Feel sorry for my mum
Last weekend my mother very gracefully and generously handed me some money specifically to buy myself some new shoes, because she knows about my money struggles and wanted to help out. I didn't want to keep it from my boyfriend, but I don't like hiding things from him so I said that my mum had given me some money to get some shoes, as I need new shoes. But we ran out of things like shampoo and laundry detergent and couldn't wait until next pay day to get some more, so he asked to borrow a bit of my money that my mum gave me. I didn't see no harm in that, but then one thing led to another and now the money has shrunk into £15, and I need expensive shoes because I walk a lot and my feet are awkward.
But my mum gave me that money specially for new shoes. I wish I hadn't told my boyfriend but then I'd feel guilty about that too. But how do I stop feeling guilty for my mum for being so generous? She'll probably be annoyed if I tell her that her money went on other things.
How can I stop feeling so guilty about everything and everyone? If I have autism (self-ism) shouldn't I just be thinking of myself and not be affected by other people's feelings? Not the case for me. But I can't betray my mum, it feels horrible.
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Female
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