So difficult

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Any decent man would dig a woman who likes Tolstoy. If she is pretty, a double bonus.

I saw a movie called “Puzzle.” The woman was in a mismatched marriage. She had some hidden genius in math, is shy and feminine. He’s a blue-collar guy, somewhat crude, who liked her in the kitchen only.

She’s a woman whom I had a crush on because of that genius, not despite it.

So you're saying that you're still in contact with him?

Yes. We have friends in common and see each other from time to time.

Quote: "It's difficult to give up on someone who keeps sending mixed messages"

Tolstoy wrote that if there is real love, there will be some "sub-text". Could be just the fact that someone is coming again and again to meet you (if there's some consistency in it?)
Good luck making up your mind about that. Difficult as it is. ASP people miss negative just as much as positive signals, looking at the past I see a wasteland of stupid actions, overlooking negative signals, both as missed opportunities, overlooking positive signals (and I'll tell you, these last ones hurt most)

There was, but he must have changed his mind...

Time to move on.

"Time to move on"

Good luck to that.
Sometimes Forwardness defeats Nostalgia, sometimes it doesn't, at least 50% chance I guess

Ahem, I met someone else already which never ever happens to me.



Rebound? Or something real? Who knows?

I do like him a lot though. This feels real, but I always say that and it never is.

Good luck for you in this case
in this world there exists an awful lot of unluck but also of an awful lot of happiness

Good luck =)

This thread makes me think of some other difficult love stories
I really liked to read Thomas Hardy's books "Tess of the d'Urbevilles" and "Far from the madding crowd", the last title is almost a definition of being "unhappy but still feeling fine"

These things are not easy, here's just another try at it:

https://medium.com/@gerbentue/more-sad- ... 00b34de219

I don't know what I want to reach with it, perhaps just some light at the end of the tunnel

Ah, I have several books on my bookshelf I have yet to read and Far From the Madding Crowd is one of them. I've seen the film adaptation. I'm looking for a farmer Oak.

Yes she did fall for the wrong person at first. And when I fall for someone I do think of the first guy in that story, the wrong one and wonder if I'm just falling for a charade.

Maybe I have found my farmer Oak. This is one of the few times I have not been worried about falling for the wrong one. It's like standing on level ground for once.

"Horrible old bores" not so much, but certainly much more interested in "settling down" than just having fun and enjoying life with a partner. I'm on several dating sites, and there really is a trend of women 25 and up putting in their profile things like "now I'm done with dating, looking for man to build family" or "we will date for one (1!) year, but then I want kids and a house in the countryside."

You're done with dating? Well, I'm just starting, so excuse me if I'll respect your plans by moving on and seeing if there's someone that seems to be more compatible with mine.

"We will date for one year and then..." aka "I am looking for a doormat."

Run, run away!

Biological clocks are ticking!!