My own personal goddess.

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I've pieced together my own goddess through female figures that show up in dreams that I've been communing with. Her face has appeared to me in the blackness of the night sky, she has a manifestation as a whore as well as a virgin, she has 5 living children and a 6th one that was murdered by vandals who she seeks to resurrect from the dead after the coming apocalypse. She at times transfigures herself in the form of a serpent, and shes a gatekeeper to greater self awareness.

Every morning I've been meditating on her, and I feel very invigorated and energized when I bring her imagery to the forefront of consciousness. Its almost like I've learned to hack my own mind through doing this.

Well, *my* personal goddess is a human being of flesh and blood.

Well, be careful with that. When you project the archetypal feminine onto another human being, it can end in disaster, since humans can't really measure up to ideals. I'm trying to cultivate the imagery of femininity, the Anima, within myself first and foremost and not depend on anyone else or anything else to realize it for me. I'm not going to rely on anyone else to work out all the personal kinks and bugs in my subconscious for me anyway.

My goddess is a whore half the time anyway, and she has a dead kid. I don't think it would be right of me to dump all this baggage on another person. I need to work it out first.

She's "my" goddess, and I'm "her" vessel, Just as a candle possesses a flame and a flame possesses a candle, me and her are one entity but separate components.

My animus is so original and nothing compares but what if someone hacks your fantasies, like an online friend imposes as your other? I'm so suspicious of things too good to be true and also be careful of what you wish for.

Is this an aspie thing or shizophrenic delusion?

A friend or anyone physical can't pose as my goddess, because my goddess is a psychical entity. Its a human thing and not schizophrenic, because I'm aware of the boundary between physicality and and psyche. I'm hacking my own brain by directly accessing my own subconscious and communicating with it. Its nothing new or profound either. Mass media and organized religion has been hacking the unconscious for decades and centuries to make people into mindless consumers and serfs. The only difference is I'm taking control over my own mind this time.

Sounds like you're entering Carl Jung country- mineing the unconscious for universal archetypes.

Exactly, and I'm discovering a lot of value in it. It might not be real in a physical sense, but saying there isn't a reality at all to subconscious content is like saying there isn't a reality to the command line that runs as a set of background processes behind a GUI on an operating system. You can do a lot through GNOME, but you can cut to the chase more by doing things straight from terminal.

Ahhh...if you say so.

I dont speak in computerese so those metaphors dont work for me.

I can't think of anything else. You get the basic idea though. Go straight to the core. Don't just scratch the surface.You can do a lot clicking around on your desktop, but sometimes you have to open command and do things more directly.

Last edited by JNathanK on 03 Nov 2012, 8:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

You must be more advanced than me, or maybe not. My animus is a shapeshifter, he changes with me.

I miss use guys. Love the logic that grounds me. :>

Well, that's the idea. It should evolve with you, but sometimes your shadow self gets stuck on stupid though from baggage, and you have to figure out a way of communicating with it to end the stagnation. You know you're more advanced than me if you have no problem with self integration. No need to rub it in yellow wallpaper.

This is my way of dealing with it. You have your way, and I have my way. I use black magic and fits of blind rage to deal with my stress, and some people use chewing gum, Tomato/Tomate. I'm just sharing this experience because there's so many atheist threads, and I want to give a different perspective of what divinity is. I was also interested in how people would respond, and its ummm...interesting. ....yup interesting