I need to solve the root of this executive dysfuncsh*t since puberty before I ended up causing an accident or a fatal mistake.
It had to end by this month.
End of discussion. No more holding out, no more waiting it out. If I have to blow my savings, if I have to ask my relatives for money, I'll do it.
And if professionals cannot help me or misunderstand my situation, I'll take all the risks myself.
I already have an important piece to this sh*tty puzzle. I already have multiple breakthroughs from that alone within a year.
I'm nearing 30. I already wasted my 20s holding it out over the idea that "I'm too young".
I already spent nearly a year adjusting since I took 'risk'. It only took me a month of consistency to see the contrast.
I need it and I need it now before I make another near fatal mistake, while I'm still eloquent enough, while it still works, while it's not so bad enough I'm returning back to zero.
Not because I'm missing out, because I'm wasting or losing time, but because I'd rather NOT regress all because my body is being a sh*tty enabler for all the dysfunctions I want nothing to do with by itself "naturally adjusting" to it's sh*tty 'default deficit'.