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dorkseid
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17 Apr 2022, 5:35 pm

Pepe wrote:

If your parents are still alive, wouldn't it be better to choof off *after* they go?
You would be saving them a lot of grief that way.


My parents are abusive as*holes and I despise them.



Pepe
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17 Apr 2022, 6:15 pm

dorkseid wrote:
Pepe wrote:

If your parents are still alive, wouldn't it be better to choof off *after* they go?
You would be saving them a lot of grief that way.


My parents are abusive as*holes and I despise them.


Now, I remember you saying that.
Are you saying they wouldn't care if you lived or died?



Jakki
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17 Apr 2022, 6:48 pm

I would miss your postings here dorkseid .! Have found you actually subtlety interesting as a person/ poster .
Often , have found some of your posts demonstrate depth and a cognitively aware person .
Often this can be hard to find in persons . If even just from the posts , I have read here. And I had no idea you had a degree in teaching . Much less Special Ed types . Kinda makes me wonder if even at your age ? If You have fullfilled your purposes on this planet yet .? Time is on your side . May good graces follow you , whichever way, you eventually choose to go .


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Earthbound_Alien
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18 Apr 2022, 2:14 am

no sweetheart

talk to me



Mona Pereth
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18 Apr 2022, 4:07 pm

dorkseid wrote:
My 40th birthday is in May. I've decided I'm going to end my life before then. My mind is made up and I will not be persuaded otherwise.

If you don't want to be persuaded otherwise, what is your aim in posting about it here? What kind of feedback do you expect or want?


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AnonymousAnonymous
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18 Apr 2022, 6:31 pm

Don't kill yourself.


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Pepe
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18 Apr 2022, 9:36 pm

dorkseid wrote:

It's student loan debt, which won't go away even if I file for bankruptcy. I don't know how things work in Australia, but we have a huge student debt crisis over here.


Is this of interest to you?

viewtopic.php?f=21&t=405369#p9019406



Rexi
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19 Apr 2022, 2:24 pm

dorkseid wrote:
Mountain Goat wrote:
Don't kill yourself. You are needed.


If that's true, then explain why nobody would ever give me a decent job even though I've had a university degree since 2008. Explain why no woman has ever wanted to date me unless it was just to take advantage of my disabilities.

You're not alone. Many people here are dealing with the same things. Even people who arent on the spectrum struggle with job find, regardless of less educated people getting the job. Corruption is high.
You and I share many of the same mental ideas, and they are very unique. I dont get as annoyed when you write.
Have you tried going back on the dating scene again? I think last time thats what I thought is best for development towards your goals.


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klanka
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19 Apr 2022, 5:19 pm

I have similarities to yourself in that my only long term relationship with a woman was abusive and therefore wasn't even real.

See the thread I started about life being a cruel joke?

I've had suicidal ideation since I was a teenager, I always had some hope things would turn around , but now it has mostly gone.



dorkseid
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19 Apr 2022, 7:50 pm

Pepe wrote:
Are you saying they wouldn't care if you lived or died?


No. I'm saying I don't care what they think.



dorkseid
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19 Apr 2022, 11:37 pm

One day, I'll be too old to work. I won't have any money. And I won't have any children or family to take me in. I won't be able to pay rent, or to afford a caregiver. I'll be sickly, impoverished, and with nobody to take me in or anywhere to go.



Pepe
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20 Apr 2022, 1:38 am

dorkseid wrote:
One day, I'll be too old to work. I won't have any money. And I won't have any children or family to take me in. I won't be able to pay rent, or to afford a caregiver. I'll be sickly, impoverished, and with nobody to take me in or anywhere to go.


That would be the time to get "drastic", I would have thought.



Mona Pereth
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20 Apr 2022, 7:14 am

dorkseid wrote:
One day, I'll be too old to work. I won't have any money.

No money at all? Isn't there a retirement fund for teachers?

dorkseid wrote:
And I won't have any children or family to take me in. I won't be able to pay rent, or to afford a caregiver. I'll be sickly, impoverished, and with nobody to take me in or anywhere to go.

This happens to too many of us.

WE MUST ORGANIZE to build alternative extended families.


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kraftiekortie
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20 Apr 2022, 10:24 am

By the way, Dorkseid, what you said about the $5,000 student loan forgiveness for teachers is correct, of course. But you might be eligible for the Public Service Loan Forgiveness option, which is a total forgiveness.



Jakki
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21 Apr 2022, 4:53 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
dorkseid wrote:
One day, I'll be too old to work. I won't have any money.

No money at all? Isn't there a retirement fund for teachers?

dorkseid wrote:
And I won't have any children or family to take me in. I won't be able to pay rent, or to afford a caregiver. I'll be sickly, impoverished, and with nobody to take me in or anywhere to go.

This happens to too many of us.

WE MUST ORGANIZE to build alternative extended families.


^^^ Cliques ^^^. .?


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Slailie01
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21 Apr 2022, 7:16 am

Please...although you may not want to listen to reason.. here out a girl who has been in total suicidal issues from age 16, until my current age 29 in 3 days.

I know what its like to feel like you lack family, purpose, desire, reason, or even a girlfriend/boyfriend or sexual experiences.

I am not saying i invalidate your experiences by saying it gets better. but it REALLY does get better.

As a girl who suffers from autism, Borderline personality disorder, Major depressive disorder, and generalized anxiety disorder, ptsd and so much more..

I know what it is like to feel lost and hopeless.

Listen to Reason, there is always a way out, and it isnt by dying.

Check into a psychiatrics hospital until you can get yourself straight mentally, i say this kindly.

I had to go to a psych hospital 3 times in life, 4 if you count my toddler time in life.

It is scary at first but it really does help, and they can help you sort out your life and even get you medicine to help block the dark scary thoughts of depression or suicide.


As a girl who was raped and kidnapped at 19 in 2012 by a man she trusted online for over a year, beaten and broken , suffering PTSD from the event, running away 2 times in 3 years after the event, multiple scars from self harm over those 3 years from 2012-2016.

I know what its like to feel like theres no way out of the dark.

Im on disability so i wouldnt know about student loans or working , but i know what its like to feel hopeless in this workforce world, its scary and sucks.

As for Romantic life, Age is but a number. As long as the dates are above 18.

I am dating a man that will be 40 in october, he is disabled in a wheelchair, total almost loss of muscle control and trachea tube to breathe on a machine, and this man...brought me out of my darkness.

Dont say your life isnt worth it

you could have it much...much worse.

And dont dwell on what could be worse, because there will always be worse.

You need to focus on what you CAN ACHEIVE.

Get a job in a field you love, love your job, not the work it causes.

Start dating, bring your best face and personality and let it shine forward... a true lover will see you for you and want you .

Dont give up on life, for it is the greatest gift you have been given.

Good luck and i wish you the best , no matter what you choose.