WHAT "sexual urges"?!

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Erm for the record there's no 'normal', I would hate to be a person who thinks like that. Some people feel the need to have sex others don't, who cares? I also feel bad for all the children in abstinence class getting nearly as much BS shoved down their throat as their religious parents and society have already shoved down their throats about other crap. I hate this world..

I don't think you're weird at all. I'm 23 and feel like I'm just beginning to bloom sexually.

Like you, when I was 16 I had a boyfriend. I didn't have any feelings for him, especially sexual ones. It just seemed like that was what was expected of me. He ended up pressuring me into a lot of things I wasn't ready for but I kept telling myself "this is what normal people do." Eventually I broke it off, but not before I really hated myself for it. I had a few 'relationships' after that but completely bailed as soon as things started getting physical. It just didn't feel right at all.

Last year I met someone who helped change things. The difference was this time I was very honest with him. I sat down and explained to him about such things as being emotionally distant, and having various sensory issues. I taught him how and when it was ok to touch me. He was totally understanding and let things happen at *my* pace. He never pressured me to do anything. If we were doing something and he noticed I seemed uncomfortable, even if I'd initiated it, he would ask if I wanted to stop, and if I was ok. When all the pressure was gone, I actually started enjoying it. It was definitely an eye-opening experience, and it really changed my mind about physical intimacy. I still have issues with actual sex, but I'm ok with making out and a little farther than that. For me it's less of an 'icky' issue and more of a vulnerability thing. But I think, one day, *with the right person* I'll be alright with it.

The advice I'd give you is don't worry about it. Don't force it and don't try to be like the supposed 'everyone else.' If there is sexuality in you somewhere, it will show its face eventually. Most of all, don't be afraid to tell your potential partners to take it slow. You're the only one who knows when you're ready to be in a physical relationship.

If you do turn out to be completely asexual, there are plenty of groups out there who will support you, especially online. I know, I went through a couple years when I thought that was the answer. In all honesty, I have to say I'm glad it wasn't.

No its normal I am a late bloomer (15) but I couldn;t get a girl if I tried I am definatly not a smooth talker that and I would prefer to wait last thing I need is a child.Though if a girl asked me out or for that I would say yes in heart yes I am despret I dont want to become the 40 year old virgin.

I'm 16 and don't see the 'big deal' about having sex, or even having a boyfriend. I'm straight, just not interested in anything at the moment. Sometimes I get a bit down on myself, watching my friends rant on about 'what they got up to' but I just don't think I'm ready for that yet.

And anyway, as I tell myself, I've got better things to do anyway XD

hmm, well i think its normal to masturbate i guess (though i dont). but u cant say its not normal to do watur body does naturally. as for sex with teens, well no. just the world we live in today, no. very hard to get on ur feet at 15 or 16 and raise a kid. i dont want to be a dad now so ill wait (like ill even get a chance).

Hey please check out my post http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt67526.html I seem to be the same as you.

I am 17 and I have very little "sexual urges". I am not completely asexual, but I'm much closer to it than most people. I'm just not very interested in sex, even if I don't think I'd exactly dislike it. I might even enjoy it. I just feel like I don't need it.

Many people act like sex is really important, almost like food and water it seems. They make a big deal about it, and I just feel like I don't really care about it, and I am always wondering why it is such a big deal.

I have no sexual urges and kids at school keep asking me who I like and when I say no one, they pick on me

I have them and some of it is towards my female friends though I don't push it at all.

I had sexual feelings about crushes after the age of 12, but i never wanted to actually have sex with anyone until i met the right person. Some people, NTs and Aspies alike, desire sex on a purely physical level, whereas for others, a whole host of other connections have to be present to make it enjoyable or desirable with any given person. Also, aspies often do develop later, and girls often need more of an emotional and personal connection before even wanting to think about sex. You're normal. Don't worry about it. You don't have to prove you are normal by being physical when you don't want to me. If anyone asks, just say you're picky and have high standards (in terms of guys), or complain that there's no good guys to date at your school/in your town. Probably most people will actually agree with you. And if anyone asks how far you went with so- and-so, tell them its none of their business! It isn't. You will gain more respect that way.

How on earth can one conclude that they're asexual at 16? I certainly don't mean to suggest it's invalid as a category, but at that point I would think it's far more likely you simply haven't reached sexual maturity.

Perhaps it's too foreign for me to understand. I vaguely remember masturbating long before I ever went through puberty.

I frequently anomolize (is that a word?) people when they ask me about who I'm physically attracted to, for i'm not physically attracted to people, and for some reason, people just can't understand this.

"Do you prefer people with blond hair, or brown hair?"
-"I dunno"

"Blue eyes, or brown eyes?"
-"Whichever, whatever."

"Some other physical aspect vs. some other physical aspect of the human?"
-"Don't care."

"So what do you find attractive/turns you on/ think is hot/some other way of asking the same question?"
-nothing

"Are you a lesbian?"
-"Donno."

"Do you think that guy is hot?"
-"Sure, why not?"

"But no really, do you?"
-"No. I think nothing of that person."


hahahahaha, I think it's so funny how hard it is for the majority to understand that I would, to a great intensity, rather read about Einstein's theories of relativity than oogle boys.

I'm going through the exact same thing! I would rather reproduce like an ameoba than... Yeah.
You get what I'm saying. It's bad enough dealing with other peoples relationships. I just want a person that I can chill with , and not necessarily anything else.