“I don’t like you!”

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Marknis
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07 May 2021, 4:07 pm

I still remember those words from my ex-friend the night she called me to tell me she didn’t like me anymore and our friendship was over. My heart still hurts from what she told me and I haven’t been able to make a better life for myself since she decided she no longer liked me.



kraftiekortie
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07 May 2021, 4:10 pm

You've got to move on from this.

So what if she doesn't like you.

Other people will like you. They would like you even better once you start participating in threads and hang out with people here.



Marknis
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07 May 2021, 5:03 pm

I’ve honestly lost interest in the things that used to give me joy. I can’t watch anime without feeling put out that I have no one to watch it with me or why being a fan of a particular show didn’t translate to friendships while it did for others, I haven’t touched any of my video game consoles in a month now, I can’t listen to music without feeling defeated or wondering why it didn’t empower me back when I needed it to, and I’ve fallen behind in reading.



kraftiekortie
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07 May 2021, 5:17 pm

You might have to push yourself a little.....

You might not enjoy it at first----but SOMETHING just might click again.

This has happened with me.



Mountain Goat
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07 May 2021, 5:22 pm

Distance yourself from her. Now it is time to start liking yourself for a bit and enjoy being you.

You have qualities and abilities that no one else has. Develop them and use them for good things.


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Earthbound_Alien
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08 May 2021, 6:43 am

In time it will get easier and you will get over her...hang on in there.

I am sorry you are hurting right now.



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08 May 2021, 7:32 am

Marknis wrote:
I’ve honestly lost interest in the things that used to give me joy. I can’t watch anime without feeling put out that I have no one to watch it with me or why being a fan of a particular show didn’t translate to friendships while it did for others, I haven’t touched any of my video game consoles in a month now, I can’t listen to music without feeling defeated or wondering why it didn’t empower me back when I needed it to, and I’ve fallen behind in reading.


What you are feeling now has nothing to do with your ex-friend. Your brain feels bad and it randomly digs up something negative from your memory to justify completely irrational emotions.

Happiness is capacity to enjoy anything. If you think of it as your budget, when you enjoy something, you "spend" from this budget. Watching anime, playing games, listening to music - are all expenses, it can't make you happier. You can't spend if you don't earn and don't replenish your happiness budget.

Again: physical activity, direct sunlight, fresh air, healthy food. This is how you can replenish your happiness to be able to enjoy anything in life, experience positive emotions. Are you doing any of it?



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08 May 2021, 5:11 pm

.. abrupt detachment can linger for a long time .

even though it is a very sad time for you .. you have to persist in continuing . much like the loss of any person .. it takes time

just because she no longer likes you .. it doesn't make it your fault



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08 May 2021, 5:28 pm

If you believe people will keep slamming doors in your face,
then IMO, you'll never find a sense of real happiness.

Remember the fact that people will like you.


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08 May 2021, 6:14 pm

badRobot wrote:
Again: physical activity, direct sunlight, fresh air, healthy food. This is how you can replenish your happiness to be able to enjoy anything in life, experience positive emotions. Are you doing any of it?

^^^ Yep, this.

The first stage here is to break out of the depression-led cycle of constantly telling yourself everything is s**t, and looking for excuses why you can't change and can't feel happy.

That is a lie, it is the depression tricking you.



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08 May 2021, 8:12 pm

badRobot wrote:

What you are feeling now has nothing to do with your ex-friend. Your brain feels bad and it randomly digs up something negative from your memory to justify completely irrational emotions.


:thumright:


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Marknis
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08 May 2021, 11:06 pm

Earthbound_Alien wrote:
In time it will get easier and you will get over her...hang on in there.

I am sorry you are hurting right now.


Thank you. It’s been almost 8 years but it still hurts. If I had a girlfriend, I would be able to finally leave her in the past but life continues to deny me love.



AnonymousAnonymous
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09 May 2021, 8:51 pm

Marknis wrote:
Earthbound_Alien wrote:
In time it will get easier and you will get over her...hang on in there.

I am sorry you are hurting right now.


Thank you. It’s been almost 8 years but it still hurts. If I had a girlfriend, I would be able to finally leave her in the past but life continues to deny me love.


Brother Marknis, you cannot love to come to you at the snap of a finger.

You have to find your own sense of happiness as an individual before doing anything else.


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Marknis
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09 May 2021, 9:08 pm

AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Earthbound_Alien wrote:
In time it will get easier and you will get over her...hang on in there.

I am sorry you are hurting right now.


Thank you. It’s been almost 8 years but it still hurts. If I had a girlfriend, I would be able to finally leave her in the past but life continues to deny me love.


Brother Marknis, you cannot love to come to you at the snap of a finger.

You have to find your own sense of happiness as an individual before doing anything else.


I never once had that thought cross my mind.

I am not accepted as an individual.



AnonymousAnonymous
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09 May 2021, 9:10 pm

Marknis wrote:
AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Earthbound_Alien wrote:
In time it will get easier and you will get over her...hang on in there.

I am sorry you are hurting right now.


Thank you. It’s been almost 8 years but it still hurts. If I had a girlfriend, I would be able to finally leave her in the past but life continues to deny me love.


Brother Marknis, you cannot love to come to you at the snap of a finger.

You have to find your own sense of happiness as an individual before doing anything else.


I am not accepted as an individual.


This is not true and you know it!


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10 May 2021, 10:26 pm

There might be another girl around the corner, just waiting to be your friend.


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