What was your reaction to getting your heart broken?

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Xenophobitress
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10 Aug 2012, 11:29 am

Mine was obsessive-compulsive and I tried to ruin my life as much as possible...For him...I hope my behavior isn't in any way normal.



chiastic_slide
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10 Aug 2012, 1:30 pm

I am better at noticing the diminishing returns now than I was previously - that is, through experience I get more of an inkling when people are cooling off...however I can never be sure of the reason or what I could do to rectify or have done to prevent it. Sometimes I could almost ask 'What do you want me to do?' This could be for any kind of relationship. I have had obsessive-like interests in people, like continuing to email even when they have made it perfectly clear they are not going reply with wishful things like 'maybe you didn't get my last email' or checking up on their social networks. I will not post so as not to harrass but sometimes I just like to see what they are up to. I can go around in a sulk when I'm heartbroken. It feels horrid. But sometimes I value that part of heartbreak because it highlights emotions that are usually dulled. This can be an excellent impetus to do creative things or get absorbed in something.



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10 Aug 2012, 1:31 pm

It always begs the question...

"What's wrong with me? Why am I not good enough?"

Okay that's two questions, but you get the idea.



PastFixations
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10 Aug 2012, 2:04 pm

To be honest with you... I faked being happy on Christmas and on my birthday...
I didn't want to do anything... didn't want to even eat...
That's my reaction to when I was heart broken... everyday was like this... I didn't want to turn to anyone and the only thing that I could really think of was to end my life.
This was... 2010 if I recall correctly.
Luckily though I got help and got my head around what actually happened.
Person I was with was interested in her gains regardless of the consequences.


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10 Aug 2012, 5:27 pm

Retribution usually.


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invisiblesilent
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10 Aug 2012, 5:43 pm

Completely cut the other person out of my life. I can't deal with them half-being around but not being with me anymore. At least if I cut them out totally I can get back to my old, pre-relationship routine. This is followed by self loathing and self pity for a couple months. That then progresses to just feeling lonely mostly but that stage can last a long time. I also kinda find myself hating the other person eventually, probably because I am a very black and white person (a common trait in this forum I suppose).



meems
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10 Aug 2012, 7:25 pm

At first the pain was a bit much. I wished and wished and wished for it all to be a bad dream. I wanted to have my life back the way it was. I cried a lot and then stayed in bed for weeks.

I started noticing that despite feeling crappy, my life was easier and better without him. Then I picked myself up and carried on. I wouldn't be with him again for a million dollars.

Now I know if I'm ever serious with someone again it's not going to be someone who isn't even worth my time. And I'm never going to involve myself with someone with so much baggage... ever again. I don't want to ever feel responsible for someone again.



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10 Aug 2012, 11:40 pm

The first time it happened, it wasn't a romantic heartbreak but that doesn't make it any less devastating. I shut down my feelings. I didn't feel good or bad, I just carried on and told no one. I kept trying to maintain some kind of relationship with the person but it only lasted a couple of desultory years. It was horrible.

The second time was a romantic heartbreak. I cried for the entire 8 hour drive from the apartment we shared to the city I was moving to. (I'm not a crier) Then I drank and went crazy for a while. (to be fair, I'd been drinking every night for the last 6 months of our 2 year relationship) I went to work every day and did the shopping and fed the cats, but I was completely nuts. I thought people could tell just from my face that I was completely destroyed and were avoiding me because of it. They were probably avoiding me because I had a constant angry face, wouldn't/couldn't make eye contact and when I did have conversations they were very weird.

The third time was weird. It was a romantic heartbreak but also something else. I don't even know how to describe the relationship without sounding crazy. I was obsessive about him during the relationship and then after the split, I became equally obsessive about security. I don't think I really believed he would ever try to hurt me, but I needed to have barriers just in case. Oddly, he was the one who broke it off but in later conversation he seemed more angry/hurt than me, the dumped one. I feel like I'm emotionally over this one, but I'm not sure how true that is. :roll:



DNForrest
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11 Aug 2012, 11:24 am

It started off with the inability to eat. For a week and a half after, the only thing I was able to consume each day was a single "Peach Perfection" smoothie from Jamba Juice. This resulted in me losing 10 pounds in that first week and a half.

After that I directed my frustration into getting back into shape, using the possibility that she left me because of my weight as motivation for working out on a daily basis.



AngelKnight
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11 Aug 2012, 7:20 pm

I didn't react well. Took a while to realize that being anywhere near her for the next 5 or so was just going to be toxic. That while was a little too long (about a year and a half or so). Being cheated on is a right bastard.