I feel stupid

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I don’t know what to do. I’m not sure if I’m able to keep a job because of my mental condition. It never worked before in the past. Everyone here knows by now that the rooming house where I am is hell to live in. But the thing is it’s dirt cheap to live here and I don’t have to worry about bills. If I can’t handle the real world do I just beg to be put in a group home? Will I lose my freedom if that happens? Should I just get a job while I’m this terrible rooming house to see if I can handle it? I wish someone would just take care of me so I don’t have to deal with the real world. I’m no good at being an adult. I can’t help it if I’m like a kid. I hope I don’t end up homeless. It’s beginning to feel like I’m homeless anyway if I don’t feel comfortable enough to use the bathroom and bathe here. I’m sorry if I’ve posted something similar like this before. It’s just the world is not meant for people like me.

I am sorry that things are a struggle at the moment. I do not know much about group homes so I don't know if they are better or not.

In my humble and uneducated opinion, group homes sound far superior to your rooming house in terms of safety and personal freedom. Your rooming house sounded like absolute hell and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I worried about your safety all the time. You aren't stupid to need support in daily living, either in a functional way or because of financial means and your inability to hold a high paying job. Many of us can't do that and be fully independent in the types of housing we'd ideally desire. Your first priority should be safety. After that consider your mental health. If you can't stay with your parents, which seems to be the case, I would consider looking into group homes as a viable alternate to where you are now, without any sense of shame.

I see. I looked into what types of group homes are in my area. The people living there have intellectual disabilities and are like big kids even more so than me. So, maybe if I move to a different town... I don’t know. Of course my mom isn’t going to approve of anything I do because she never does. But at least if I prove to her I’m happier in a new situation it will work out. She’s just worried she’ll have to pick up the pieces if a decision I make doesn’t work. But I have to do something. This place is starting to drain all my energy. And yes it seems very sketchy and maybe dangerous here.

I would move into a group home if you have the freedom to come and go as you please.

It's better to be around of people with intellectual disabilities than around dangerous, sketchy types of people.

Yeah they are smart enough to leave and walk around town by themselves. And at least you get a personal allowance in those places. All I can do is talk to my psychiatrist and other people at mental health. There might not be a room available in a group home at the moment though. I’m already on the wait list to get into a group home or independent living support and have been waiting a few years.

Something that does get people out of here quick is if their health starts to fail. Then they are able to get into a seniors low income building or group home right away. So, I mean... there’s that.