Why do I even bother asking for help?

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Ok,

So as some of you know I had issues due to a shooting and then break in to my unit.

My Mom could have died.

Basically I had no help after all of that for the most part. Even someone who claimed to be a good friend did not care that much. She was clearly in it to make me more anxious and be entertained by all of it. I dumped her as a friend after that.

And then this weekend I wrote an email to my therapist asking for a letter saying what I have been through. I had mentioned this before in session.

She never said she could not write a letter until she replied in an email today (which is surprising since it is the weekend).

Like, why not tell me that sooner? Like clearly and outright?

All of this just makes me want to not even bother helping anyone else because almost no one cared about my Mom and I after we were traumatized.

Like I cannot even find a reason to not be cold hearted anymore. Or even pretend to be.

I'm sorry all that happened to you.

If you will continue to work with this therapist, I think it would be important to let her know how disappointed and unsupported her action made you feel - especially since she had not mentioned her stance earlier.

I no longer expect very much from people, so I am pleasantly surprised to receive anything at all. But I know I can't remove myself from people entirely, because I still need a lot of help.

I'm sorry as well. To be honest I don't know of therapists being permitted to write letters, or to describe or situations to a third party other than a court of law, or for medical records. I thought it was a non-disclosure issue for privacy, and because it's not their place to intervene in matters outside of confidential treatment. Whenever I've started with a new therapist I have to sign that I understand the disclosure policies.

That being said I wish she had informed you of this the first time.