I think feminism may be turning me into an awful person.

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Mysoginist? Maybe not. Awful person? As much as I hate to admit, that may well be happening.

Honestly, I wouldn't be making this thread at all. Shouldn't be, even, but this has been going on so long, and as terribly as gender issue arguments on here go, that's nothing compared to what would happen if I raised this concern at the escapist, trust me.

And for reference, I am male. That may make my views moot, but whatever, this has to be said.

So, every time I see something about feminism, I get angry. Whether it has a point or not. I can even voice my agreement/issues half competently, but there's some raving, rabid part of my mind that is still shouting obscenities. I don't even think about it, it's the first thing that comes to my mind before any rational thoughts get a say.

I've been trying to figure it out, and I think I've cracked it; Feminism does not give a damn about my problems. In fact, most feminists I've seen deny the existence of my problems.

I mean, let's start with the problem most of us are dealing with; Autism. That's not given a say anywhere, let alone among hardcore feminists.

Unemployment; Nope, no cares given. Apparently, I have it easier than them employment wise. I'm not arguing that it isn't, because I have no proof, but I'm still unemployed and still not being given a chance.

Even issues with my own gender. I don't feel like I'm allowed to have emotional problems, because I'm a man, and we're only allowed to be happy or angry. I hate myself because, being a human being with instincts (that I hate) I want to have sex, but I'm ugly, and not charming, and I'm still a virgin so obviously I'd be terrible in bed, thus meaning that nobody wants to have it with me, thus meaning I'm a terrible person for wanting it at all.

That in itself, may be an issue, admittedly. Women intimidate me because there's a chance I may become attracted to them, and that would be terrible, because nobody would ever be attracted to me back, so I'd have to drive myself mad by trying to kill said attraction in my mind whilst praying they don't find out, because when people find out that someone likes them that they don't like back, they hate that person, and I don't want that to happen. They may well represent an emotional threat, through no fault of their own, and this may be the source of this irrational voice.

One thing I can say fairly for sure, people denying that I have problems, that I'm "privileged" does make me angry.

Any thoughts? Contrary to popular belief, I don't like being angry, especially against something that I'm not actually opposed to, so I want these thoughts to die as much as any feminist reading this does.

Feminism is a pretty broad umbrella (just like everything else usually). It highlights many issues that women deal with, but I don't see it as exclusionary. In a dark room a flashlight can only single out a small area, but we know the room is there.
You don't sound like a horrible person, and everyone deserves to be heard. I don't see how feminism ties into self esteem issues or discomfort about sexual urges. You wouldn't be Catholic, now would you?

Most of them don't like me either because while I'm a feminist, I'm also a housewife by choice. I've had my choices invalidated left and right by women telling me that because I choose not to work outside the home I am throwing away all the effort by women in the past to give me the opportunity to work. No, I'm not.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

You're not turning into an awful person. You're just insecure.

Anyway, it's not feminism's job to care about your problems. Feminism cares about problems that women face. Some people have a problem with feminism not caring about everyone, but no-one has criticises ethnic minority groups for not caring about white people. I'm white working class and my group has its own problems, but I don't expect groups representing black or Asian people to care about that.

Individual women may care about your problems as a person. If I considered you a friend, I would care - but not because I'm a feminist. You can't expect a whole social movement that is there to represent a group to which you don't belong to address your problems. No offence.

About feeling unworthy to have a girlfriend, I have the same problem. I have a boyfriend, but I've always been a bit ashamed of liking girls because I feel like they won't like me back. But being female myself, I see that situation in a different way. I can see how you've conflated your insecurity around women with feminism, but they are separate issues. When feminists criticise sexist power-structures or behaviour, they're not criticising you, even if it feels that way.

"You can't be a feminist if you believe in equality between the sexes" is a direct quote from a woman who was trying to rabble-rouse back at uni.

Another one told me that no man could ever be a true feminist unless he "... got his d*** cut off".

Still another one proclaimed that whenever a man gets a vasectomy, he is depriving a woman of her "right to choose".

Finally, several different self-proclaimed feminists have told me that each of their particular styles of feminism was the only true feminism, and that all of the others had sold out to male interests (e.g., the "Patriarchy").

Feminism as a movement is as factional as any religion.

I don't think feminism is the source of your problems regardless of the fact that it doesn't represent or care about you or issues you find relevant. Feminism is woman-centric, thus the name obviously. I wouldn't heed much attention to certain feminist theories and ideas that bother you, most people don't. Take care of yourself.