Asperger's I HATE you

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It also says about environmental factors making it sound like an uncontrollable genetic disease itself. Also suicide. While suicide is tragic, it's not the same as dying from cancer or covid or any other deadly illnesses. I'm NOT saying suicide is less serious, and I'm not saying it's entirely a choice but it's still different from dying from natural causes when you didn't want to die at all.

I am a layperson.

I find that the best thing to do when you read about a study is to:

1. Read the Abstract at the beginning of the study.

2. Read the conclusions at the end of the study.


In order to properly read most studies, you would have to do lots of Googling. The substance of studies frequently are only understood by people who specialize in what scientific branch the study is in.

I'm sorry you feel so negatively about having Asperger's. I wish there was a way I could make you feel better about it, but I really can't. Obviously just saying that I personally find nothing wrong with being an aspie as long as I live in an aspie-friendly environment or around people who accept it isn't going to change your mind. Neither does my saying I have no unusual health problems and haven't even gotten covid (to my knowledge, anyway).

I'm also left-handed, that alone supposedly has shortened my life span and made me very unhealthy. Whatever.

I just feel great shame in it. I don't like the word Asperger's, and autism sounds too serious. While getting a diagnosis early helps other people on the spectrum, it never helped me. It has always made me feel edgy.
Like when I was 9 all the children at school had to have a vaccination for meningitis or something like that, but the night before vaccination day the school nurse called my mum urging her not to let me have it because it could "make my Asperger's worse". So I was the only child in the whole school to not have the injection, which made me feel singled out.
Then it caused me to have a great fear of injections in case they'll suddenly change my personality and rob me of all the social skills I did have. So when it was time for my tetanus booster I had a huge panic attack and yelled "I don't want to lose my sanity!" (Sorry if that offended anyone here, I don't mean that low-functioning autistic people are insane, I'm just saying what I said at the time). So my mum had to take me to the doctor to persuade me that I will be fine and that the tetanus booster won't affect my brain wiring.

If I hadn't had got the stupid diagnosis I wouldn't have had to miss the meningitis injection. What if I'd got meningitis and died? I really don't know where the school nurse had got that from but it took me years to get over my fear of injections.

I was never diagnosed but i always felt singled out and alone all the same. People just never had a Word to describe my weirdness. I sometimes wish i was diagnosed just so people could stop expecting things i can't do from me

To me, here's the worst part: How stigmatized we are.

Simply being on the spectrum is not as much of a hurdle (For me at least. Possibly because I have a mild case)

But the second anyone finds out you're on the spectrum, they act like you're worse than a drug addict/alcoholic.

There are reasons why I'm ashamed and even afraid of being on the spectrum:-

People with autism are often mistaken for being a criminal because we give off the wrong body language.

The freedom of speech NTs have that we don't. For example they're allowed to yell "you're weird!" to an autistic person's face but if we give our honest opinion to them we "lack empathy". So we've got to just be nice all the time which can get tiring in a world that is hostile and unsympathetic to us.

The sensory issues. Who can enjoy life when you're so bugged by noise all the time? Some noise is extremely distracting for me but I can't always keep my ears closed with earplugs or headphones every minute of the day, because then it makes communication and other things difficult. I like to talk and listen you know.

Some of the autism symptoms being poorly explained. For example, we've got to understand if an NT is rude to us because they're having a bad day otherwise we "lack empathy", but if we're having a bad day and we're rude to an NT it's suddenly a crime and we "lack empathy".

THAT f*****g WORD "EMPATHY"! !! !! !! !! !! !

That more serial killers, school shooters and evil dictators are being diagnosed with autism or reckoned to have autism. It really disturbs me. I don't want to share a spectrum with the worst people that have ever lived. What Hitler made Nazis do to the Jews and other innocent people, and yet in 2022 people can just sit back and associate Hitler with autism. And Putin. It's really going to reflect badly on autistic people.

And there are many more that I can't think of right now. I feel threatened by autism. Not autistic people like you lot here, but just autism itself and being associated with it. I can't believe I have it in my own brain!

i suppose it depends on how autism affects you

in your case its like you have your foot in the door of the nt world (sorry if that wasnt the right expression but cant think of another way of putting it that means you know how nts work and you relate to nts a lot and your sort of one of them but one thing that is holding you back from actually being them is autism and you get frustrated about it

with me its different as i am happy living inside my head and i am not affected by other people and their standards and expectations and i cant put myself in their shoes so i dobt know what im missing

I'm not surprised at all to hear serial killers, mass shooters, and brutal dictators have been on the spectrum.

Being on the spectrum is isolating. While the vast majority of us will never commit any of the aforementioned acts, it doesn't surprise me that some people on the spectrum end up boiling over.

Also, a lot of normies would totally go off the rails if they had to spend even one day on the spectrum.