Believe in Yourself or you need to believe in yourself more!

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cubedemon6073
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23 May 2022, 7:31 pm

ezbzbfcg2 let me add to what you said. How many contestants on American Idol believed in themselves and their abilities only to not only lose but be ripped to shreds?

Maybe believing in oneself is a factor or it is not but in the end it is other players who have a say as well no matter if it is a contest, a job interview or even a romantic relationship.

In the end, does the interviewer believe in me? Do the judges in the contest believe I won based upon their criteria they set up and do they always follow their own criteria? In a potential date does the other party desire to continue to pursue if you desire to pursue? The answers to these questions may be a no whether I believe in myself or not.

At the end of the day how much did it really matter whether I believed in myself or not? My answer: Not a whole hell of alot.



cubedemon6073
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23 May 2022, 7:41 pm

Here's the thing. A person's attitude doesn't exist in a vacuum. Their attitude towards themselves and abilities has to come from somewhere. How did it form and develop?

If you want to fix a person's attitude then one has to fix the cause(s). One has to go to the underlying problem(s).

Same thing with a positive attitude. Where did their positivity come from? How did they develop a positive attitude? Do they have underlying issues themselves? Do they get more supports and help then those with a negative attitude? Do things come easier for them?

You can't fix a person's negative attitude using this new age garbage that exists.



kraftiekortie
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23 May 2022, 8:24 pm

There’s nothing “new age” about me.



cubedemon6073
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23 May 2022, 8:42 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
There’s nothing “new age” about me.


Of course not Kraftie. You are a young, fit and healthy man.



kraftiekortie
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23 May 2022, 9:16 pm

I’m pretty old, actually…..



cubedemon6073
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23 May 2022, 10:40 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I’m pretty old, actually…..


Ah! Come on! You're not that old!



kraftiekortie
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23 May 2022, 10:59 pm

I’m 61. Almost elderly :D



cubedemon6073
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24 May 2022, 12:19 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I’m 61. Almost elderly :D


Nah! You're 61 years young lol :D :D



cubedemon6073
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24 May 2022, 10:36 pm

Here is an example of what I'm talking about.

Even though I'm employed in China more then likely I will not be able to obtain employment in the USA due to the nature and inherent requirements of the workplace.

I want to be able to learn how to play the stock market to see if I can get income that way when I eventually have to go back to the USA. But there are two things stopping me.

1. Understanding it conceptionally and all of the technical lingo and how the whole thing really works.

2. My motivation to learn.

For #1, I do have a possible solution and that is I have bought an online book for Kindle that is called Stock Investing for dummies. <<<This is one possible solution.

For #2, My motivation levels have been way down to even bother to try. Maybe it is depression. And, maybe it's because I don't see the point to anything. Or, maybe I'm just sick of society's BS in trying to force me to be positive which is fake by the way instead of it being genuine.

Or, maybe I have this extreme desire to fight certain people (i.e. conservatives) who's values hold us back because they want to cut funding to things like Voc Rehab or they believe in this stupid idea of pull yourself by your own bootstraps.

It feels like I'm struggling to climb a wall. It feels like I'm struggling against a society who holds certain values which hold us back and these values are inconsistent with each other and these people supposedly are Christians yet capitalism and free enterprise is their god instead of Jesus Christ who says to uplift the poor, downtrodden, etc.

The truth of the matter is personal responsibility as it stands in the USA is unjust, unfair, inequitable and unreasonable. It demands one to make the perfect decisions in all circumstances and everything is considered your fault in the USA no matter the prevailing circumstances.

How do I get past all of this? If I can't change the system with reason and logic (even though positivity says I can) then how do I get past this and simply ignore all of the tripe so I can be more productive?



kraftiekortie
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25 May 2022, 6:50 am

I’m glad you found your niche.

Have you traveled much in China? Forgive me if I've asked you that already.

One good thing about Beijing: they have cold winters----but spring there comes in March, rather than April. The summers are steaming, though, worse than NYC.



cubedemon6073
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25 May 2022, 10:15 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I’m glad you found your niche.

Have you traveled much in China? Forgive me if I've asked you that already.

One good thing about Beijing: they have cold winters----but spring there comes in March, rather than April. The summers are steaming, though, worse than NYC.


No, we haven't been able to travel to much because of the pandemic. Whole cities are shut down like Shanghai.

When I do come back to the USA at some point I'm going to fully tell my experiences because when it comes to China I do have to watch what I say here.

About Beijing, it is extremely cold. It is a biting cold.



kraftiekortie
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25 May 2022, 10:19 am

I bet you're absolutely fluent in Mandarin now!



cubedemon6073
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25 May 2022, 10:22 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I bet you're absolutely fluent in Mandarin now!


Honestly, I only know two words.

This is the pinyin version. Ni Ha means hello.

Shi Shi means thank you.



cubedemon6073
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25 May 2022, 10:25 am

China's culture is extremely different then American culture. The main difference is that China has a saving face culture.

This will tell you more.

https://www.teachingnomad.com/blog/chin ... face-mean/

But, this is only the tip of the ice berg.

If we aspies were a culture we would be considered an extremely low context culture.

All of this bantering back and forth that we aspies and americans do would be considered losing face in Chinese culture.



Last edited by cubedemon6073 on 25 May 2022, 10:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

kraftiekortie
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25 May 2022, 10:27 am

My opinion is that you should seek to learn more of the language.

Were I in your situation, I probably wouldn't acquire fluency----I would shoot for merely the ability to do things like order food and have basic conversations.

Yep.....it's very much a matter of "personal dignity" there. Thanks for the link.



cubedemon6073
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08 Oct 2023, 8:38 pm

I know it has been a year but I kind of want to open this back. I did try to learn the Chinese language but Chinese people are able to make sounds that I can't make. To give reason why I can't learn to speak it is because some of sounds that are used to speak it require one to have a deeper upper jaw. I don't have that so I can't move my tongue a certain way that I guess a number of people can.

What does positivity say to do about this? How would believing in myself help me with this?

And, by the time I'm done with work I'm exhausted. I just want to go home and crash. What do I do about this? What does positivity and believing in myself say to do about this? Simply, muddle my way through like I'm climbing a difficult mountain? I tried that. How would I get past my exhaustion to be able to do it especially if at times I can barely keep myself awake? Believing in myself and positivity and having positive attitude does not tell me what I can do.

Let's say my motivation is due to lack of desire and I don't want certain things as some people out there have claimed and I don't want these things bad enough. So, how would I have the desire to well have the desire exactly?

How would you will yourself to desiring something if one doesn't desire it? How does that even make sense?