Page 1 of 2 [ 32 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

nihilist_void
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 9 May 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 22

14 Jun 2006, 2:19 pm

I have this tendency to cry alot when things get overwhelming. I'm incredibly ashamed of it cuz it makes me look weak and girlish. Only problem is when I was younger I was never taught not to cry as a male because of the stigma behind it. Any other guys guilty of this?



jolger
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 5 Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 51
Location: Denmark??? XD

14 Jun 2006, 2:23 pm

Well yes i AM guilty of it... BUT i dont think males "shuldn't" cry... Sometimes it's just good TO cry... Dont know how to explain it but being "emotional" isn't "wrong"... I cried a lot when i was younger and yes i still cry a lot if things just are too overwhelming but i don't think that crying as a male is bad or anything... If you ask me it just proves that there actually IS some emotion in you...


_________________
Overall, you scored as follows:

2% scored higher (more nerdy), and
98% scored lower (less nerdy).

What does this mean? Your nerdiness is:

All hail the monstrous nerd. You are by far the SUPREME NERD GOD!! !


JohnnysEntertainmentFan
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 7 Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 44
Location: Melbourne FL

14 Jun 2006, 3:06 pm

I can definitely understand your viewpoint, but I respectfully disagree. I cry when I'm feeling a lot of hurt, sadness or whatever I need to feel. I see crying as a natural process of healing.

I am not certain (I am sure someone will correct me on this, and please do!), but I believe that experts say that we cry when we feel any intense emotion. This is why we we have 'happy tears' or whatever you would like to call it.

I also see crying as getting in touch with your emotions, which makes you a compassinate, feeling person! :)



lowfreq50
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 May 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,536
Location: Gainesville, Florida

14 Jun 2006, 4:02 pm

stop crying plz thx



stuckinthedesert
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 59
Location: California

14 Jun 2006, 4:25 pm

I think its ok to cry. I think there is a time and place for everything though. It seems that it is considered inappropriate for males to cry in public but ok in private. That’s the way I have always understood it.

My advice is to do what ever makes you feel better and don't care what anyone else thinks and if that’s a huge problem then just delay it till you can be in private.

I had the same problem when I was younger. I don't have that problem now mainly because when I look at the problem or problems that made me want to cry I don't see how crying will help so instead I look for solutions to the problems. Plus the male bravado drilled into most guys heads sense they can walk pretty much eliminated the ability to cry in public.

On second thought maybe you should not listen to me I am not the best person to be giving any advice. Just Ignore everything that comes from my mouth it seems to work for everyone else.
:lol:


_________________
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."


CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,554
Location: Stalag 13

14 Jun 2006, 4:42 pm

I find Emotional Males very sexy.



Fiz
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Jan 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,821
Location: Manchester, United Kingdom

14 Jun 2006, 5:18 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I find Emotional Males very sexy.


So do I because they actually admit they they have them as opposed to concentrating on 'being a man' i.e. being an as*hole. I find that when a man cries, its kinda heartbreaking because men don't cry for no reason. Women will cry at bloody anything but men do it for a genuine reason and I want to reach out to men who cry. Its not wimpy or girlish, its merely being honest about your feelings in a round about way and it is better to release some emotion than keep it bottled up. Why should men have to do that? Cos women certainly don't.


_________________
The only person in the world that can truly make you happy is yourself.


nihilist_void
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 9 May 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 22

14 Jun 2006, 6:46 pm

reason this is such a big deal to me is because I'm Asian and in the Asian culture if you're male and you cry then its considered disgraceful. I'm always ostracized for it. Yesterday there was a misunderstanding between me and the girl I am head over heals for (first relationship) and when I was under the impression she was leaving me, I started crying very heavily. When she called she already knew I had been crying and after we got done talking she told me how embarrassing it is to hear me cry.

I hated myself for it, especially since it was over a girl.



ethamin
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 12 Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 215
Location: Mundus vult decipi, ergo decipiatur

14 Jun 2006, 7:36 pm

The last time i cried someone gave me a bloody nose. Thankfully my dog grabbed him and he began to cry. If you have to cry, cry because you have a reason. Otherwise... what is the point of it! My mother says it is really unattractive, not just for boys but also for girls. I think that it is there and so it has to have a function. If you feel better afterwards... good for you. If you feel worse, than i think it is better to show a stiff upper lip and be proud of the fact that someone did not see your hurt. That is my problem, i always hide my pain. Who knows what is better.



synx13
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 175
Location: California Central Valley

14 Jun 2006, 10:53 pm

I wish I could cry. :( I used to cry a lot, but the pain got so bad that I just ran out of tears. I don't think it was a "male" thing though, more the sorry, sick state of the universe we're trapped in.



gsilver
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Apr 2006
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 646

15 Jun 2006, 12:18 pm

I have recently regained the ability to cry, and I consider it a major acomplishment.



Scrapheap
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,685
Location: Animal Farm

15 Jun 2006, 2:33 pm

nihilist_void wrote:
I have this tendency to cry alot when things get overwhelming. I'm incredibly ashamed of it cuz it makes me look weak and girlish. Only problem is when I was younger I was never taught not to cry as a male because of the stigma behind it. Any other guys guilty of this?


I'm the opposite. I used to be overly emotional as a kid and was bullied as a result. This made me numb. I have'nt shed a tear in almost a decade now.


_________________
All hail Comrade Napoleon!! !


Mork
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 31 Dec 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 179
Location: Preston, UK

15 Jun 2006, 3:24 pm

I cried when I found out about AS. I also get emotional when watching movies.

I don't feel ashamed of it - I am like I am



Fiz
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Jan 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,821
Location: Manchester, United Kingdom

15 Jun 2006, 3:46 pm

nihilist_void wrote:
reason this is such a big deal to me is because I'm Asian and in the Asian culture if you're male and you cry then its considered disgraceful. I'm always ostracized for it. Yesterday there was a misunderstanding between me and the girl I am head over heals for (first relationship) and when I was under the impression she was leaving me, I started crying very heavily. When she called she already knew I had been crying and after we got done talking she told me how embarrassing it is to hear me cry.

I hated myself for it, especially since it was over a girl.


In my mind, crying heavily when you think you are going to lose someone you have deep feelings for is a very natural reaction (for most, but I won't condemn those who don't) and it is absolutley nothing to be ashamed of. Its obviously natural for you and if this is how you feel you should not bottle it up, it will do you more harm than good in the long run. And as for your girlfriend, I think she may only be embarrassed to hear you cry because, when a man cries, it is usually over something very major and men don't cry very often. So when it does happen, some people don't know how to deal with it and I think this may have been the case with your girlfriend, I don't think she thinks badly of you for it.


_________________
The only person in the world that can truly make you happy is yourself.


TigerFire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Mar 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,904
Location: Cave Spring GA USA

15 Jun 2006, 4:12 pm

I cried before over a girl. Even then she wanted me not to cry because she didn't know how to react to it. I cry all the time but now these days sometimes I kind of been bored that I've been crying inside. It is lonely being isolated.


_________________
Beauty is in the eye of beholder but to a theif beauty is money.


LePetitPrince
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Mar 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,464

16 Jun 2006, 1:52 pm

Like nihilist i am from Asian culture , mid-easter to be more particular and like in most cultures a man who cries is something very view as shameful.

I was used to cry for major problems when I was child and teenager , I cried when I felt depression , I cried a bit (without real tears) during the civil war , for the massacre of Ambulance Mansouri and the Massacre of Kana during the invasion of Israel "Operation Grapes of Wrath", I cried when i failed once a class at school , I cried for many times for many reasons related to school.

But my cries are short and in private and mostly tearless , I never really grief . I never griefed , i couldn't grief during the funreal of my cousine 2 years ago I didn't drop a single tear , it s kinda creepy but I couldn't . I don't know if this related to HFA but this is my case .