Nuclear war isn't that bad. Give it a chance.

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DarthMetaKnight
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11 Apr 2018, 10:08 am

Lately, a lot of people have been upset becasue Donald Trump might start a nuclear war with Russia. I'd rather look on the bright side. Here we go.

- Once the radiation clears up, the environement will be pristine and clean again.
- Nobody will commit adultery or have abortions anymore because everyone will be dead.
- Nobody will sin anymore because everyone will be dead.
- Nobody will commit microagressions or use offensive language anymore because everyone will be dead.
- Nobody will misgender transpeople anymore because everyone will be dead.
- The Israeli-Palestinian conflict will be over becasue everyone will be dead.
- Nobody will ever commit rape ever again because everyone will be dead.
- The government won't try to take your gun away anymore because they'll be dead.
- Minorities won't try to take your job anymore because they'll be dead.
- The sexism in the video game industry won't exist anyore become everyone will be dead.
- Global warming will end.
- Animal abuse will never happen ever again ... unless you belive that aninals can abuse one another. Most animal rights activists seem to think that only humans can be abusers though.
- There will never be communism anymore becuase everyone will be dead.
- Monsanto won't exist anymore becuse they'll be dead.
- Vaccines won't cause autism anymore because everyone will be dead.
- People won't think evil thoughts anymore because everyone will be dead.

Can't you see? All of our problems are caused by people! We could solve all of the world's problems if we just started a nuclear war and killed everybody! Don't buy into the lies of the human life industry! They only tell you that human life is valuable so that they can sell you s**t! Human beings are naturally supposed to belive that their lives have no value!


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DarthMetaKnight
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11 Apr 2018, 11:06 am

Disclaimer: This thread is satirical, but all satire has a bit of meaning in it.

I made this thread because there are many groups of people in this world who seem to think that most human beings are evil. These groups can be found on the left and the right.

American conservatives think that the vast majority of people (including most Americans) hate America. Alt-righters think that the vast majority of human beings are "degenerate" or "genetically impure". Religious nuts believe that the vast majority of human beings are evil sinners. They also believe that God's people will go to heaven in the event of a nuclear holocaust. SJWs think that nearly all people are sexist/racist/homophobic/transphobic/ableist. Vegans think that nearly all human beings are evil for consuming animal products or exploiting animal labor. Hard greens (like Pentti Linkola) think that killing people is the only way to prevent pollution.

Wouldn't it be funny if all of these misanthropic losers teamed up and started a nuclear war to kill off all of humanity?

Perhaps the human species deserves a nuclear war. No species despises itself as much as ours does. No species wages war against its own biological nature as much as ours does.


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CockneyRebel
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11 Apr 2018, 11:16 am

I choose to go the other way, so we all can live. Life is precious.


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DarthMetaKnight
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11 Apr 2018, 12:03 pm

Think that nuclear war is too extreme? Perhaps we could make all sex illegal!

That way, the "sexual degeneracy" that right-wingers hate and the "sexual objectification" that left-wingers hate will all be gone!

It will be better for everyone when animals are free, but human beings have to be as bland as oat flakes!

Other New Rules:
- Fun is banned. Nobody likes fun.
- Being unique is banned.
- Laughing is banned.
- Everything is banned. Nobody is allowed to do anything. That way, nobody gets offended or hurt feelings.
- Thinking is banned. Thinking causes rape.
- Banning things is banned.
- Not banning things is also banned.
- All food has rights. Sausage Party is like real life. Every time you eat food, it is literal genocide.
- Every sperm is sacred. Every sperm is good. Every sperm is needed, in your neighborhood.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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11 Apr 2018, 1:17 pm

Always remember the rule of thumb!


Image

Image



Sweetleaf
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11 Apr 2018, 1:23 pm

Well the best thing to do would remove ourselves without massive destruction to the entire planet and everything else that lives here. Why should all the other animals die in a nuclear holocaust?



Kraichgauer
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11 Apr 2018, 6:28 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Well the best thing to do would remove ourselves without massive destruction to the entire planet and everything else that lives here. Why should all the other animals die in a nuclear holocaust?


Sort of like what Rust Cohle suggested in True Detective? That we as a species should deny our genetic programming, cease procreation, and walk hand-in-hand into oblivion?


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Wolfram87
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12 Apr 2018, 3:12 am

I love Fallout, so let's go!


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Pepe
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12 Apr 2018, 1:42 pm

-No more left-wing radicals... :mrgreen:

-No more man's inhumanity to man...
-No more abominably torturous animal circle of life suffering...
-No more possibility of stumbling into eternal damnation due to a creator stuffing up his creation...

Life is suffering...
Non-existence equates to eternal peace...
R.I.P. life, the universe and everything...

And please...
No reset...
No reboot... 8)

<waits for the next planet-killing asteroid event>

Kraichgauer wrote:

Sort of like what Rust Cohle suggested in True Detective? That we as a species should deny our genetic programming, cease procreation, and walk hand-in-hand into oblivion?


That will never happen...
Evolution favours those who mindlessly procreate...
Emotionalism will ultimately always win over rationalism...
Love will always conquer... :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Sweetleaf wrote:
Well the best thing to do would remove ourselves without massive destruction to the entire planet and everything else that lives here. Why should all the other animals die in a nuclear holocaust?


Darwin was appalled at how brutal the life system was...
Why would you condemn innocent fauna to that suffering?
Miss-placed/ill-informed compassion, imo...

Extinction means no more suffering...
Leave the planet to flora...


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"Honesty is not a social duty, not a sacrifice for the sake of others, but the most profoundly selfish virtue man can practice: his refusal to sacrifice the reality of his own existence to the deluded consciousness of others."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8) I'm a rationalist...Deal with it...:mrgreen:


Pepe
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12 Apr 2018, 2:05 pm

DarthMetaKnight wrote:
- Every sperm is sacred. Every sperm is good. Every sperm is needed, in your neighborhood.



Every Sperm is Sacred - Monty Python's The Meaning of Life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUspLVStPbk


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I'm not here to change the world...There isn't a big enough soiled nappy bin... ;)
Autistic/scout motto: "Give me a better argument and I will listen..."
"Hate me for who I am...Not for who you think I am..."
You have been weighed...you have been measured...and you have been found wanking...:P
"Honesty is not a social duty, not a sacrifice for the sake of others, but the most profoundly selfish virtue man can practice: his refusal to sacrifice the reality of his own existence to the deluded consciousness of others."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8) I'm a rationalist...Deal with it...:mrgreen:


Sweetleaf
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12 Apr 2018, 2:05 pm

Pepe wrote:
-No more left-wing radicals... :mrgreen:

-No more man's inhumanity to man...
-No more abominably torturous animal circle of life suffering...
-No more possibility of stumbling into eternal damnation due to a creator stuffing up his creation...

Life is suffering...
Non-existence equates to eternal peace...
R.I.P. life, the universe and everything...

And please...
No reset...
No reboot... 8)

<waits for the next planet-killing asteroid event>

Kraichgauer wrote:

Sort of like what Rust Cohle suggested in True Detective? That we as a species should deny our genetic programming, cease procreation, and walk hand-in-hand into oblivion?


That will never happen...
Evolution favours those who mindlessly procreate...
Emotionalism will ultimately always win over rationalism...
Love will always conquer... :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Sweetleaf wrote:
Well the best thing to do would remove ourselves without massive destruction to the entire planet and everything else that lives here. Why should all the other animals die in a nuclear holocaust?


Darwin was appalled at how brutal the life system was...
Why would you condemn innocent fauna to that suffering?
Miss-placed/ill-informed compassion, imo...

Extinction means no more suffering...
Leave the planet to flora...


Ah, but who are we to decide the fauna and animals are suffering too such an extent they'd be better off dead? Besides removing humans might reduce some of the suffering these creatures endure we should at least give them the chance to thrive without us.



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12 Apr 2018, 2:07 pm

I'm sure there's a line in the Bible somewhere. Twits shall start a nuclear war and village dwelling social conservatives shall inherit the Earth.


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DarthMetaKnight
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12 Apr 2018, 2:24 pm

Mikah wrote:
I'm sure there's a line in the Bible somewhere. Twits shall start a nuclear war and village dwelling social conservatives shall inherit the Earth.


Nope. Back in those days, Christianity was more common in cities, whereas paganism was more common in rural areas. That's where the word "heathen" comes from. "Heath" is a type of grass.

Additionally, rednecks aren't the only people who live in rural areas nowadays. Those areas are also home to Native Americans, hippies and tree huggers.


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ASPartOfMe
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12 Apr 2018, 3:13 pm

Dr. Strangelove(Or How I Stopped Worrying And Learned To Love the Bomb) - Final scene
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gb0mxcpPOU

Tom Lehrer - We Will All Go Together When We Go
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frAEmhqdLFs


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Last edited by ASPartOfMe on 12 Apr 2018, 4:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Kraichgauer
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12 Apr 2018, 3:34 pm

Pepe wrote:
-No more left-wing radicals... :mrgreen:

-No more man's inhumanity to man...
-No more abominably torturous animal circle of life suffering...
-No more possibility of stumbling into eternal damnation due to a creator stuffing up his creation...

Life is suffering...
Non-existence equates to eternal peace...
R.I.P. life, the universe and everything...

And please...
No reset...
No reboot... 8)

<waits for the next planet-killing asteroid event>

Kraichgauer wrote:

Sort of like what Rust Cohle suggested in True Detective? That we as a species should deny our genetic programming, cease procreation, and walk hand-in-hand into oblivion?


That will never happen...
Evolution favours those who mindlessly procreate...
Emotionalism will ultimately always win over rationalism...
Love will always conquer... :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Sweetleaf wrote:
Well the best thing to do would remove ourselves without massive destruction to the entire planet and everything else that lives here. Why should all the other animals die in a nuclear holocaust?


Darwin was appalled at how brutal the life system was...
Why would you condemn innocent fauna to that suffering?
Miss-placed/ill-informed compassion, imo...

Extinction means no more suffering...
Leave the planet to flora...


No, doubtlessly it will never happen. But the character of Rust Cohle was an anti-natalist.


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