What's on your mind right now?

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New and improved worry about my pets.

Those "expired" antibiotics I took for the gum laceration ended up clearing up my chronic sinus stuff, so now I'm sneezing far too much. Antihistamines sorta help, so yeah. This is what happens when you don't bother with symptoms you experience and leave them be. I put up with things because I always have (a few reasons there). My left eye now, for example, where it's easier to keep it closed when looking at the computer screen, might be fixed with some strategic application of silicone or whatever they do from a professional, but I put up with things because that's who I am.

Don't be like me is on my mind. As some things end up being unable to be fixed if you leave them go on.

I read with one eye too! ^ I used to shut my left pre-stroke but now it's either one.

I like rain but hate thunder.

IsabellaLinton,

Sorry about your stroke there (I recall you mentioning it some months back).

Mine is from tissue breakdown, so ptosis/weakness. Parry-Romberg. I can keep it about half open outside of reading range, then it's closed. It'll likely go fully closed in about a year or so I guess (seems to have hit my eye and one specific area of my cheek the most, with the rest mild/spared). Could be somewhat fixed, but...me (don't be like me, because me an idiot).

Which I guess brings back things on my mind. I like blue skies though, so I'll think of them instead; even though there's none outside in the sky.

Dearest Dill,

I've actually had two strokes. For my whole life prior to the first one, I had two lazy eyes. I can move them independently if I want to. Don't worry it's not very noticeable so I'm not freaky-looking or anything. During and after my first stroke I had severe Ptosis on my left eye as well as Diplopia (double vision). I also had something called a Third Nerve Palsy on my left eye. They almost did surgery on my eye muscles but I forget why we opted against it. I had to go for Visual Retraining and wear a patch, followed by thick prism lenses. I couldn't drive for four years and I could read but it was very difficult. Now that my eyes are better I still have two lazy eyes and I read with one of them shut just like before, no matter how strong my prescription gets.

Random: I was a lazy turd today.

I'm feeling sick with stomach issues after being ill for a week, and am now becoming anxious about medical issues.

getting more work done now in the evening, and how normal folks get their work done in the mornings.

Me too. Waiting for sunset works far better for me because I get more energy.

isn't that interesting that our energy comes later in the day rather than right away, as though it has to warm up first.

IsabellaLinton,

Naturally, as I mentioned one, you've suffered two. I really need to just stop talking. I recall that you did indeed mention more than one in The Haven. Sorry for your 2nd one all the same. I should probably stop talking now for obvious reasons though. I guess I'm superstitious. I've never cared what people look like, which will no doubt make people feel like I think they're ugly or something, but it's never that. It's good that you're an actual smart human and went through with the treatment, and you've experienced the relief it offers. I don't really need to use my left eye anymore for anything, so I'm kinda cool. It's just the one side too (my right eye is the good one of the two when it comes to vision). If it affected both, I'd definitely get it fixed, as I wouldn't be able to help someone and keep promises made.

Nothing as extravagant as a stroke here, just a simple blow to the face decades ago, or so they say. Could also be autoimmune.

blue skies still on my mind. Emotional synesthesia things I guess; I find comfort there. Regardless of the darkness, I still see brightness.

everyone thinks ameikkka is going down the toilet, at least that is the impression I get from reddit posters outside the U.S. I kind of hate it like the pity of 'oh you're american, I'm sorry' Like talkinig of universal heatlcare and 'oh yeah you americans don't get that, can't imagine what it would be like to be in America with health issues. Like people from other countries are using this country as a bad example. It's like a joke among disabled people who aren't American' ha ha at least you're not in america where they have no healthcare.

Just saying we are kind of a laughing stock at this point.

Thank you Dill. ^^ The second one didn't affect my eyesight. It's only lasting effect is that my intellectual brain feels like mush. I can't think or critique the way I once would. I've lost my "edge" and my stamina in academic work because of brain fog, mental lethargy, and increased difficulty with linear thought. You'll notice my paragraphs aren't well structured and I seem half-baked most of the time. Blame Stroke 2 for that.

I'm glad you're comfortable with single-eye vision. The only benefit to two eyes is depth perception. I'm sure you've learned some work-arounds because you seem to get a lot done each day.

No worries. Sorry for you there too, and it's not easy losing things one once had, nor does it ever really get any easier. Your writing and paragraphs seem pretty good to me, though I'm betting you'll need to put in far more effort to get to where you are. As long as we can get our point across, that'll be the important thing in this world. Sticklers for these things that hit our self-esteem can enjoy their nitpicking. Me confuse past present future and objects singular or held by multiples, and the paper burns or hard-drive crashes all the same.

Thanks. Yeah, I adapt, which is probably one of the few things I'm decent enough with. Unless it's necessary, I'll tend to just take it as it comes, kinda like how I never had my right hand repaired a few years back and it's sorta gammy now, but I'm left-handed and it can still hold weight, so it's fine (too late to get that one fixed, which will be one of those, don't be like Dill things regardless of the ailment).

Finding it funny how after trying out many a stitching technique, what I originally did, which is functionally a continuous suturing technique but with far tighter intervals per stitch, is the best to me. What works works, I guess.

I had a joke about universal healthcare but Americans won't get it.

Writing.