What's on your mind right now?

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A need to finish a series of online employment applications for a large retail chain.

Every day is just lying around waiting for the other shoe to drop




All the schools that took me, expelled

Jobs, redundant

Friends, dumped

Bathrooms, exhausted




Graceful degradation

Making coffee

What shall I do this evening? I strugged through a partial shutdown this morning. I recovered though and managed to make a start sorting a few things. So many things need sorting out. I tend to just dump things down when I am not feeling up to much... So things accumilate which need my attention. Finally though, I have made a start.

Just put one hoof in front of t' other, young mountain goat ... You'll get there. Evenings are the best this time of year .... love the autumn ...

All is dark outside. If I go for a walk I would close my eyes so I don't see the dark.

Edit: Sky is not quite dark as it is still orange where the sun has gone down in the west.

We'd be the blind leading the blind, then .... Pitchforks and Torches ?
I used to love going on moonlight hikes by torchlight in Aus ... in a place called Esk ... the starts would be so bright!

Looking forward to gender clinic Thursday

Wierd I am such a lame loser that I look forward to medical appointment

Right now that is the only thing that I have to anticipate positively



Did not bring a social security card to job interview

Usually they don't ask


Now I have to email a copy


The library has a scanner

Can't find library card

Farce


The bus comes every half hour and takes half hour


That stupidass b***h acted like it was reasonable to demand I go back tomorrow




Drug test negative

Background check cleared

She gave me a copy of drug test

Show to Dr Butler

Dr Butler put "illicit drug use:. Denies"





Physical evidence

s**t I don't do drugs and here's documentation


They believe whatever the f**k they want


Then they expect you to believe whatever they tell you

Wondering how a friend's day went.

I really wish I wasn't so dang tired all the time. This is due to chronic insomnia issues, and I've had a heck of a time just finding some way for me to get any sleep at all. My sleep hygiene is pretty good, I take melatonin and Trazodone, and I still sleep poorly. Recently I tried Ambien, and it did nothing for me. I'm both literally and figuratively so tired of this.

if this weather keeps up as it has, it might get a bit depressing.

Work, friends, all kinds of things. My dad, my dog. I feel like a lot gets blamed on me at work even if I feel like it’s my fault. My friends and I get along, but are some worth hangin on too, being so attached too. I love my dad and my dog dearly. Want to spend more time with them and will start trying.

I really want to get out of my city (and state) but still don't really have a viable way of doing that

That undergraduate-level education is definitely a couple of levels above the high-school level most people are taught, and is difficult enough that most people wouldn't be able to do it, but is still itself somewhere around mass-produced kindergarten-level for the people who work in those fields and are actually finding out genuinely new things.

Part of it is looking at how far back in history a piece of knowledge was discovered. High school - things like math and science in particular - teach stuff which has been known for centuries, if not millennia. Undergraduate classes might bring you up to only one or two centuries ago. Postgraduate work may allow you to dip into things which (sometimes) were discovered in living memory. It's really only with doctorate-level and postdoc work that you get a chance to work with things from the present generation.

Other areas, like media/culture (and sometimes business), have a far greater chance of referencing things from the past few years. Even then, there's often a huge swathe of things from previous centuries to learn as a base for most of it.

Also: formal education with its nigh-unyielding curriculum schedules may not be the greatest learning environment for people whose capacities vary significantly due to medical, financial, or circumstantial issues. With the ability to shift much of the learning to digital sources and interactivity, I wonder if at least low-level testing could be partially automated enough to allow it to take place more often, allowing students to self-pace more easily. It's not just autistics who have good and bad days, or areas of focus - it's people who have all kinds of medical conditions, varying levels of pain, and have things like employment or family duties to try and work around. It'd be nice to be able to self-pace learn for pretty much the entire educational track, kindergarten through postgrad, via the internet, mix remote learning with in-person options on an as-needed basis, and take tests/exams on a more personal schedule.

Reminders... I might've need some reminders. Not the annoying kinds, just... Reminders.


Thought I found a reminder that might've suit me well since it relates. Those who needed the messages? I can relate to many of them to some extent.

Only to find out... It's a message not meant for me.

A part of me became very doubtful, but another part of me accepts and knew what to feel and think otherwise.


The former is just a hungry part of me who just remains confused and would want anything to be identified with for comfort's sake. So I thought that message is also meant for me, along with those who might've. That former part of myself is the part of me who wanted to be unique and be in a unique collective in any form.
The latter knew it is not necessary, for I'm already a part of the world and it's existence.

Instead, I'd want others to let it hear it; especially those who are meant to have the message.
The message to who are meant to spread love and acceptance on a certain ways and angles.
And the fact that it can be done with another, not necessarily exclusive for those with certain traits, that anyone can have their own ways of doing it right.

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