Getting used to depression?

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magz
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13 Apr 2019, 7:58 am

The kintergarten announced they will be closed on Monday so at least the NT girl will stay home.
She's lovely but exhausting, very intelligent and good-willed but also a pushy, intrusive extrovert. She's getting crazy from too little human interaction when her kintergarten is closed.
I'm drowning. I started having meltdowns when anyone talks to me.
I told my husband, if the strike lasts until Easter, I'm going to be sick for many weeks afterwards.
He said, don't scare me.
I said, I was not trying to scare him, it's just the reality.
He concluded, one did not rule out the other.

He takes care of food and groceries but he's not really skilled with kids. Human interactions are definitely not his strength. Also, he works long hours.


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serpentari
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13 Apr 2019, 8:10 am

well i just had a meltdown right on my kid, who was f*****g wailing for a pen i confiscated, because she f****d up her PJ with it and also smuggled it to KG (which is forbidden too). that all with me being visibly ill.


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magz
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13 Apr 2019, 8:16 am

I wish I knew a solution to this.


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serpentari
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13 Apr 2019, 8:25 am

nothing works. friends say, she will grow out of it. as of now i feel like a total b***h who really doesnt deserve to be a mother. also i should not be hijacking ur topic. please forgive me. i should be supporting u.


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magz
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13 Apr 2019, 8:35 am

Oh, come on, knowing that someone is struggling with the same is kind of supporting


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serpentari
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13 Apr 2019, 8:38 am

ya it is for me. good it is for u too. struggling indeed. i am very lost at this time. not my usual quality, ya. still want u to feel better, uknoit.


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Diamondisis
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15 Apr 2019, 4:47 pm

My parents mistook my last episode of depression as just a really big tantrum. That's so not what it was/is



serpentari
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15 Apr 2019, 8:45 pm

we know...


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magz
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16 Apr 2019, 1:56 am

Yes, we know it.
It's good you know what was happening.


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serpentari
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16 Apr 2019, 2:29 am

magz. amazing skill in pinpointing) and ya, that is the most important part. u know, and keep that knowledge. and dont let anybody make u doubt it.


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magz
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16 Apr 2019, 10:03 am

It's not really a pinpoint, it's selfish, it's pointing out what I lack.
I have no idea what I'm feeling.
Just my stomach gets crazy again and my hands shake even more than usual.
And I have a strange sensation in my limbs, like they were frostbitten - numb and burning. Gets worse with alcohol, unlike real frostbite. Never had anything like this before.
I suppose I'm panicking but I don't feel it, it's buried deep in my body.


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serpentari
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16 Apr 2019, 10:43 am

been there, done that, got a tshirt. or 100. we could set up shop, ukno. so well. when i am trapped, when i see no way, when i dont know what to do - i look for the most morbid, scariest thing in my mindscape. and i go for it and take it down. past it lies the next level. each and every time. jump the shark. do it again. then, gradually, u find - u.


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sanity is a prison. insanity is doom. is there a third option, please?