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Jay123
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12 Jul 2022, 8:13 am

I consider myself normally quite a friendly and nice person, and I do have a decent number amount of friends, but I have little to no social graces, and I tend to come off as offensive and blunt without intending to be. Sometimes people actually scold me for my social awkwardness. I've noticed this in a lot of people on the Spectrum. On rare occasions I'm called an as*hole even though I don't intend to be. Does this ever happen to you?



klanka
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12 Jul 2022, 8:19 am

It used to. Like someone would ask if I wanted to do something social and I would just say 'no' because I was just being honest. I noticed the person became cold towards me.
Even though now I don't offend people it's just moderately better, still a below average experience of life.



kraftiekortie
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12 Jul 2022, 8:20 am

I'm not thought of as an as*hole.

It's more like, sometimes, I'm thought of as being sort of a doormat.



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12 Jul 2022, 8:27 am

Unintentionally yes I do. I do it because I just don't like being two faced. If I have an issue with someone then I have no problem letting them know.

I can't ever remember anyone in my real life who has had a problem with letting me know what they think about me so I'm just passing that lesson on.


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12 Jul 2022, 8:39 am

Jay123 wrote:
Do you ever Unintentionally offend people?
Often, but usually when I respond to the literal interpretation of a question with an honest answer, when I dispute someone's opinions with facts, when I am not influenced by flattery, or when I refuse to go along with someone's ill-conceived ideas.



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12 Jul 2022, 8:47 am

I offend my family sometimes, but I’m not open enough with other people to offend them.

My family is made up of very conservative Christians; I’m a very liberal atheist. I try not to get into politics or religion with them, but sometimes my dad brings stuff up in an attempt to goad me, I think. It’s hard to stay quiet after hearing loads of hate speech.


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kraftiekortie
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12 Jul 2022, 8:58 am

There are times when I "say the wrong thing," according to people who are conscious of minor social gaffes.

For most people, though, I don't "say the wrong thing."



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12 Jul 2022, 9:35 am

I'm too afraid to say anything that has an unintentional double meaning that some idiots online might take it the wrong way. I remember some woman posted on social media some October some years back and said she was embracing her black soul. She meant that the Halloween spirit was bringing out her dark side and all the sjw idiots believed she was trying to be more African American even though she is white. They kept harassing her about cultural appropriation until she deleted her posts.


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kraftiekortie
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12 Jul 2022, 9:37 am

I don't INTEND to offend people when I meow like a cat on the subway.....but people sometimes get offended, anyway :P



goldfish21
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12 Jul 2022, 12:40 pm

Yep.


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12 Jul 2022, 7:32 pm

Oh yeah, sure. I've been told that I suffer from foot in mouth syndrome more than once. Tact is not my strong suit. I prefer direct communication, and that can be really off-putting to people. I just don't like to lie to people or soften my speech to benefit them. It makes me uncomfortable. It gets frustrating mostly because people put meaning into my words that I didn't mean. Not to say that's the only time I offend...it's just the most common way I offend. *shrugs*



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12 Jul 2022, 8:51 pm

Yes. Sometimes I can anticipate it and decide it's not my problem, other times I'm pretty oblivious to the potential.


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shortfatbalduglyman
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12 Jul 2022, 8:52 pm

Sometimes someone says I offended them

Sometimes someone offends me

Anything could offend anyone

"Offensive" is a "slippery slope". Just like "disrespectful" and "rude". You can't measure "respect". Anyone could (correctly) claim that anything is "disrespectful", and then they automatically have the moral high road.

Not specific enough



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12 Jul 2022, 9:01 pm

Most people don't use words by their literal meaning, but sets of phrases that have become convention, and only vary the tone to communicate actual information. I'm not good at that game, abd I insult people often unintentionally, becayse either my tone is wrong or I'm misunderstanding/ breaking conventions.

At the same time, I have also been told I was quite daring, but right for contradicting people in superior positions when they were wrong. I had usually not weighed the risks carefully, but just spoken straight.


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HeroOfHyrule
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12 Jul 2022, 9:08 pm

I often offend people since I seem avoidant due to having social anxiety + being awkward. People will think that I'm uninterested in talking to them or dislike them.



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13 Jul 2022, 6:49 am

FleaOfTheChill wrote:
Oh yeah, sure. I've been told that I suffer from foot in mouth syndrome more than once. Tact is not my strong suit. I prefer direct communication, and that can be really off-putting to people. I just don't like to lie to people or soften my speech to benefit them. It makes me uncomfortable. It gets frustrating mostly because people put meaning into my words that I didn't mean. Not to say that's the only time I offend...it's just the most common way I offend. *shrugs*


Yeah, I can relate to this. They either find me funny or offensive. I get away with a lot too.


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