I am constantly sabotaging myself.

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Lost_dragon
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30 May 2019, 6:11 pm

So, I might be a bit of a hypocrite. I give advice on how to deal with low self-confidence, but I suffer from it randomly sometimes. Although, I still follow my own advice, because it does help, it doesn't stop it completely though. I don't think it ever will.

One of my worst traits is that I tend to sabotage my own success. It'll go like this:

Me: Hey, I'm going to take the time to learn this skill more.

Also me: You can't do this.

Me: Well, not at first, but it takes time.

*Some time passes*

Also me: Face it, you're a freaking joke. Give up, you'll never be good.

Me: If I just-

Also me: Be realistic, you ruin everything. Why would this be any different?

Me: ...

Then I step back from the situation, and try to keep it in perspective. I remind myself...

Lost_dragon wrote:

- Is the criticism I'm giving myself constructive?

No? If so, why is not constructive? Perhaps it's too vague, or it's unreasonable.

Yes? That's good. You have something to work with.

- Would I allow someone else to speak to me like this?

No? That's a sign that you're speaking to yourself in an unhealthy manner. You shouldn't treat yourself as if you are worth less than others. If you would object to a bully saying the same things about you, then you should also object to yourself saying the same things. What is the true cause of these thoughts?

Yes? Apply the first question. Is it both constructive, and acceptable from someone else?

- Also, would it be alright to say these remarks to another person?

So, if you were to speak to someone in a similar position to you, would it be OK to say those comments to them? How might they react?



which helps, but it is annoying going through this process so much. I know I should try to cut back on it from the start, but it isn't always easy. The frustrating part about it all is that I don't improve because I don't think I can, so as a result I stay the same and it's a never ending self-fulfilling cycle. :wall: I'm trying to break it, and I do for a while. Then it comes back, ruining the fun and killing my motivation.


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kraftiekortie
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30 May 2019, 6:48 pm

Despite all this, you will be successful.

Many successful people are very hard on themselves.

I'm not really hard on myself. I've only attained a little bit of success in my life.



Lost_dragon
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31 May 2019, 5:53 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Despite all this, you will be successful.

Many successful people are very hard on themselves.

I'm not really hard on myself. I've only attained a little bit of success in my life.


Perhaps you're right. Although the future is a malleable, uncertain thing at times. Success isn't clear-cut. I think that what you have achieved is admirable, based on what I know. :)


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