I don't get the word pretentious

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I looked up the dictionary definition.

I still don't get how people determine what merit someone has.

It's like when people are showing off. For example, if someone uses a word people are unlikely to know, when a simpler word is available. They just want to show that they are smarter or better.

A pretentious person is one who tries to exude a superior air in general.

He/she might think he/she is a great artist--so he/she dresses up in "artsy" clothes, swishes around, treats people with disdain, and shows off his/her art even to those who have no desire to she his/her art.

Being pretentious means to try to prove something and put on heirs. Something I don't do anymore.

My experience (or understanding) of pretention is the almost indifferent showing of smug superiority, although in the case of hipsters, the active showing of smug superiority: "You mean your coffee isn't organically and ethically hand-ground in Sweden? *scoff*"

Think the stereotypical American white upper-middle class teen. That's pretentiousness.

This imagine is supposed to symbolize "pretentious."

I have often been called pretentious because I like to read and I use long explanations that no one wants to hear during conversations.

And because I eat gluten free.

I agree, I think it's an extremely over and misused word. A lot of people resort to it every time they *feel* someone's vocabulary, behaviour, appearance etc is deliberately used to make them look stupid or small.

Reverse snobbery if you want, very popular at the moment.

One of the biggest sins of our days is the (extremely subjective) perception that "you think you're better than me", for instance it's amazing how often people who make full use of their vocabulary (including some excellent writers) are accused of using "pretentious" language out of arrogance. God forbid they might actually have a real love for language with it's nuances and subtleties.

Yes, it's a pet peeve

Yep, indeed. I'm thinking of starting a secret society for people who still like to read (actual books I mean as the prat that I am, not "brain enema" material), enjoy good music, art and food and OMG even dressing in something more formal than jeans and sweats once in a while

The process of selection will be very strict of course, and the secret password "quality over quantity" as this one is always guaranteed to get me called a snob and an elitist

I hate reverse snobbery so much. I'm guessing the motto for a reverse snob is "we're all the same." They assume that just because someone is the same age, gender or grew up in the same location they must be just like them.

They assume that everyone likes to eat a lot of junk food, binge on Netflix, find sweatpants comfortable, pretend to like artsy films and enjoy clubbing and getting drunk.

Nothing wrong with those things, but a lot of people often find people more "authentic" or "human" if they have those or similar opinions. If someone prefers fruits and vegetables to mac and cheese and pizza they must be making it up to seem better than them.

To them everyone is pretending to like indie and foreign films to seem better. According to them everyone prefers to watch American movies or Netflix shows. Some people actually prefer indie and foreign films and find them more easy and entertaining to watch.

People have often said that they get more success when they tone down their online dating profile. What they mean by tone down is talking more about their love of Netflix shows than stuff that actually makes them interesting. I get that I'm coming across as snobby right now. I guess I sound like a "pretentious" snob when I type down my unfiltered thoughts. I know I'm pretty safe to type my unfiltered thoughts on this forum.

My avatar takes great offense at having his close relative being used as a poster-child for pretentiousness. He is a character of wealth and taste, I'll have you all know!...xD


I think there's an important distinction to make here. Pretentious would be, for instance, to use overly complicated vocabulary to make yourself sound smart at the expense of actually being understood. However, when explaining or discussing something that requires a high degree of accuracy, such vocabulary might be necessary, and then accusations of pretentiousness instead becomes an easy resort for people who feel they are being made to look stupid.

Richard Feynman has a funny example of the former in his book titled "Surely You’re Joking, Mr. Feynman!"

A lot of times "complicated" or "fancy" words are just the first words that pop into my head.

Yeah, same. I think many aspies have that problem, and thus run the risk of coming across as pretentious unintentionally.

It's called having a vocabulary and I've learned right here on this forum, that "it's not necessarily a bad thing" Brilliant

I've been taught Latin at a fairly early age - normal where I come from. What with me getting old and senile I forget myself and drop an expression once in a while without even realising. At work English is lingua franca (sic) and a lot of my colleagues are Anglo-Americans. Perfect recipe for a shit-storm

I think I've experienced this, or at least experienced people's attitude towards a pretentious person. Colleagues have said things to me like "you're just being smart" and making jibes that I'm very middle class (UK upper middle class) because I don't hesitate to punctuate my sentences with multisyllabic or less-used utterances, like jibe or multisyllabic.
I think I bear it quite well.

The only issues seems to be when people take issue, believing that you are being elitist. I suppose it's an issue of whether you want to dumb down and be condescending, or to not, and come off as pretentious. Such is life.

Think "elitist", someone who acts like they are entitled to everyone's respect and submission. Nothing wrong with colorful vocabulary or large amounts of knowledge about a subject.

I get what it means to be snobby or elitist. I just don't understand pretentiousness.