Scared, upset and confused

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Ladysmokeater
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29 Feb 2008, 3:31 pm

For anyone that has read my last couple posts, you can skip the next paragraph and go onto the next one...
Back story: mother has been ill and will be in a wheelchair until about July. My dad has been being really hateful towards me and demading this and that in the care of my mom. My sisters (one local one far away) act like all the house work and other chores I am doing isnt enough. Im stressed so bad my hair is falling out, Im sick to my stomach and my bp is sky high. My dad isnt in great shape either, but still has to work the family business that I refuse to asssit with, after all I already work two jobs and do all the work I can around the house. we have asitter for mom 3-3.5 days a week. My sister (local) sits when she can, and I am home some evenings, and some mornings. but they complain that Im not doing enough (all but mom) and my sister (local) says that Im spending too much time with my boyfriend (he works a lot so the time we get together is little) and I should walk away from him and everything else Ive been doing (second job and Ive already given up volunteering) to be home more. After all, she says, she has a baby and has to work and gets no "me time" and so on..... My dad and I have fought so much that Im staying with the b/f for the last couple days to let myself cool down because the fights upset momma and I dont want to do that, she needs all the strength she has to get better....
OK here is the update
I found out yesterday that my dad has to have knee surgery next month and will be in a wheel chair for a bit, and should be on his feet in just 4 weeks. When mom told me I started laughing then crying and couldnt stop. She was like you are being rude and all that, but I just lost it. I dont think I can handle anything else. My sister from far way i comming for a month and I know that there will be hell to pay. She wants me to get rid of my pets since i dont have time for the m right now (a cat and a dog) actually she suggested putting the cat to sleep and she used to be my ali in family matters. What happened?! I dont even want to be near the house, my parents my sisters or anything related to them right now. I need space from the situation and still I have so much to do to help that I cant get far. My b/f thinks all we do is fight (it used to never be like this) and Im scared Im never going to get to break away because the guilt is drawing me back. Plus my dad keeps telling everyone that he cant get anyhelp and I wont do anything (yet the house is clean, his clothes are clean, groceries are bought, etc)
I just want to dissipear. I want to run away
what should I do
I cant handle not one more event. not one more



WilsonFisk
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29 Feb 2008, 6:38 pm

I think you've answered your own questions.

They know you have AS so they should be more sensitive to your needs too. Perhaps you should educate them even more on the difficulties your symptoms bring to you and how they could help. Especially your sisters.



Ladysmokeater
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01 Mar 2008, 2:11 pm

ah, the sisters. I tried to "educate" the far away one who insists (because her son is exactly like me) that its some "high IQ' syndrome not aspergers (because I talk alot). The other likes to tell people im a genius and swares she knew all along that Im an aspie. (it wasnt like that at all) they all know better its just a mess.
and yea I think I did answer my questions, Ive been still holding out hope that leaving isnt the answer that everything will go back to the way that it used to be...