Are you scared to have a job?

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All the horror stories from my dad running a marina. Mom coming home yet calling coworkers "bringing work home" with her. Even my 16 year old sister missing out on BBQ's and Birthday parties working part time at a restaurant. Sure I was on disability and am trying to get back on disability and it looks bad at 30 getting back on it. I can't handle a full time and even doing the applications and questionnaires = panic attack upset so NO to getting a job (for now).

Sure SSI wouldn't be much and YES I still live at home but I can never see myself holding down a good paying full time job. Part time (doing what I haven't figured out yet.) Obviously when I do get back on SSI I can't make much which is fine. But do I even WANT a job after the horror stories I hear? Even on message boards across the internet nothing but bad things.

SSI is enough "income" for the occasional game and I can maybe look into housing and get help to live independently down the line (I am THIRTY after all) so broaden myself that way.

But can anyone relate?

What was your first job? How did you handle the "horror stories???? of parents and message boards online????)

Thanks!

May I pm you?

I think it all depends on the particular job.

My first job (part-time) was at a bookstore and I lucked out because I had a very kind and understanding boss, nice coworkers, and a pretty relaxed work environment. I genuinely looked forward to my shifts there as it gave me some social contact and kept me from getting bored.

Another job where I worked more recently was also very meaningful and enjoyable to me. On the other hand, at a couple other jobs I tried I couldn't stand either the boss or the work environment and had to quit pretty quickly, in one case in the middle of a shift.

So at least in my experience it really just depends on the nature of the job and the people you're working with. Not all jobs are bad. Also, as you'd imagine, working part-time is much easier and a lot less stressful than working full-time (which does tend to take over your life more, often in unpleasant ways).

the thought of a regular job is literally unfathomable to me. literally. my brain short-circuits if i even try to picture it. unskilled or professional, doesn't matter. i'm pathologically resistant against following orders that don't make sense (which is part of every job), i'm unable to work as part of a team, i get bored and distracted very easily, and i have a lot of difficulty maintaining a consistent routine (waking up in the morning is always difficult for me)

i've been self-employed for a few years now. part-time flexible hours, no commute, almost no human contact involved. i'm living with my parents. i could afford to move out again, but i've been getting along just fine with my parents lately, and it feels like it would be a waste of money right now. maybe next year

for me, the purpose of working today is "not having to work tomorrow", rather than paying my bills right now. i'm saving most of the money i make, and i intend to keep living a lifestyle that allows me to keep saving every month without having to work more, regardless if i'm staying here or not. and then, early retirement maybe, if i'm lucky enough. or maybe buying a modest house close to the beach in some forgotten part of the planet

I've had jobs I loved and jobs I hated and jobs I sometimes loved and sometimes hated.

Part time is good. I just got a part time job. I'm doing skip tracing for a bounty hunter and going on jobs with him. It's part time and I enjoy it. I've done both bounty and PI work before and you can usually set somewhat your own schedule with that.

I also used to write for a newspaper, op-ed weekly column, and also some other things and that's definitely my own schedule.

Find something you like and apply for it. If you have no experience at it tell them and tell them you're a quick learner if you are and tell them your qualities that would make you good at it. I've talked myself into tons of jobs I'm not qualified for and learned them and did good that way. Since I had my kids I haven't work d much though. But they are grown now and a bounty hunter friend offered me part time work so I took it. I'm 52 and thrilled that somebody doesn't think I'm too old for the chase and take down.

What do you like to do that you would like to do for work?

My dream job is one I read about on the suntan oil bottle when I was a teenager. I used to use Hawaiian Tropic dark tanning oil with no sunscreens and it says on there "warning, only for the professional Tanner". Turns out there is no such thing, that's only advertising

_________________
I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

The only horror story I heard of was when my mom got bullied at work by her boss and no that didn't scare me. She went somewhere else and quit that job. I was a naive 16 year old then so I didn't know how tough it would be to get a job for someone like me. But my first job was working in the school library and thrift store and that wasn't even part time. Then I started working at the hotel and it was between part time and full time. I have gotten anxious before from working long hours but stuck with it because I thought I was just being lazy and I didn't want to be.

Then I worked full time at another hotel and the hours were fixed and my days and yes I had to miss lot of stuff and that is life. I found out I was abusing requesting days off and they were actually meant for when you have a doctor's appointment or going to a local wedding, etc. not for your personal time just so you can go to a group or go to some event. But once I found out what those requests were actually for, I quit doing it. Yes I did experience my own horror story here. I had a boss who didn't understand my problem so he always thought I lacked common sense and they always moved stuff around at work and I was always expected to remember where everything was and I was expected to remember to do things than being reminded. I did a lot better when I worked day time because my work was more structured and there were less interruptions. I also had less anxiety too because of less conflicts and less mistakes I made. But I always stuck with it because I needed the money to work and I kept on trying.

I now work part time. It's what I can handle right now and yes this would make me miss out on my son's school stuff. I only get one floating holiday a year and I don't want to be a burden to my other coworkers because if I ask for time off for my kid's thing, then everyone else has to pick up on my slack at work for that day even though it wouldn't be much. Just one extra task is all for each co worker.

yep, im completely terrified, my mother said she thought i was being arogant and an A**hole thinking that i could just not do it, until i told her how i actually feel about it, now she understands and isn't pressuring me about it. ill be leaving and going to uni in september anyway, i dont see the point

I have never had a job where my husband wasn't in the same building with me and I could go to him for help.
I guess I lucked out with that arrangement. Having a job without him around to protect me (from my anxieties) would be terrifying. I am sliding into retirement now with just a few years to go, working part time in the office of the school where he is principal. If the phone rings and he is available, I let him answer. I hate talking on the phone. I just put numbers into the Quick Books program on the office computer, that's all I feel confident doing alone and even with that, I am constantly double, triple checking myself afraid I am making a mistake. For those of you looking for a job where you don't have too much interaction with other people, you might consider learning Quick Books, or some other sort of accounting program. I fell into this job because the lady that had it before me was caught embezzling money and was arrested. I got the book Quick Books for Dummies, and I had a friend who knew Quick Books spend two days teaching me. I guess that's one thing my brain was able to learn quickly.

Yeah I'm one of those horror stories.
I've had a few jobs over the years but they've all been horrible.
I may have found some idea as to why if that would help you though - I'm alexithymic and thus, my choices about which jobs to go for were nothing but logic - The area had a need for employees not an excess, it was a reasonable amount of time and money to train for it, job was guaranteed at the end of training, it was local, it was a professional job with long term prospects, it was morally worthwhile, it was useful, I was capable of it - I used all these sorts of reasons to justify going into all sorts of jobs.
But it all fell apart essentially because I hated it, was attacked by all kinds of emotional stimuli I couldn't understand or deal with or name. I learned you had to take emotions into account and I was failing to do that because I can't comprehend them.
It's the old adage of finding a job you love. Something you want to do every day. I'm in the process of doing that now, and trying to push against the logic of 'do it because you'll be able to find work, its worthwhile a job, you can help people,' etc etc. Need to do something that positively engages the emotions in my view, then, it won't be a chore.

I used to be very scared to have a full time job but now that I have one, it's actually not that bad.

I was really into video games before. I liked the excitement of fast paces action games. Now I just think of work like that. I try to see how fast I can do it. I make a game out of it.

Sure my job is hard but I like to play games on hard difficulty so what's the difference?

I mean, a video game is just a series of tasks. e.g. make Link go from A to B to C to D. A job is just the same except you get paid for it.

A job is kind of like playing World of Warcraft except more useful. Either way you sit in front of a computer and click on stuff.

I work as a cleaner, which is the kind of job middle-class kids like me are supposed to die rather than end up in. I suspect it suits me a lot better than a respectable office job would. The application process wasn't even a tenth as hard, as they had low expectations. I have no responsibilities other than to get my own work done, and the supervisors aren't on my back the whole time. The woking hours are antisocial, but at least it's not the kind of job you "take home with you." I can forget about it when I'm not there.

I am seriously terrified of doing job applications, especially the form-filling stage. (There's something about forms. Worse than handling tarantulas.) I've done various placements, which did remove some of the fear of the work itself as I learned that people who do have "proper" jobs aren't so scarily competent after all. But I found the office envrionment exhausting and wearing on the nerves even for 2-3 hours a day.