I'm considering leaving Christianity

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Am getting the impression by your question that you already have answered your own question.

It feels like your intent is to pick apart the meaning of what I wrote …… please just take it for the words and concept it was meant to represent .

Back on track, please folks!

The last bunch of posts aren't very helpful to the OP. Please refer to her original post and if there are related side issues that other members want to discuss between themselves, consider using PMs.

Thanks.

It must be really tough to be told by your own parents that they believe that God doesn't want you. Sometimes belief blinds people to the ones around them, and disroots them from the reality they live in and the connections that are so precious, the needs their dear ones have.

We are selfish beings, we hide behind beliefs and make hateful mistakes. It's so easy to judge other people and assume we're always right and better. We hurt one another and in the end it's not belief that matters. It's relationship. It's love and hard work.

You can be religious or you can be without religious beliefs, we don't choose what we believe. We can't just say there's something that makes no sense to us. We can't say we can jump a big chasm even if we want to because we have seen we couldn't, and others couldn't and we understand how far we can leap. We have to accept truth above all else, even if we want to believe otherwise.

No matter the faith we have or the belief we have, it can't stop us being ourselves. There are good and bad people across all religions and lack thereof. It can't stop us from having values, and sticking to them. Because we know what good is as it brings good outcome in the world. We know what is to be treasured.

When I was really small, I had my first faith questions and did some thinking, and even doubted some things I was being told. Later I was really uncomfortable with people trying to make me do things that I didn't want to do and I started crying because I felt forced. It didn't feel good. It wasn't just my family which were always setting uncomfortable and disturbing rules but also we had forced classes in school from a certain religion of which for my parents religion it was a sin to do those things.
The pressure of belief can be really hard to go through. We just want to be ourselves but there are all these different rules, different expectations, different gods and religions, different beliefs. People can do dangerous things with them. Belief is best when it's free, when we can think it, and make our own minds. Everyone builds their own god, it really doesn't matter in the end, even though I know you really want and need to find your path and you will remember this time in your life, as the first step, I think it's important, but the things we ultimately do last and create change in the world. I think that is what separates us from blindness of belief and that is what brings us closer to love, whether it's self love or love for others. We cannot live in lies.

Yes we're children but we're not those people, we have our own minds, feelings, hearts. Different doesn't mean less. And you can prove it to yourself. You are good, functional and no less. Unblinded people see it.

_________________
My Pepe Le Skunk. I have so much faith in our love for one another. Thanks for being an amazing partner. x

Any topic, PM me; mind my profile.

What denomination are you? (Branch of Christianity).

By the way, people can't control feelings, they come as results of conscious and subconscious thoughts, other's behavior and its interpretation, individual mental wirings and environment adjustations and learned coping.

When people see each other and love each other for who they are they understand that it's not a poetry, it doesn't come black and white like words in a book. Trust, love, belief, feeling doesn't come automatically, it is earned, it is seeked, it is built. Then, as it grows, you might start to feel the depth of peace, love and freedom, and all the things your belief gifts you. The passion and awe of standing within the truth of your found belief and your own thoughts. And maybe frustration and upset towards some things that deserve it.

_________________
My Pepe Le Skunk. I have so much faith in our love for one another. Thanks for being an amazing partner. x

Any topic, PM me; mind my profile.

When I pray , I feel sometimes like I'm just in a room whispering to myself.
When I go to prayer meetings we all pray together and people say God has given them a message.

I've had it happen several times, someone will say there is a message for me, it reflects what I've been concerned about or what I thought I was supposed to be doing.

You're only 14 so you probably can't attend those meetings until you're eighteen or so.
In the mean time , have you asked God to show you how he feels about you?

For what it's worth (the choice was all mine and not from my parents),

I went from Christian to Atheist and then to something akin to Christian philosophy. I found much of the philosophy and morals I agreed with ended up being held within Christianity when I decided to read the Bible on my own as I was in a hospital for some months; I do have trouble with things I consider supernatural, but that's just me. Not part of any specific denomination (I went to Catholic schools), and I guess many wouldn't consider me Christian even though I walk that narrow path. The connection I have is with the words. They helped me, and I'm loyal to those that do.

I guess read it yourself and make your own choice?