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XFilesGeek
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10 Sep 2018, 3:17 pm

Mythos wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
Spiderpig wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
She told her boyfriend to beat me up and he did but that wouldn't show
up in the statistics of violent acts committed by women because she
personally never committed a single violent act against me.


Of course not: it’ll rightly show up in the statistics of what men will do to impress a woman

I don't believe anyone is keeping statistics on violent acts done by men to impress women. I would suggest that it would instead show up in the statistics of violent acts committed by men, motives not being considered.


If women are as violent as men, why can't men convince women to commit acts of violence?
They can, couple violence has been reported before. Men are more likely to deal with it themselves though. So, women convince men to perform violent acts and men don't need to convince anybody because they already seem to have the faculties, readiness and drive to do so themselves.


Not to the same degree that women can convince men to commit acts of violence, apparently.


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Mythos
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10 Sep 2018, 9:26 pm

XFilesGeek wrote:
Mythos wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
Spiderpig wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
She told her boyfriend to beat me up and he did but that wouldn't show
up in the statistics of violent acts committed by women because she
personally never committed a single violent act against me.


Of course not: it’ll rightly show up in the statistics of what men will do to impress a woman

I don't believe anyone is keeping statistics on violent acts done by men to impress women. I would suggest that it would instead show up in the statistics of violent acts committed by men, motives not being considered.


If women are as violent as men, why can't men convince women to commit acts of violence?
They can, couple violence has been reported before. Men are more likely to deal with it themselves though. So, women convince men to perform violent acts and men don't need to convince anybody because they already seem to have the faculties, readiness and drive to do so themselves.


Not to the same degree that women can convince men to commit acts of violence, apparently.
If I had hard numbers, I'd tell you.



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11 Sep 2018, 5:13 am

Mythos wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
Mythos wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
Spiderpig wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
She told her boyfriend to beat me up and he did but that wouldn't show
up in the statistics of violent acts committed by women because she
personally never committed a single violent act against me.
Of course not: it’ll rightly show up in the statistics of what men will do to impress a woman
I don't believe anyone is keeping statistics on violent acts done by men to impress women. I would suggest that it would instead show up in the statistics of violent acts committed by men, motives not being considered.
If women are as violent as men, why can't men convince women to commit acts of violence?
They can, couple violence has been reported before. Men are more likely to deal with it themselves though. So, women convince men to perform violent acts and men don't need to convince anybody because they already seem to have the faculties, readiness and drive to do so themselves.
Not to the same degree that women can convince men to commit acts of violence, apparently.
If I had hard numbers, I'd tell you.
Numbers on crime are a tricky thing because criminals always want to keep it a secret.


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14 Sep 2018, 2:59 pm

This conversation might set people's hair on fire, maybe that's a good thing. They're talking about a documentary film that Jan (Jan-Willem Breure) made after some of his female interns had some at-length conversations with him about feminine sexuality where what he was hearing from them ran contra to what he'd heard so far and being the kind of curious guy who runs a film company he decided to delve into it.

One of the main recurring themes that he and Karen seem to be discussing is the move toward, if not in legal title, a sort of unofficially polygamous society in that on paper it's not acceptible in the eyes of the law but that the public apparatus for relationships is sharply pitched now in a Pareto direction. They talk about the sharp differences in how both genders set their bar on attractiveness, how much socioeconomic status comes in to play, and I think Jan has two deep concerns about the future a) men and women drifting apart, becoming even angrier with each other and b) the kind of violence that we've known polygamous cultures to generate getting repeated in the west.


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14 Sep 2018, 3:57 pm

Ah, so it's women's sexuality that is to blame. Of course. Next we'll be hearing about the evils of hypergamous women and casual sex and how the women's sexual revolution is actually what destroyed the western world. f*****g stupid incel ideology.

Karen Straughan is an MRA that no one but the worst anti-feminists and women-haters takes seriously. She likes to be an activist for men by calling other women c****. She was featured on the new Buzzfeed documentary program on Netflix recently (I believe the program is called "Follow This"), calling the female journalist who tried to interview her about men's rights issues a c**t on camera.

Call me not at all surprised that someone would post something by her in a thread about incel terrorism, like she is at all relevant to the discussion or to anythign else other than hating women. You keep pushing to make this thread about women, guys. It's transparent and pathetic and just what incels would do on one of their forums, with the exception of the death and rape threats against women because those are actually against the rules here.



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14 Sep 2018, 4:45 pm

I'm starting to think the problem is less women and more just shrill people who can make the corporate world, public space, and social media dance to their weaponized character flaws and castrate the power of responsible adulthood. With responsible adulthood out the way and no longer a problem the force of what our genes tell us to do can maybe run us full speed back into the jungle. No one has any right to demand something from another person's body, no sane person should deny that. They can't deny that people who get dehumanized by that process just get treated as non-human in general, without ever having to or wanting to impose themselves on anyone. Just that little, tiny, bit of self-reflection and knowing just how heartless nature is to people in various ways could otherwise help us guide civil discourse better - if a more equitable world is what people even want.

OTOH if the worst of the worst anti-feminists and woman-haters are on good speaking terms with evolutionary biologists and having cordial interviews with them where real woman-lovers aren't, I think that speaks volumes on where were at and what passes for truth, or hate for that matter, these days. Science has drifted too far from the genome, as has our formulations of objective truth, it's gotten overbearing, so we could very well be gearing up for a good proper dark age where we let religion, barbarism, mob rule, and feelings rule everything.


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14 Sep 2018, 6:19 pm

JP has become less of an evolutionary biologist than a public figure for his opinions. Also, he rubs lots of people the wrong way. /metaphor


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14 Sep 2018, 6:29 pm

Damn those shrill harpies. :lol:

Incels keep trying to push women's buttons and saying sexist things, and they keep getting sexually rejected by women for it. Poor incels just can't catch a break! The world is so cruel to sexist men, it's like totally unfair, man! :lol:

If only women would stop being so shrill, men wouldn't have to keep going on shooting sprees. When will we emotional and stupid ladies ever learn to stop pushing men to such violence for the sake of our hypergamous slu*ty natures? If I weren't so mentally limited by my lady-brain I might be able to figure out a solution to the problem of women driving men to violence. Damn you, lady-brain! :lol:



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14 Sep 2018, 10:11 pm

karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:
Ah, so it's women's sexuality that is to blame. Of course. Next we'll be hearing about the evils of hypergamous women and casual sex and how the women's sexual revolution is actually what destroyed the western world. f*****g stupid incel ideology.

Karen Straughan is an MRA that no one but the worst anti-feminists and women-haters takes seriously. She likes to be an activist for men by calling other women c****. She was featured on the new Buzzfeed documentary program on Netflix recently (I believe the program is called "Follow This"), calling the female journalist who tried to interview her about men's rights issues a c**t on camera.

She's definitely a weird character, she's not somebody I really care about. I've seen a lot of her comments on YT videos, and antifems praise her like she's a saint or something.

Call me not at all surprised that someone would post something by her in a thread about incel terrorism, like she is at all relevant to the discussion or to anythign else other than hating women. You keep pushing to make this thread about women, guys. It's transparent and pathetic and just what incels would do on one of their forums, with the exception of the death and rape threats against women because those are actually against the rules here.

I don't know when the topic of gender was raised, but when I noticed it seemed to be to lay the blame on all men. It became inverted following whatever transpired and is now a discussion of gender in general.

Personally, I find gender in this case to be irrelevant, but you yourself are not helping things if you act like all that has occurred so far has been to blame women. It started as essentially gendering mass murder as a male problem, at least from where I jumped in here.




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15 Sep 2018, 8:12 am

I think I'm at least learning one thing about some kinds of people - there's an obsession with personality and facts can't stand on their own, maybe because critical thinking is thought to be impossible? There also seems to be a thought by some people that all of reality might be here specifically here for their coddling and if ever they hear a suggested fact that they don't like its truth or falsity is proven by their emotional reaction - research being wholly irrelevant.

This is also the first time in my life that anyone has ever called me an incel, now several times. I've never thought of myself as one, can't relate to the label because it doesn't reflect my life priorities. This seems to be coming from someone with such narrow capacity for empathy that they'd project on others that if they can understand x they must be x themselves. This is also someone who can apparently read what I write just fine when they have a slam dunk cheapshot lined up but if its a good point or one they can't do that with it becomes unreadable, I've met religious cult leaders who played these kinds of games with language barriers. Its cunning manipulation pure and simple.


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15 Sep 2018, 9:14 am

The biggest problem I see, and which has given rise to this phenomenon, is with the most extreme and stubborn fringes of both feminists and incels. These people are not willing to admit certain realities about the other gender, or make changes to adapt to this reality -- even if it would better both their own current situations, and help protect the rest of society.

Two classic scenarios in particular (please note that I'm talking about the extremes here, too; for others who are frustrated by lack of success, and yet aren't constantly rage-dumping about the other gender, please refer to the final paragraph, and not the next few):

* the woman who loves to shout about her supposed 'strength' and 'independence,' and thus doesn't want to be involved with a man who might actually challenge some of her selfish whims by expressing natural and reasonable needs of his own -- she naturally remains single (usually expresses rage toward men verbally)

* the man who makes little to no attempt to make himself more attractive to women (bad hygiene, disrespectful manners, and so forth), and then wonders why he cannot get any action in the sack -- he naturally remains single (may initially just express rage verbally, but in cases of incel terrorism, the violence also becomes physical and concrete)

Both groups are extremely and unhealthily self-centered (it's all about their own desires, and not others), but a relativistic society has led us to "live and let live," and so these people's horrible views remain uncorrected, and so we're seeing an increase in their number and extreme action. They themselves are so hardened, that any efforts from other more stable people to make them see and deal with life in more productive ways, would be difficult to apply anyway, even if they were shown the objective folly of their viewpoints.

Some people sadly really seem hellbent on preserving their own bitter self-absorption and ways rather that put effort into a workable solution to their problems, and finding like-minded individuals on the Internet has only fed a tribal mindset and echo chamber that makes them think their extremist views are somehow legitimate or okay.

One other thing -- for those who have not fallen to the extreme, and yet who say, "but I've tried these things, and there just aren't any good men/women out there!" Well, keep searching and trying! (And consider being more realistic about the opposite gender; some people seem unwilling to accept even the most minor of perceived flaws in another human being, and demand either perfect Prince Charming or perfect Playboy Centerfold.) Anything worthwhile in life takes LOTS of discipline, initiative, and work. Often many, many years of it, dealing with many failures in the process. That's just life, and this principle can be applied in other areas beyond relationships. For example, autistic meltdowns have led to me losing or quitting jobs in the past. Rather than demand employment cater to my whims, I've had to learn better social skills and coping mechanisms.


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15 Sep 2018, 11:24 am

Going all the way back to the Original OP. There is no Incel Rebellion and no realistic Chance of one (the Movie 'Revenge of the Nerds' was just a Movie {Maybe} don't forget Gates and Zuckerberg); but there are Statistically Rare incidences when Misanthropic Human Beings go on Murderous Rampages; either Randomly and or with some Choice Targets. This is nothing New but as the Research Shows the Demographic of this Still Statistically Rare Crime of Violence now includes Young Men as well as Disenfranchised Mostly Middle Age White Men who have a Cocktail of Multiple Factors that Leads to Acts of Violence at core 'antithetical' to everything it means to be a 'Normal' Social Animal; to go out and attack the Rest of the Species as a way to gain an Ideology of Power and Status Before one dies as a Last Ditch Effort for a Social Role to leave a Mark on Life that someone else notices. True, the Human Species is capable of Incredible Dreams in Bringing them to Fruition as well as NightMares too, to Loosely Paraphrase Carl Sagan and the Movie 'Contact' too.

Usually, In Jordan Peterson Debates the Audience is not Shown up Close where one can actually see their Faces, And in General, Body Language too. These folks are the Stereo-type of Nerds and whether or not they are even concerned with
Women and Having Sex or not these are not Militant kInds of Dudes ready to start an actual Physical Combat of Rebellion
other than Behind Faceless Avatars on the Internet where they can feel some Sense and Feel of Status and Power by Putting other Folks Down in their Best attempt for a Jordan Peterson 'Lobster Fight' with a Keyboard; hehe.

Flesh and Blood Reality is much Different as other People are much Stronger in Real Life as 'Real Men' who have traversed through real Rites of initiation into Warrior-Hood-like Boot Camp in the Military, who also are armed and Loaded and packing Guns; yes, including real Biceps too. The Internet is a Different Place for Words can Pretend to be 'Real Men' too.

Being Socially Isolated is a lot Worse than not getting Sex as about an Eighth of the World is not allowed
to even Hold Hands with the opposite 'Gender' until they get married to the one and only Spouse Purchased
With Socio-Economic Status. Meanwhile, Men in Saudi Arabia Hold Hands and overall they are Happy until
they Get Caught In Homosexual Acts; as Yes it's more likely the Environment Will Play a Role in this when
the Opposite Sex is kept away; and according to research Domestic Sexual Abuse of Children is Statistically
Higher in the Home as Human Nature will do what Human Nature will do when Naturally Evolved Human Nature
is Oppressed and or Repressed into Deviances that Harm the Innocents in Life.

Research Shows in Primitive Cultures where the 'Work of the Night' to Produce Children as a Highest Importance
in Cultural Ways of Keeping the Tribe Populated; and the Key here is it starts in Puberty when instinct for 'that'
Arrives; yes, in this Flavor of Human Cultures there are no Words for Homosexuality or Masturbation in the Language
for it is true Humans are obviously Very Influenced by the Culture they are raised in as this Applies to how the DNA
is Unpacked and Expressed in Epigenetic ways as that applies to the Environmental Challenges at hand that in this
Case is Successful 'Working in the Night'. And while I realize some folks have problems with Metaphors and I do
give credit that most folks will get that Metaphor here, just in case someone doesn't; Work of the Night Means
Having Sex; and in this Case an Environment of Culture that is restricted to Heterosexual Sex. And to be Clear
Culture isn't Everything for there is Nature too and chances are there is some Homosexual Activity going
on somewhere in the Jungle there with or without Words for the Behavior those folks are enjoying too.

Bottom Lines here are Environment and Positive or Negative Impacts of Epigenetics in Unpacking or Not Unpacking DNA in Accordance with Environmental Demands for Adaptation and Change in the Evolutionary Potential of the Humans Species Plays a Huge Role, in just one Lifespan of Human Life in how 'we' enjoy life; Or Do Not enjoy life and go as far in ways of Negative Epigenetics and Negative Neuroplasticity in Eventually Killing Ourselves; or Trying to Kill the Human Species; or doing both in one last Big Bang of Life that Makes one Feel Relative at least in someway to Existence as whole.

I've been really Depressed in about 7 Years of my Life overall and in the First Case Social Isolation in College as well
as few resources and not being comfortable in my own skin led to that situation in College Years for about a Year
and a Half; with 66 Months as a Shut-in in my Bedroom starting at 47, Functionally Disabled with a total of 19 Medical Disorders including the Worst Pain known to Human kind assessed as literally worse than the Torture of real Crucifixion too from wake to Sleep for 66 Months, where about 33 Months into that Hell I came aboard the 'Wrong Planet' to do
anything to save my life from that Suicide Disease as no drug would touch the Pain. It really S88KS to be Socially
Isolated, Perhaps worse than that Pain, Particularly when Emotions Disappear that are the Glue of all
Cognitive Executive Functioning in Feeding yourself by Making Meals and Stuff like that hands on in
the Three Dimensional World. For all Practical Intents and Purposes I lived in Hell then as other folks
still do.

Still though that Stint in College Age as a Socially Isolated Male Smart without Economic Resources more
than a Peanut Butter Sandwich each day and an old Beat up Car to commute Back to my Mother's Home as
Yes, I also Worked up to 3 Part Time Jobs too; but Life is Expensive in a World that Runs on Money just to
make Basic Ends Meet in Getting Enough to eat, a Bed, and Some Transportation to Study in School for 19
Years total without any reward but Grades as Hell no even if you are a Pretty Boy that's not enough to Attract
Women; Particularly and mostly if you are not even comfortable in your own Body with Body Language in Real Confidence
As Actual Research now that shows at above 60 Percent the way a Male Exudes Confidence as Core Status and Power
in Body Language is by Far what it takes to Attract a Female now; not really any Different than 12 Thousand Years ago
as Classical Evolution is Mighty slow. Social Economic Status as far as Fat Wallets go ranks in the Single Digits in the
Percentages of Studies that have been done that Speak to What Women 'Really Want'; But True if there are no really
Confident Men Left with Little Body Language that actually shows that; what do Women do; they do the Best they
can; just like I did back then In different sHades of Hell both times; the Second time around for the 66 Months
it helped that My Wife Still Looked like the Mythological Version of an Indian Princess or the Egyptian Goddess
Isis; but without Emotions most everything in life is literally a Moot point but just breathing the next second in
Basic Snake Brain Survival. And yes that's where one Learns that all the IQ Points in the World is a Moot Point
too; and enough Money to last the Rest of your Life without the Courage of the Lion and the Heart of the
Tin Man too. Yes, a Metaphor I enjoy for this is Eye of the Tiger and Heart of the Lion. It doesn't matter
How Big Your Scarecrow Brain is in the Audience of a Jordan Peterson Debate without the Eye of the Tiger
and Heart of the Lion Actually Physically and Emotionally Earned in a Real Bootcamp Initiation of Life; Incels
come to Prove this in all the ways they come and sure in the very rare cases they become actually Physically Violent too
that yes there Is a real Problem with Many Men these days as my Daddy who left when I was Three eventually Finishing
his 46 Year Law Enforcement Career, including a Stint in the Army Said, Son go into the Military they will make a 'Real
Man' out of you. That really Pissed me off; not only because I hadn't really earned my Eye of the Tiger Yet or Jordan
Peterson Lobster Pose, even though I was a Very Loving Boy that the Girls did at least see as a Friend back then;
Yes that really Pissed me off for my Father Never said anything much else to me when we visited him but Hello
and Goodbye with an occasional Half Lipped Grin. (Pro Tip: Women WANT a Serious Look more than a Smile as
Research shows too). My Father got married 4 times and twice to the same Woman; Yes, the Lion Heart
that reaches out and touches the Lioness Heart more than Reading the Paper and watching NASCAR does
count too. But never the less, he didn't have any problem attracting Prospective Mates with his somewhat
Fred Bond Persona as yes, his name was Fred too. So in other Words; I have a Huge amount of Empathy and Sympathy
and Compassion and Cognitive Empathy for Incels for I realize just how cold it is to live in those Shoes for Years of my
Life too; But NO I have NO Sympathy for Harming any other. I wasn't always a 'Pretty Young Man' either for I was called Skank for my Looks in Middle School; and I guarantee you I can prove with Photos that I was nerdier looking than any Dude sitting in the Audience of Jordan Peterson's Latest Televised Debate on Youtube.

So what did I do; I pursued my Epigenetic Potential across my Lifetime too; for even though I had the typical Ectomorphic
Body type back then; that didn't hold me back even though Science said I would remain that way according to averages then. And yes, I realize most of the Folks Behind these Avatars on this 'Wrong Planet' have the Same Issues too as that is an Inherent Part of the Autism Spectrum at core in difficulty in Body Language as whole. It was easy to 'spot the Aspie' in me and my Sister for we rarely moved our arms and kept them close at our Side Looking Down at the Ground to make Sure we Moved ahead with Falling. No; back in those Middle School Days and Even in High School the chances of me
even Becoming an Athletic Director of a Military Installation still as a Nerd uncomfortable in my own skin and still
with no real knowledge of Team Sports, considered a Valuable Commodity and that's it for my Computer and other
Analytical Problem Solving Skills then; the chances of that Happening were close to Zero Back in Grade Schools Days
and even Work Days too but I adapted and did what I had to do to survive by the skin of my Teeth until it almost
Literally Killed me then as the Medical Record continues to Show for my ill advised Response to Chronic
11 years old Stress not to ever Quit and do something that might other wise save my life. But what you do you
do when the only value others see in you is a limited set of Analytical Skills with no real Value folks see in you as
a Human Being to actually get invited somewhere together after work. You Stay and do whatever you have to do for
a long time ago you learned that your place in the Social Circle is really all that counts when it comes to really getting
ahead unless amazing Work Fortunes comes to fall your way as you fall too with Chronic Never ending Stress and come
Really Really Close to getting Dead.

No, My Problem wasn't so much Asperger's Syndrome or Even Bi-Polar; My Problem was the Environment I was raised
in without a Father to Show me the Cultural Role that would Be Expected of me to survive. It would have helped I suppose
if there were any other Male Members to Hang out with in my Extended Family but there wasn't; Just all Females and if you don't think that has an Epigenetic Effect on your Actual Physical Being; You just don't understand Basic Nature in how
Nature works with Nurture too.

The Good News is as far as my Case Study Shows at least; it's not too Late to actually become a Real Man with an eye
of the Tiger and a Lion Heart too. True; it's Not too late either to become an actual Folk Hero to Young Women all over
your Metro Area for you show them what a Real Fearless Man Looks like in Dance; not giving an F what anyone
else says for you to be the Free you want to be. I just wanted to Celebrate Life for that worse that Crucifixion
Pain went away in my Right eye and ear. So I danced; I already went to hell; ha! no one was gonna F with
me then; and along the way the More I moved not unlike Mythological Samson and Hercules the Stronger I got
and the more Confident I got until it went as Far after a 3 Hour Dance in a Huge Metro Bar where a Group of 3 Women
who I still have photos with Agreed they would Love to get married to a Man just like me, even though then I never spoke
a Word to them and no doubt hehe; they would have changed their mind if I went on like I do about my Special Interests
Still. But It didn't Matter for that 'Indian Princess' was still waiting at home for me and that Woman Married me for the
Size of My Heart that always came back after the Winter of my Soul.

It's True, I 'learned' to Write Poetry too and around the same time those Women Said I was their Ideal of a Man to get
Married to then as I guess they didn't realize I was getting close to the age to be their Grandfather too; yes, another
Woman from around the World who never met me said my Wife must be the Luckiest Wife to be Married to someone
as Poetic as me. My Wife isn't into Poetry but she's always been into my Lion Heart. Now I have the Courage part
and the Eye of the Tiger too. It took 53 Years of Never Giving up and almost Dying and going to different Levels
of Hell Twice but I finally became complete as the Eye of the Tiger finally came to 'marry' the Heart of the Lion too.

Yes, I'm complicated but simple enough to understand what really counts in life most for every Straight A
is nothing compared to when the Eye of the tiger gets Married to the Heart of the Lion Within complete.
But it's true Words are an excellent Slave to My Heart and Courage now.

Life is Deep; Don't Stop Diving; And Don't Forget to Come Up For Air.

It's Not Easy being Human, Period. Let's Lift each other up, instead of the other.

And Don't Judge A Book by A Cover Or the Size oF iTs Words If You Will.


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Last edited by aghogday on 15 Sep 2018, 11:54 am, edited 2 times in total.

Mythos
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15 Sep 2018, 11:33 am

kdm1984 wrote:
The biggest problem I see, and which has given rise to this phenomenon, is with the most extreme and stubborn fringes of both feminists and incels. These people are not willing to admit certain realities about the other gender, or make changes to adapt to this reality -- even if it would better both their own current situations, and help protect the rest of society.

Two classic scenarios in particular (please note that I'm talking about the extremes here, too; for others who are frustrated by lack of success, and yet aren't constantly rage-dumping about the other gender, please refer to the final paragraph, and not the next few):

* the woman who loves to shout about her supposed 'strength' and 'independence,' and thus doesn't want to be involved with a man who might actually challenge some of her selfish whims by expressing natural and reasonable needs of his own -- she naturally remains single (usually expresses rage toward men verbally)

* the man who makes little to no attempt to make himself more attractive to women (bad hygiene, disrespectful manners, and so forth), and then wonders why he cannot get any action in the sack -- he naturally remains single (may initially just express rage verbally, but in cases of incel terrorism, the violence also becomes physical and concrete)

Both groups are extremely and unhealthily self-centered (it's all about their own desires, and not others), but a relativistic society has led us to "live and let live," and so these people's horrible views remain uncorrected, and so we're seeing an increase in their number and extreme action. They themselves are so hardened, that any efforts from other more stable people to make them see and deal with life in more productive ways, would be difficult to apply anyway, even if they were shown the objective folly of their viewpoints.

Some people sadly really seem hellbent on preserving their own bitter self-absorption and ways rather that put effort into a workable solution to their problems, and finding like-minded individuals on the Internet has only fed a tribal mindset and echo chamber that makes them think their extremist views are somehow legitimate or okay.

One other thing -- for those who have not fallen to the extreme, and yet who say, "but I've tried these things, and there just aren't any good men/women out there!" Well, keep searching and trying! (And consider being more realistic about the opposite gender; some people seem unwilling to accept even the most minor of perceived flaws in another human being, and demand either perfect Prince Charming or perfect Playboy Centerfold.) Anything worthwhile in life takes LOTS of discipline, initiative, and work. Often many, many years of it, dealing with many failures in the process. That's just life, and this principle can be applied in other areas beyond relationships. For example, autistic meltdowns have led to me losing or quitting jobs in the past. Rather than demand employment cater to my whims, I've had to learn better social skills and coping mechanisms.
As always, your views are no-nonsense and balanced. I'd just point out a couple of things;

Firstly, that I do believe workplaces need to put more effort into finding an autistic-friendly medium. No company or public organisation can entirely rearrange themselves of course, but little things help; quiet spaces, leniency to the idea that autistic staff may at times become overwhelmed by noise or crowds, perhaps more cooperative work with people who can support us, etc. They don't need these things but it would be nice to see.

Relationships are not always the same in this case of course but I think partners can be more cautious with what they do and how they do it. To find emotionally stable support (not a crutch) is important. It seems that when relationships break up, a large part of the impact is how the other side triggers this. If it's done sensitively, it can lead to less insidious beliefs about the opposite side (just going by assumption).

As for rejection, it's also equally as difficult. I remember seeing somewhere that social rejection and the emotional impact can be equated to actual physical pain.

That would bring me to my second point, which is to see emotional abuse as equal to actual physical abuse. Regardless of the circumstances, humiliation can be anything from a shrug off to days or weeks of continual emotional strife.


Finally, no gender has a monopoly on emotional pain but when I say this, that doesn't mean that cases like incel terrorists are equally female as male. Really, what it means is that women deal with this damage as well. They can be hurt, but if this happened and they happened to go on a killing spree, I'd rather know why they did it than assuming that they were always leading to doing so, regardless. Circumstances are an important part of cause. Dealing with it from a purely psychological perspective won't give us the big picture.



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17 Sep 2018, 8:44 pm

aghogday I think that people in tribal communities act less like lobsters than people behind keyboards. The prohibition against gay sex came from colonizers. As long as you will "work" to grow the tribe sufficiently, they tend not to care what else you get up to.


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17 Sep 2018, 11:09 pm

jrjones9933 wrote:
aghogday I think that people in tribal communities act less like lobsters than people behind keyboards. The prohibition against gay sex came from colonizers. As long as you will "work" to grow the tribe sufficiently, they tend not to care what else you get up to.


Yes, in General it seems to be true that Primitive Tribes who Live Closely Foraging together are Permissive in
A Full Range of Sexual Activities; but not always according to the Scientific Research that has been done
in regard to some Primitive Tribes that are not Colonized. The Research has already been Shared by others
on this Site; but here it is again for Reference as the Folks in this Particular Tribe Really do See Sex as Work
to make Children without any apparent interest in either Masturbation or Homosexual Behavior but Cultural
Practices in Smaller Societies can and will be Homogenous like this in Common Purpose and Meaning where folks
really do require the Help of each other to Survive and they will do whatever it takes to make that Happen for Real.

The More Distance there is in actual Flesh and Blood connection, the farther away Empathy, Sympathy,
and Compassion Grows as this is now even more Evident online as one can easily count the instances
of Inhumane Behavior in a Day or a F in Hour. One can also Count the instances of little to no Emotional
Language in Sentences too as that is how in some cases Investigators Determine who those
Folks are with Psychopathic Leaning Tendencies in Potential Cruelty to others now more likely
To reflect that in Language without Personal 'Affect'. Yep, at times it seems quite a Bit like 'The
Lord of the Flies' Online. A Common Practice is Pathetic Attempts to Gaslight the Reality of others;
But True, it's hard for folks to get satisfied who don't get the Warm and Fuzzy response in Oxytocin
release from actually being Nice to other People and tolerant of Differences for that all Natural Human
Intrinsic Reward of Love as Science Shows Now, Neglect and Abuse from ages 0 to 4 is still sadly
a Major Causal Factor for the Wiring for Love Being Absent or Later Destroyed by Chronic Abuse
by others, including Bullying. In My Area that is Truly Still Ignorant, in some Cases, in the Deep Bible
Belt South Against folks of Different Sexuality; and even Racial Characteristics still as well as Gender Stereotypes
too; a very Androgynous Young Man recently was Beaten by a Gang of Human 'Animals' and Chronically Bullied until He Committed Suicide. In a More Civilized Place Like a 'Primitive Tribe' or 'Human' City he might have otherwise Been Elected Homecoming King or Celebrated as a 'Two Spirit Shaman'. I Practically Had to Become 'Superman' Here to Dance In Public in a Mix of Free Style Martial Arts and Ballet at 240LBS for almost 10K Miles in 5 Years now; Leg Pressing Half a Ton 52 times now Still too at age 58; but for Many Young Folks who were ever Bullied for Being Different; I am also noted as an inspiration for them to Live as Different without Fear. Yes, my Friend, I do actually Do 'the Revenge of the Nerds' almost everywHere I go. I wore A Dance Shirt 'Proudly' Yesterday in front of all the 'Trump Voters' that said 'You Can't Fact Check Crazy' for I wasn't really talking about me; I was talking about their Savior for them to guess, yes or no. I don't Like Bullies much but Keyboards Bring them out like Cockroaches; and I have nothing personal against Cockroaches; in Fact, the Wife has to 'Dispose' of them if they manage their way close to my home. I've been to hell for 66 Months; Cockroaches are Immaterial in Hell
And Heaven now
too at least to me..:)

https://repository.kulib.kyoto-u.ac.jp/ ... 31_107.pdf


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