How do you stop liking your friend?

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Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 4:25 pm

Grr. I just wrote a message, and it got deleted! So here it goes again... :x

My internet friend doesn't like me anymore. :( We've talked the past 2 years, every night pretty much, sometimes for like, 6 hours. And now he hardly talks to me. He's found a new female internet friend. And I think she's replaced me. All I know is she lives in the same country as him, is weird (which he likes), and asexual like he claims to be. So I guess they click. :cry:
I liked him more than friends too, so it's harder, but it still would be even if I didn't. He doesn't like me back, and said it was because hes asexual. Before he knew we used to be really close though, he was one of my three best friends. :cry:
Now he hardly speaks to me, and forgets anything he says he'll do. I'm positive its because this asexual girl replaced me.
It makes me feel foolish caring too much. I'm crying even writing it.

How do I stop liking him as a friend and romantically and stop talking to him? We used to be really close and I was so happy. Now I only get depressed because of this. :cry: :cry: :cry:



Prosser
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13 Mar 2010, 4:31 pm

First off, are you genuinely sure He's forgotten about you? If he just speaks to you less often then you may be over reacting. If he has totally lost interest in you then just try not to talk to him and time will sort the rest out. Apparently.


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Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 4:34 pm

Prosser wrote:
First off, are you genuinely sure He's forgotten about you? If he just speaks to you less often then you may be over reacting. If he has totally lost interest in you then just try not to talk to him and time will sort the rest out. Apparently.


I probably am overreacting. I'm pretty positive he's my best friend, and I'm not his. That's an imbalance that I can't really bare. I hate how jealous I'm getting and stuff. And he doesn't care about me as much as I do about him. :(



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13 Mar 2010, 5:05 pm

I guess it comes down to whether you'd rather have him in you life as just a casual friend or not at all. Either put up with only conversing occationally or move on and completely block him from your life and try find someone else. From what I can see, these appear to be the two most realistic options.


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jawbrodt
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13 Mar 2010, 5:16 pm

I'm sure he still likes you, but as alot of guys do, he probably was getting a little bored, after talking every day for that length of time. Then he came across that new girls, and is addicted to the newfound excitement of something new. I suppose that sounds a little depressing, but it's a fact of life, just like married couples eventually fall into a lifestyle that isn't quite as exciting as it was for the first year or so, after being around each other so often. I think you might have to wait til the novelty of his newfound excitement wears off, and he is ready to chat regularly again. One of the best ways to forget about it, is to chat with someone else in the meantime. :)


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Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 5:20 pm

Ok, I've been a bad, bad person. :( I snooped on a website he goes on and found a topic about the situation!
He doesnt want me to like him anymore, so he's ignoring me and trying not to get very deep in conversations. I can't tell if he likes me a lot as a friend...or not....I'm honestly okay if he doesnt like me romantically! I'll get over it. but hes not acting like he was before he had any idea of me liking him. that was enough. now its not. :( I wish he would understand that...I'm ....Ugh. I can't lose him as a friend. That won't happen. And I'm sure I can get over him. But I can't take the ignoring....Or anything!! UGH. I'm being so problematic. :( I hate myself!
I'm sure he's deemed me too much work to bother with by now. :(



League_Girl
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13 Mar 2010, 5:22 pm

How come he doesn't want you to like him anymore?



Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 5:33 pm

League_Girl wrote:
How come he doesn't want you to like him anymore?

I...don't know. He says he's aromantic, now. So I guess the idea repulses him? Deary me, he's probably suspecting the worst about my affections for him. 8O
Why can't he just be as close as we were before? :( I was fine with one-sided attraction then. I'm not fine without my best friend now. :cry:
And he seems to think meeting over the summer is a bad idea, according to my snooping (slaps self)...I don't know how I would express this without being offensive...But I'm pretty positive I'll stop liking him romantically when I meet him. XD.



Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 5:35 pm

Stupid me, though. That was several months ago. He is closer to this asexual chick now, I'm sure. It isn't even because of the "romantic stuff" entirely either. I get jealous when my female IRL friends hang out with me less, too.



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13 Mar 2010, 5:52 pm

I was friends with somebody like that on the Internet, a long time ago. I've forgotten about it, and moved on. People are strange.


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Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 6:52 pm

I don't want to forget about it....:( I mean, I can't speak for myself in the future...But He's a really close friend. One of my three closest.



Ambivalence
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13 Mar 2010, 7:13 pm

Spazzergasm wrote:
My internet friend doesn't like me anymore. :( We've talked the past 2 years, every night pretty much, sometimes for like, 6 hours.


That level of contact would drive me insane, and I would have been trying to get away after a week or two. :? Even with a correspondent as charming as you undoubtedly are. :)

*sigh* That's not hypothetical, either. I'll spare you the tragic (seriously :cry: there's someone in heaven with a twisted sense of humour :evil: ) details, but being unable to take that pressure of contact led me to back away from contact with someone, though I liked her and cared for her very much. :?


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Postures
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13 Mar 2010, 7:15 pm

Have you tried talking to him about it or is he completely ignoring you?



Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 7:43 pm

Ambivalence wrote:
Spazzergasm wrote:
My internet friend doesn't like me anymore. :( We've talked the past 2 years, every night pretty much, sometimes for like, 6 hours.


That level of contact would drive me insane, and I would have been trying to get away after a week or two. :? Even with a correspondent as charming as you undoubtedly are. :)

*sigh* That's not hypothetical, either. I'll spare you the tragic (seriously :cry: there's someone in heaven with a twisted sense of humour :evil: ) details, but being unable to take that pressure of contact led me to back away from contact with someone, though I liked her and cared for her very much. :?


See, it normally drives me insane, too! I love all you WP people :), but whenever someone attempts to get too close, it completely makes me step back. :( Same with any other internet friends...Real life ones, too.
*sigh* he's different. :(
Sorry about the girl. :( Did she start creepig you? Or was it just the amount of time?


Postures wrote:
Have you tried talking to him about it or is he completely ignoring you?

Well, we still talk...It's just gotten so listless. The conversation dies after the initial hellos and stuff. No longer happy engaged conversations or hugs. :(



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13 Mar 2010, 7:55 pm

the strange wisdom of jim morrison-

people are strange
when you're a stranger
faces look ugly
when you're alone

[wo]men seem wicked
when you're unwanted
streets are uneven
when you're down

when you're strange,
faces come out of the rain-
when you're strange,
no one remembers your name

when you're strange.


but you're NOT strange so DO try harder to put these worrying things out of your mind. you have to live your OWN life and other folk have to live THEIR own lives as well. there is more than one fish in the sea. lots of other clichés but you get the picture.



Spazzergasm
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13 Mar 2010, 8:00 pm

What can I do to put them out of my mind?