Applied for volunteering but already worried

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Marknis
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16 Apr 2021, 6:18 pm

I talked to the museum I had in mind about volunteering at and they told me to fill out an online application then wait for two days to hear back from them. I did it last night and I think they will contact me back tomorrow.

However, I am already worried things could go bad. What if no one wants to be my friend? What if there are no single women? What if they decide to not take me on because I already have a job and they can’t find a way to mesh with my work schedule?



Mountain Goat
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16 Apr 2021, 6:59 pm

Wait and see how things go. Worst case is that you do not connect with anyone. What is there to loose? If you do make friends is will be lovely. You may never know unless you try it and see what will take place.
I think it will go well. Try it. You may like it, and good luck. Enjoy!


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IsabellaLinton
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16 Apr 2021, 7:09 pm

Is your goal in volunteering to meet single women? I hope your goal is to enjoy new interests and keep busy in hopes of feeling more cheerful, and developing your work skills. It would be great if you get to know new friends, men or women, but I hope that isn't your primary reason for seeking a volunteer position.

What made you choose museums? If you have an interest in museums I hope you can focus on them as a new hobby.

Also, I wish you well with having your application approved.



Marknis
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16 Apr 2021, 8:14 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Is your goal in volunteering to meet single women? I hope your goal is to enjoy new interests and keep busy in hopes of feeling more cheerful, and developing your work skills. It would be great if you get to know new friends, men or women, but I hope that isn't your primary reason for seeking a volunteer position.

What made you choose museums? If you have an interest in museums I hope you can focus on them as a new hobby.

Also, I wish you well with having your application approved.


I’ve actually been told it’s an avenue I should take for meeting new people so I am hoping it could lead to meeting maybe a nice glasses wearing girlfriend (Don’t care if I get flack for saying that. I know you haven’t said that but I’ve actually gotten flack from men here that I find women with glasses attractive). I also feel like it would be more productive than trying bars, coffee houses, and churches.

My mother pressured me to volunteer at one of the homeless shelters in the areas by the library I work but I don’t want to because they tend to have a lot of crime happening in them and I’ve experienced hostility from homeless people so I don’t want to go those routes. I chose the museum because it’s the only thing I feel safe doing and while it’s not a dinosaur museum which I wish it was, it’s better than nothing.

How exactly can I make a hobby out of museums?

Thank you, I hope this endeavor won’t be another dead end.



Last edited by Marknis on 16 Apr 2021, 8:51 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Mountain Goat
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16 Apr 2021, 8:18 pm

Museums are interesting. Maybe you could add some little dinosaurs in a mini display somewhere? Micro display? :D

Anyway. It is a great idea for you to volunteer. It should be good.


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HeroOfHyrule
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16 Apr 2021, 9:09 pm

It's very good that you are trying out volunteering. I am very proud of you and I think this will be a good experience for you.

Marknis wrote:
However, I am already worried things could go bad. What if no one wants to be my friend? What if there are no single women?

Regarding this, I seriously think one of the ways you can find a friend/girlfriend while volunteering is to not specifically focus on either of those things, but to focus on the helping others and socializing with others in general aspect of it. You want people to see you as a relaxed guy, not a desperate guy, that is just focused on his volunteering work, even if that isn't your whole mindset. Think about what you want in a coworker or friend in general and apply those standards to your behaviour, and people will appreciate you more for it, and may enjoy being around you enough that they want to hang out with you outside of volunteering.

I would also try to find new friends/acquaintances and then find girlfriends through them. Just like a job you shouldn't be hitting on your fellow volunteers or the people you are helping, and your new friends/acquaintances will allow you to make connections with more people if you hang out with them.

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What if they decide to not take me on because I already have a job and they can’t find a way to mesh with my work schedule?

You should apply to other places, and even try applying for the museum again later on (maybe in a few months or so if you don't find another volunteering gig). Places have different positions open all the time, so if you try again later they may have a spot you qualify better for and have the time for.

Also, I think a positive of this is you can apply to as many places you want without the stress that finding a job involves. You don't have to worry about getting the right pay or anything, since these positions don't pay, your main focus here should be helping others and gaining skills. Since I think you have said before that you are looking for better job, this will benefit you a lot.



Marknis
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16 Apr 2021, 10:20 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:

I would also try to find new friends/acquaintances and then find girlfriends through them. Just like a job you shouldn't be hitting on your fellow volunteers or the people you are helping, and your new friends/acquaintances will allow you to make connections with more people if you hang out with them.

You should apply to other places, and even try applying for the museum again later on (maybe in a few months or so if you don't find another volunteering gig). Places have different positions open all the time, so if you try again later they may have a spot you qualify better for and have the time for.

Also, I think a positive of this is you can apply to as many places you want without the stress that finding a job involves. You don't have to worry about getting the right pay or anything, since these positions don't pay, your main focus here should be helping others and gaining skills. Since I think you have said before that you are looking for better job, this will benefit you a lot.


I honestly wonder why my friends have never set me up with any potential girlfriend, especially my male NT friends.

The only places I don’t want to apply for are homeless shelters and the animal shelter because they are in bad parts of the city I live in, I’ve experienced homeless people threatening me for money or to give them a ride in my car (The homeless people in my area can be very aggressive and are resentful of those with money. They will even prey on other homeless people.), and the people at the animal shelter weren’t friendly.

It sometimes embarrasses me I’ve worked at the same place since high school and haven’t done something like start my own business or have a college degree for a career. I don’t even have an Associate’s and those are supposed to be the easiest ones to get.

Did I wait too long to reply to Isabella to get a response from her?



kraftiekortie
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16 Apr 2021, 10:32 pm

I’ve worked at the same place since high school, too—for over 40 years. I’m only a little embarrassed.

It’s certainly better than working at 13 different places in 13 years.



Marknis
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16 Apr 2021, 11:19 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I’ve worked at the same place since high school, too—for over 40 years. I’m only a little embarrassed.

It’s certainly better than working at 13 different places in 13 years.


I would feel different if a certain someone I’ve had bad blood with for many years now didn’t have plans to work there until retirement. I am not getting any younger and half of my life is over so something needs to change or I will most likely snap.



Marknis
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17 Apr 2021, 12:42 pm

No response yet. Was this all for nothing?



kraftiekortie
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17 Apr 2021, 1:13 pm

There’s somebody on my job who doesn’t like me, either.

Doesn’t mean I’ll quit the job.



MidnightRose
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18 Apr 2021, 1:47 am

Unfortunately filling out online applications and then never hearing back is just how things are nowadays. So if you get rejected, don't take it personal. That said, they could just be busy or whatever and not gotten back to you yet. You can always apply somewhere else, or apply for a new opening at the same place when it pops up if they do reject you.

And remember, any women in this museum are there to work at the museum, not to find boyfriends. Treat them normally, when guys give a girl weird preferential treatment it is very obvious. But being in an environment where you regularly meet new people will help you flex your social muscles so you can get along with women you meet down the line in life. And people in general, of course.



Marknis
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18 Apr 2021, 12:05 pm

I honestly can’t think of anywhere else I want to apply for. I’ve already mentioned not wanting to apply for the homeless shelters and the animal shelter as well as the reasons why.

I am honestly hoping I can befriend a lady and it can develop into a relationship.



ezbzbfcg2
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18 Apr 2021, 12:50 pm

Marknis wrote:
I would feel different if a certain someone I’ve had bad blood with for many years now didn’t have plans to work there until retirement. I am not getting any younger and half of my life is over so something needs to change or I will most likely snap.

I just hope that person doesn't have too much social sway in your workplace. It's bad enough having a workplace enemy, but when that person is socially powerful enough, others may also turn on you, even if you've done nothing wrong to them or they have no reason to dislike your personally. It can make life hell.



Marknis
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18 Apr 2021, 3:11 pm

ezbzbfcg2 wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I would feel different if a certain someone I’ve had bad blood with for many years now didn’t have plans to work there until retirement. I am not getting any younger and half of my life is over so something needs to change or I will most likely snap.

I just hope that person doesn't have too much social sway in your workplace. It's bad enough having a workplace enemy, but when that person is socially powerful enough, others may also turn on you, even if you've done nothing wrong to them or they have no reason to dislike your personally. It can make life hell.


She does. Not as much as she used to but it still happens.