Does anyone else just want to move to a fictional life?

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I've always wanted to live in my own cartoon worlds that I draw. Too bad it's impossible.

I think that the reason I sometimes wish I could live in a fictional life is that it offers certainty to a degree. The idea of a simple, modern fairy-tale where a happily-ever after is destined... it's a comforting concept, yet it is also dystopian depending on how you look at it. Especially if we're talking about a Stranger Than Fiction type of situation. It sure would be odd being a partially fictional character who meets their author. Which begs the question, what type of story would I be in? A comedy or maybe tragedy? Perhaps they're one and the same.

Stories, as well as life in general, tend to follow certain patterns and structures. However, they can't be fully predicted. I could be living in a perfectly peaceful story and the author could throw a tornado at me. The idea of fate is not one I particularly believe in, at least not in the traditional sense, but I am fascinated by stories about such concepts. It can seem bizarre when you think about how much a couple of seconds can change the course of history and set the future in the motion. How probabilities shift as life on Earth continues.

I remember expressing similar wishes when I was teenager, I wrote a post on another forum where I wished for someone else to take over my life because I felt disconnected from it and thought that perhaps someone else could do a better job at running things. As if I were a faulty program. I had plenty of expectations of adult life as a child, they were never truly my goals though, but rather what I thought I should be aiming for to be a good adult. As if I'd win an award for being a well-rounded individual. However, my teenage years taught me that some things are truly outside of our control and that thought can be strange and sometimes terrifying. That were are a mixture of unchangeable innate and malleable.

Sometimes I almost wish that someone would stop me and tell me that I'm doing everything wrong so then I could go "Aha! I knew it!"

Yet the reality is that we're all pretty clueless to an extent. We aren't all knowing beings. The biggest reality shock, moving into young adulthood from being a teenager, has been learning that I don't need to prove myself all the time. We're all trying our best to navigate life. Sometimes the people you think can guide you don't actually know what to do either and they might even turn around and ask you for advice.

Stories often present us with an easy to follow linear sequence of events. However, life isn't like that. It can be easy to think of history as a linear path, but it's more chaotic. Sometimes progress even goes backwards. In one single spot, thousands of different unrelated events happened. You might sit in a chair from the 2000's, listening to a song from the 70's, with a hairstyle inspired by 60's fashion whilst in the 2020's. Elements of history fade into the present in a mishmash that you probably don't give much mind to ordinarily.