Male disposability, the Apex fallacy, and male privilege

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dorkseid
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26 May 2021, 9:37 pm

Dear_one wrote:

As a man, your "privilege" is to be able to handle bigger risks and possibly win bigger prizes.


It is only the minority of men whose risk taking pays off for who possess that privilege.



Dear_one
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26 May 2021, 9:44 pm

dorkseid wrote:
Dear_one wrote:

As a man, your "privilege" is to be able to handle bigger risks and possibly win bigger prizes.


It is only the minority of men whose risk taking pays off for who possess that privilege.


Of course the risks are seldom rewarded, but they can't be avoided. As a man, you just won't get as much sympathy or help.



dorkseid
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26 May 2021, 10:14 pm

Dear_one wrote:
dorkseid wrote:
Dear_one wrote:

As a man, your "privilege" is to be able to handle bigger risks and possibly win bigger prizes.


It is only the minority of men whose risk taking pays off for who possess that privilege.


Of course the risks are seldom rewarded, but they can't be avoided. As a man, you just won't get as much sympathy or help.


But somehow I'm privileged?!



Dear_one
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26 May 2021, 10:19 pm

dorkseid wrote:
Dear_one wrote:
dorkseid wrote:
Dear_one wrote:

As a man, your "privilege" is to be able to handle bigger risks and possibly win bigger prizes.


It is only the minority of men whose risk taking pays off for who possess that privilege.


Of course the risks are seldom rewarded, but they can't be avoided. As a man, you just won't get as much sympathy or help.


But somehow I'm privileged?!


No, you are slandered. I thought that was covered.



dorkseid
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27 May 2021, 12:41 am

I meant that society claims I'm privileged, not that you do.



XFilesGeek
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27 May 2021, 1:38 am

dorkseid wrote:
I meant that society claims I'm privileged, not that you do.


You can be privileged in some areas, and disadvantaged in others.

The idea of "privilege" is NOT that you can't have any problems or ever face adversity.

My mother was beaten and raped by her own father for several years, and she never received help, despite how "protected" MRAs claim women are.


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magz
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27 May 2021, 2:57 am

Debating who has it worse is pointless.
Every tragedy is a tragedy that shouldn't be devaluated.

In my culture, the most prevalent kind of violence is male-on-male. My brother had it a lot worse than me when we lived in a not-so-nice neighborhood. Attacking a woman is considered a shame even among many lowlives - still, domestic violence exists.
Unfortunately, when the victim of domestic abuse is an adult male, he has way less social understanding and systematic help - and I find it unfair. Even if such situations are rare, they deserve fair treatment.

But that's my culture, I certainly can't speak for the whole world.


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XFilesGeek
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27 May 2021, 3:21 am

magz wrote:
Debating who has it worse is pointless.
Every tragedy is a tragedy that shouldn't be devaluated.

In my culture, the most prevalent kind of violence is male-on-male. My brother had it a lot worse than me when we lived in a not-so-nice neighborhood. Attacking a woman is considered a shame even among many lowlives - still, domestic violence exists.
Unfortunately, when the victim of domestic abuse is an adult male, he has way less social understanding and systematic help - and I find it unfair. Even if such situations are rare, they deserve fair treatment.

But that's my culture, I certainly can't speak for the whole world.


In the U.S., men are also much more likely to be victims of street violence.

However, women are much more likely to end up maimed/dead in domestic abuse situations.


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carlos55
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27 May 2021, 7:35 am

I believe male privilege is not having to worry about being raped as an adult.

Male rape is extremely rare outside prison, but women have to worry about it all the time I should imagine.

Being on your own in a strange place, walking down the street at night or on a new Date not knowing the other person who is likely to be physically stronger by an order of magnitude.

Although I hate all victimhood culture and terminology in general.


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dorkseid
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27 May 2021, 8:12 am

XFilesGeek wrote:

You can be privileged in some areas, and disadvantaged in others.

The idea of "privilege" is NOT that you can't have any problems or ever face adversity.

I agree. But that is not how the concept of male privilege is presented by popular media and Twitter mobs.

XFilesGeek wrote:
My mother was beaten and raped by her own father for several years, and she never received help, despite how "protected" MRAs claim women are.


I'm very sorry about your mother. I did not in any way mean to imply that women are protected from violence or adversity. my intention is to address the issues men face and how they are often downplayed or ignored.

magz wrote:
Debating who has it worse is pointless.


I fully agree. And it was never my intention to argue that women's lives are easier than men's. I'm just fed up and tired of men's issues being dismissed and brushed aside.

carlos55 wrote:
I believe male privilege is not having to worry about being raped as an adult.

Male rape is extremely rare outside prison, but women have to worry about it all the time I should imagine.

Being on your own in a strange place, walking down the street at night or on a new Date not knowing the other person who is likely to be physically stronger by an order of magnitude.

Although I hate all victimhood culture and terminology in general.


That's true, but it is extremely specific. And by that same logic, not having to worry about street violence is female privilege. Rape is horrific, of course. But so is getting beaten/shot/stabbed/etc...



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27 May 2021, 9:08 am

Being of a military mind, I think women should be assigned combat roles. That's just me though.


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Dear_one
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27 May 2021, 11:50 am

I agree that rape is more of a danger to women, as it may leave them having a love/hate relationship to a resulting child. A mother bonds with her baby through her body, but a man can usually avoid bonding through distance.
Society was formerly organized so that men would protect their female relatives, but the male protective instinct is general, and something he enjoys using. An attractive young woman I knew used to get off work at 2 AM in a very rough neighbourhood, with a dozen blocks to walk home. She would watch for any shady-looking men, and as soon as she saw one, she'd go right up to him and ask him to walk her home. They all became perfect gentlemen, happy enough just to be seen walking and talking with her.
I don't know how many people are conceived through rape, but I don't think it is close to the 10% of men who wind up devoted to another man's child, while being cut out of the gene pool. I can't balance those two piles of anguish, but they do make me certain that gender equality is impossible, and that we should seek parity instead. Equality tries to treat everyone the same, while parity is about trade-offs, with each group getting more of what they prefer in the mix.



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27 May 2021, 2:28 pm

I remember watching an episode of Dr. Phil, years ago about a male suspect who was involved with date rape. He raped his girlfriend and he was trying to convince Dr. Phil and the audience that his girlfriend was the one who raped him. Dr. Phil asked him, "Are you sure, because it really takes a lot to rape man." The audience was laughing at the boy and so was I, just because what Dr. Phil said is so true. I wasn't laughing about the rape itself. I would never do that.


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dorkseid
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27 May 2021, 5:11 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I remember watching an episode of Dr. Phil, years ago about a male suspect who was involved with date rape. He raped his girlfriend and he was trying to convince Dr. Phil and the audience that his girlfriend was the one who raped him. Dr. Phil asked him, "Are you sure, because it really takes a lot to rape man." The audience was laughing at the boy and so was I, just because what Dr. Phil said is so true. I wasn't laughing about the rape itself. I would never do that.


I'm assuming that what was meant here is when a man is specifically raped by a woman. I think there's a technical distinction between rape and "being made to penetrate". I don't claim to understand how much effort it would take for a woman to force a man to penetrate her against his will. But in any event, sexual violence should never be taken lightly or treated as a laughing matter, regardless of the gender of the victim. I don't know what actually happened in this particular instance, but Dr. Phil and his audience should be ashamed of themselves for how they made light of the topic of rape in general.

I always considered Dr. Phil a piece of garbage. He exploits his patients for his own financial gain. While I'm sure all his guests sign the necessary wavers to absolve him of any legal liability, there remains a huge difference between what's legal and what's ethical. What he does remains a violation of his Hippocratic Oath, regardless of how well he covers his butt legally.



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27 May 2021, 5:24 pm

I'm thinking that I wish you felt more pleasure in life, Dorkseid.

Do you like Nature. Beaches. Mountains. Animals?

I am truly sorry that you went through so much in the past. But this is the present....and you are capable of doing things to enhance your own pleasure.

My mother can't get over her traumas---and that frustrates me.



dorkseid
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27 May 2021, 6:40 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I'm thinking that I wish you felt more pleasure in life, Dorkseid.

Do you like Nature. Beaches. Mountains. Animals?

I am truly sorry that you went through so much in the past. But this is the present....and you are capable of doing things to enhance your own pleasure.

My mother can't get over her traumas---and that frustrates me.


This is completely off topic.

Its been a very long time since I went to the mountains. I live in a landlocked state, so beaches or not an option, and I always hated getting sand stuck everywhere. I love animals, but I don't have the time or means to take care of a pet right now.

Though it can be exhausting at times, I find the work I do in special education extremely rewarding. Just not in a financial sense.