14 Jun 2020, 6:08 am
Can I ask the same with sexuality and romantic preferences??
Are asexuals all fundamentally sex-repulsed?
Are aromantics dislike and avoid romance?
Hmph.Well, I can say that I classify myself as asexual and am not sex-repulsed. It’s perfectly fine if other people want to do it, and I’ll even put up with a quick sex scene or two in a movie (so long as the rest of it is interesting in some way), I just personally don’t have any urge to do it.
I am now unsure whether what I feel for a friend is romantic love or not, so I don’t know whether to call myself aromantic or demi-romantic, but I can say that I am not completely put off by romance, but I do wish it was less prevalent. It’s okay in small doses, but I’m not going to choose a romantic movie or book, in general. And so many songs are about love in one way or another. Sometimes I actually do want the kind of close relationship that a romantic relationship would be, and at those times I hate having romance shoved in my face (it’s essentially like saying “Here’s how great a romantic relationship is, and almost everyone except you gets to experience it”). If I truly am aromantic, then I am actually incapable of feeling romantic love, but as long as it isn’t directed at me, it’s acceptable to me. I accept that it is a huge part of most people’s lives, and except for those times when I’m feeling down on myself for it, I’m fine with it. I’m not going to be very interested in two people kissing, but I’m also not going to go “Eww, get a room, you two, that’s so gross!” or anything like that.
However, I do have an aversion to social interaction. I think the difference is that I’m actually involved in it. I don’t care if other people want to have sex, but I would have an extremely adverse reaction if someone wanted to have sex with me. I think that’s where the difference lies for me - sex (or romance) is typically only between two people who are not me, but social interaction, I’m expected to take part in.
Just some thoughts from someone who happens to be all of the above.
It is fine.
I was just expressing about people's quick assumptions about these things.
Given that most people prefer the quickest route of conclusion which is to generalize.As if topics like these are just as less contextual as to limited to any number of media relevant references, or limited to narrower versions of spectrum.
In this case, about one's sociality.
The common misconceptions about asociality:
"From ASPD, social aversions...
The patterns are the same with 'lack of emotions', 'lack of so-called empathy', etc.
To myriads of social inabilities that resulted from sour grapes by 'burying' their envy, bitterness and hurting trauma from a form of lack with slapping 'apathy'.
The pattern is like a form of reversal;
"Disappointed idealists presenting themselves as cynics."
The latter is their reaction to circumstances, not their nature. So it tends to become a shadow.
Which can parallel with asexuality and aromanticisms.
But back to the topic:
Most people would shoot on the big pictures alright -- but bigger pictures with a lot of holes...
My own nature goes the opposite, which is typical for autistics.
I could care less in social conversations -- yet I'm not afraid nor am worried to be in or outside of it.
Nor deny that a good experience happened is a good experience cherished -- yet, I do not hunger for it.
And I still care deeply about distinctions and accuracy.
Which is, in essence from what I can observe, is an old autistic rage a systemizing inclination that plenty here could sympathize.
14 Jun 2020, 10:38 am
dragonsanddemons
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14 Jun 2020, 11:04 am
14 Jun 2020, 12:07 pm
dragonsanddemons
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14 Jun 2020, 4:43 pm
14 Jun 2020, 6:52 pm
Clearly you were destined for railroad ownership.
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14 Jun 2020, 7:24 pm
14 Jun 2020, 7:29 pm
14 Jun 2020, 7:46 pm
auntblabby
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14 Jun 2020, 8:50 pm
14 Jun 2020, 8:54 pm
dragonsanddemons
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14 Jun 2020, 8:55 pm
Oh, and now my dad tells me, for only the second time total (the first being this morning), after I’ve already used up all my “spoons” for D&D, that I absolutely must get taxes done today, and no, it absolutely cannot even wait until tomorrow when I’ve had a little rest first If it was this urgent, why didn’t you tell me a week ago or better yet, a month ago? I didn’t even know until this morning that I even had to file taxes since I’m on SSI and the total amount of other income I made last year was... let me calculate... oh, that’s right, exactly $0.00. Unless maybe I found a couple pennies on the ground and forgot about them. I guess that should at least make my taxes about as easy as taxes get, I’ll just have to answer “no” and “0.00” a bunch of times, except for the two questions that will probably ask if I receive any SSI benefits and then how much I get from that.
Last edited by dragonsanddemons on 14 Jun 2020, 10:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
14 Jun 2020, 9:14 pm
I don't have a definite amount of 'spoons'.
I don't know if today, I have 0 to -3 per hour over some constant. Or 5 to 66 that can carry over at least +20 the next day.
I don't know whenever I wake up, that carry over isn't a carried over tomorrow but spent over poor sleep.
Or that negative numbers suddenly multiplied trice and became a positive number by itself for reasons unknown.
So I have 'ranges' instead. Mine so far was -75 to +185 'spoons', averaging -3 to +17 or so a day.
That -75 was me in an intense burnout that lasted a week for me to recover.
While that +185 was the best 4-6 days in a row of my whole adult life.
14 Jun 2020, 9:39 pm
dragonsanddemons
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14 Jun 2020, 10:09 pm
14 Jun 2020, 11:08 pm
