I want to be asleep by midnight tonight. Can't get over him

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TUF
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11 Feb 2019, 8:06 am

Any tips?

I mean obviously stay off the internet but I feel as compelled to it as if it was addiction.

I can't stop thinking about him and when I do stop, I just go off into fantasies.

Last three nights, I went to sleep at 3am. It can't be healthy.

And no I'm not stalking him. I'm either reading/talking about the news or looking up videos/pictures of handsome young men (not porn. 18-21 yo lads exercising or interviews etc) or talking about lads to gay guys and the gay guys get really graphic or venting then deleting it or writing fan fiction or writing about what happened between us or drawing sexy pictures.

He isn't my type anymore but I'm still obsessed and it's love hate, I don't 100% hate him. He still likes me too, he still thinks I'm hot and takes my masculinity seriously. I used to play football with him and talk about it with him and slag off Rangers with him...

It is a really bad idea to pursue it so don't suggest that.

And I'm spending all morning thinking about him too.

I have deleted and written vents all over the internet so obviously I'm uncomfortable talking about the details of what happened and have it judged so I've deliberately left it out here. Let's just say - bad idea to go back to him but still obsessed.

I just want to go to sleep tonight...



serpentari
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11 Feb 2019, 10:53 am

sorry, as a chronic insomniac, i can relate but have no good ideas xD or i'd have used them by now4


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fifasy
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11 Feb 2019, 11:03 am

The best method is drinking one or two bottles of rum, After that all you will think about is moeity.



BeaArthur
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11 Feb 2019, 1:05 pm

^ Not recommended. After that, you will either be dead (because you don't have an alcoholic's tolerance) or well on your way to being an alcoholic.

I'm having trouble with sleep lately too, no magic bullet, I just know a bottle or two of rum is not the answer.


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TUF
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11 Feb 2019, 1:30 pm

Lol I think he was joking, he knows my sense of humour.

If not then no, I deliberately don't drink. Apart from everything else, I'm still size of a kid...

(I think that's probably how my newspaper got written though, by a guy who's steaming... I'm only half kidding)

I think I'm actually gonna try the mindfulness bs. Seems very California to me though...

Last time I drank a lot, let's not get into politics but let's just say it was fun to be steaming and partying all the time for a month. My bins were full of Murphy's cans by the time I figured out I shouldn't drink so much. Happy drink is a good idea sometimes.

And certain things I need to quit feeling guilty over and just enjoy. Just quit thinking so much. I wish everyone would quit with the negativity and the over analysing.



fifasy
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12 Feb 2019, 12:44 am

I miss my sister at the moment, she was staying with my parents for a few months but is living on a Scottish island again now where she works on a community farm that helps youngsters with extra needs.

I suppose doing anything fun is a good way of distracting yourself from missing someone.

It could be a weekend break. A change of scenery often changes the mind too.



TUF
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12 Feb 2019, 1:26 pm

I'm breaking off from the internet but I can't really go travelling.

Besides all my favourite sort of places are reminders. Including easy-ish ones to access like my uncle's farm.

Absence of social media really helped last night. I got rid of the computer at 9 o'clock completely. My mood improved and what I care about really is being in a good mood.

I'm sorry you miss your sister. She sounds like a good person.

Routine and solitude are helping a lot.

I slept at 00:30 last night. Woke at 8:40. Gave myself time to wake then woke at 9.