Living with other people

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I know its common for HFAs to live at home or with other people. Especually when the job situation isn't working out. I just find myself wondering how that's possible.

Its almost impossible for me to live with someone else without them absolutely hating me. Its not like we argue, outside of relationships I never, ever argue with anyone. Yet somehow they see me as aloof or whatever and over the course of a month they all go from thinking I'm an awesome person to just not being able to stand my being within 100 feet of them.

Short social interactions I do great at now. People love me and say good things about me. Yet even people who have known me for years and like me end up just hating me for what seems like no reason after spending a few weeks under the same roof. Every time.

The only reason they usually give is that I don't interact enough and I'm a bit untidy, but I'm interacting with them more than I was before I moved in and my small messes are always 100% confined to my own space and aren't unhealthy (no food left out/bathroom messes/etc). So this just makes no sense to me at all. And they know I'm HFA too so you would think...

But anyway, I don't get it. How do you manage to live with other people most of the time? My own family hates me because of this. Its like people are fine with me as long as they are far enough away to not have to deal with me most of the time. I'm sure this issue is because of the Autism, but a lot of you seem to not have that problem at all? I just don't know.

I'll tell you, there is not a minute of my waking time right now that I don't dream about just getting away from my so-called "family." Bunch of arrogant s--theads, I just can't stand them. As I type this out, I sit in a master bedroom which I share with my dad. He is sleeping. My little sister's 14-month old toddler woke up 10-15 minutes ago and she came in asking whether my dad was awake. She probably wants to bring him in to sleep with my dad. Either the little boy went back to sleep or he is still awake (I am fully expecting to hear screaming from the main room, because she always gets mad when he wakes up in the middle of the night).

She has no sense of responsibility for her son, and expects me or my dad to watch him while she is goes to school, surfs Facebook, goes to the gym.

I have a bad habit of talking to myself, but it seems I have no freedom of speech. I can't do certain self-stimulatory activities. I can't breathe, I am simply being strangled by this f*****g family.

I look at other people at the college, at these Occupy(city-name) protests, certain internet sites, and they all seem so free. I want to graduate so I can be like them, free as the wind, not having to live with non-supportive people who put me under complete stress and expect everything out of me. I would rather be around people I could have intellectual conversations with, read with, watch TV/movies/anime with, play video/computer/tabletop games with. I live in Libya, in North Korea, right here smack dab in the middle of the United States.

Yeah I get similar results. Though I've noticed people have expectations of me regardless of my condition. Aparrently their opinion of me is more important than the fact of who I am. I used to think the problem was with me. However after careful consideration I realized the problem is with "other" people.

I guess I'm lucky that my mother isn't demanding and places no expectations on me. I doubt I could live with anyone else for long.

I've lived with my parents all my life & we have had lots of major problems getting along. My parents say I'm extremely difficult to live with because they my parents are NTs who are inconsistent, cant make plans or change em at the last minute & it throws me for a loop & it causes us to have arguments that become meltdowns for me. We also have problems getting along because I have different physical disabilities that they don't understand so they think I'm lazy for not having a job & for not doing certain things around the house. What helps us live together is that my parents are extremely caring about me & I like spending most of my time in my room: I think being able to retreat/get away from housemates(like hiding out if your room, spending most of the day out the house or having housemates be gone most of the day) is a major help for lots of Aspies who do live with others because we have less arguments when we don't see the people to argue with em.
Me & my parents are getting along a lot better & have a lot less problems than we used to btw because I'm trying to become a better person & be more responsible & independent & things Thanx to Megz being in my life

The problem is definitely other people. In fact I am ashamed to say that my entire immediate family is part of the other people who have a problem with me. When I was still living out of home I went to the trouble to get a diagnosis, got my mother to come with me so she would know first hand that I have an ASD. Instead she mistook the specialists advice about reasonable adjustments to mean that she can ignore that I have Aspergers and can avoid any mention to it at all. So my father and siblings then follow her lead. The hilarious thing is that I moved back in with them at the start of this semester because I had a part time job, a casual job and a full university load to deal with semester and they offered me extra support and to be understanding of my condition. The biggest bunch of lies I have ever heard. I'm stuck in what used to be an upstairs lounge, without any walls or privacy. My bed is a fold out couch. Everyone feels obliged to play their crappy techno dance music the second they wake up and disturb my sleep cycle every single morning. No one wants to even talk about my condition let alone understand that I cannot do everything they expect of me, although it is quite acceptable to blame me for having aspergers. And if I move anywhere else I either have to share with other people who may have a problem with the fact that I am not a neurotypical or I have to work an insane amount of hours on top of study/barely scrape by on government payments just to live by myself within an hour commute to campus. Can't f*****g win either way.

I think people just need their personal space. And it probably is not you. I live alone and for me personally, living alone is a very high priority. I would have to be very desperate before I consider living with others.

I loved living alone, but now that I can't, I like to at least have my own room. Maybe seems kind of selfish, but I can't stand being around people all the time. I need my "me time" and my "me space."