. It was my panic attacks that made me lie so easily... I felt horrible later. I wanted to go apologize and my friend kept telling me not to be a wuss but I could not stop thinking about it so I went back and told the person I lied to them and told them the truth... I can make up lies so fast to get friends out of trouble but I'd rather not. Maybe it is the OCD



Tantricbadass
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 23 May 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 88

13 Jun 2011, 5:27 pm

I hate the fact that in this world I have to lie.I think I have to get into a zone to lie perfectly.Most people I talk to know me too well to not see my lies.I really try not to lie.It hurts my karma and it's very wrong.I kinda wanna cry now.Anyway, some people lie all the time because it's a obsession or they do it to make themselves feel better.



tomboy4good
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Apr 2008
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,379
Location: Irritating people everywhere

13 Jun 2011, 5:34 pm

I suck at lying. I've gotten to where I just don't bother. It's not worth the consequences if I am ever found out.


_________________
If I do something right, no one remembers. If I do something
wrong, no one forgets.

Aspie Score: 173/200, NT score 31/200: very likely an Aspie
5/18/11: New Aspie test: 72/72
DX: Anxiety plus ADHD/Aspergers: inconclusive


Sand
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2007
Age: 95
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,484
Location: Finland

13 Jun 2011, 5:45 pm

pree10shun wrote:
Sand wrote:
Primarily, telling the truth is not only not easy, it is frequently not possible. What you think is the truth is another matter entirely. Great minds have sometimes spent their entire lives unsuccessfully trying to tell the truth.

Lying is a great tool if you can master the proper techniques, but few do.


And why would anyone want to live a life of lies??? To gain personal benefit? And do they carry that with them when they die? I would rather die with a clear conscience than live a life of lies.

Its just not for myself... but I think it'd make everyone's lives so much easier if there was no lying in the world


Politics and the economic forces behind them are all operated through lies and if you believe otherwise you are not paying attention. Properly constructed and disbursed lies can ed to great wealth and reputation. Nobody sensible lives to die honorable and poor and miserable. All living things lie to exist. Tigers lie with their stripes to be invisible, artists lie with their paints to create marvelous illusions, actors lie cunningly to make you believe they are somebody else, politicians lie to gain office, businessmen lie to sell their products. Lying is not just one mode of life, it is most of life.



MarketAndChurch
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Apr 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,022
Location: The Peoples Republic Of Portland

13 Jun 2011, 7:06 pm

in the real world, you have to lie to survive. Like yourself, VIDEOROME, my own personal experience has been that making an NT feel comfortable about themselves is sometimes more important then being yourself or telling the truth.

my feelings on honesty from a thread in the Love / Dating forums:

Quote:
I am personally not a pro-honesty guy because I've discovered what a true purist who follows a honest life involves... you push away those who matter to you the most, and if you have AS, often hurt them in the process while not having a clue of the un-necessary hurt you have caused. A loving mother is never fully honest with their child because they know how crippling un-necessary truths are to them trying new things - and there are nicer slightly-less truthful ways of saying things that doesn't sacrifice what you believe in, and accomplishes the same results. Adults are the same way, which is why men share certain these things with only men and not women, and women share these things with only other women, and not men.

When you plant an idea or way of looking at something into someone's reality, you are the genesis of it. It can dwell in their subconscious long after it, and even if the relationship ends, long after you are gone. Your honesty could then go on to harbor feelings of inadequacy in your partner, like they don't meet something you want. Often, our decisions in subsequent relationships are a reaction to our former relationships, and if she leaves feeling hurt from being not attractive enough for her, she may try to change that for her second relationship, but for the wrong reason.



I also lie to shape unfavorable situations in my favor... like if someone asks if I really need the seat that next to me at the movies, and I'd prefer they not sit next to me, I'd lie to them that I'm saving it for someone else. If I spent too much time thinking logically about whether I actually need the seat next to me, it would be off-putting so I rely on my gut instinct and emotions and make a quick non-honest reply that often includes lying.


_________________
It is not up to you to finish the task, nor are you free to desist from trying.


blunnet
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Apr 2011
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,053

13 Jun 2011, 11:22 pm

MarketAndChurch wrote:
my feelings on honesty from a thread in the Love / Dating forums:

Quote:
I am personally not a pro-honesty guy because I've discovered what a true purist who follows a honest life involves... you push away those who matter to you the most, and if you have AS, often hurt them in the process while not having a clue of the un-necessary hurt you have caused.

Being brutally honest doesn't mean being truthful or always saying the truth, given that "truth" is, usually, in the eye of the beholder, it's funny when some people don't seem to know the difference between lies, mistakes, beliefs and truth.

As for dating, given the love/dating forum, relationships are built upon falshoods anyway.



VIDEODROME
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Nov 2008
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,691

14 Jun 2011, 12:28 am

Lol this reminds me of a time I visited my brother and he took me to one of his local favorite restaurants. He had me try a particular burger with the Au Jus dipping bowl he thought was awesome.

The waitress asked me how I liked it and I said it was okay. Kind of comparing it to some other burger joints I've been to. I did not know the waitress just cooked this burger in the back and my brother said I was an as*hole for insulting the cook.