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DeepHour
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08 Jan 2019, 5:31 pm

I hardly visit any bars even in the UK, but in my limited experience, tipping is generally expected in restaurants, but not in pubs. The customer might say to the barperson 'Have one for yourself' or something (ie 'keep the change'), but a tip is hardly expected and I don't think any bad feeling would be generated if the customer just paid for his or her own drink. Haven't been in a pub (or restaurant) for at least 15 years though, so maybe things have changed...


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TW1ZTY
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08 Jan 2019, 6:05 pm

When it comes to restaurants my mom always tips the waiter or waitress based on their service

She used to be a waitress herself.



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09 Jan 2019, 12:58 am

Not leaving a tip isn't considered an outrage, and receiving one isn't always expected.



Biscuitman
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09 Jan 2019, 4:32 am

TW1ZTY wrote:
DeepHour wrote:
I wouldn't be able to deal with the tipping culture in American bars.

How does it compare to the UK?


from my experience it is no tips in bars/pubs even if getting food, 5-10% if eating in a restaurant but if you give nothing it won't be mentioned at all, tips are not expected, they are seen as a nice bonus.



Biscuitman
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09 Jan 2019, 4:41 am

TW1ZTY wrote:
Biscuitman wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
I hear they have a lot of pubs in the UK. Is a pub the same thing as a bar?


I am not sure if there is an official specified difference, I think most people say pub, but the words can be fairly interchangeable tbh. 'bar' feels like a modern Americanisation (though I am probably wrong there). If I had to describe a difference you could say a bar is a busy late night town/city centre type affair where it gets rammed with youngsters looking to get drunk before moving on to a nightclub whereas a pub is a quiet, friendly, cosy place (with carpet) where the locals know each other, the landlord is on good terms with the regulars and you have a sense of community there (often with a darts team, pool team, cricket team, etc).


I live in a small quiet village and we have some really great country pubs in the local area. Myself and a friend go every 2 months to a new one to have dinner and catchup. Went to one recently really close to where Kate Middleton's family live


Some bars in the US are like that too, and then you have some scary bars that are kind of dangerous to hang out in like biker bars. Those places have motorcycle gangs that often hang out in those establishments and if you cause trouble they'll hurt you or even kill you and they often do illegal activities there, we have sports bars too, and you also have strip clubs which are bars where naked ladies dance for you while you enjoy a drink.

I'm pretty sure they have strip clubs in the UK too? :P There's several here in Pensacola.


On the pub side you get lots of ones that are local, for local people. These have a certain way about them and if you are not a regular there then you are simply not welcome. It's often pubs at the heart of of poor communities that are more likely to be like this (people make snobbish jokes about pubs with flat roofs) I used to drink in one when I was a teenager and it was very much like that to outsiders, but lovely to be in as a local. There are a few notorious ones a few miles from there and I played in a pool team in my teens and went to one, during my match a bloke at the bar warned/threatened me that if I won I had better leave pretty quickly as it would get nasty in there. I pretty much sh*t my pants :lol:

and yeah we have strip clubs, quite a lot of them I think though they are often discreetly hidden away in towns. There was a brief time in the late 90's when a bar called The Honeypot became a big thing, it was a normal busy town centre bar but the bar girls were all great looking and if you gave them £5 they would remove their top for a few seconds. wtf! :lol:



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09 Jan 2019, 6:11 am

MisterSpock wrote:
Not leaving a tip isn't considered an outrage, and receiving one isn't always expected.


Cos our waitstaff are at least on minimum wage from their boss. The situation in America is ridiculous and favours young, good looking NTs over anyone else who's going to bring your stuff over.

As long as they're not rude (or giving me the kids' menu, I am fed up of that by now), they're doing a job and deserve to be paid equally and to be given gratitude in the form of 'thanks'. Manners cost nothing. But it's the boss' job to actually pay them, not the customers'.

Off topic from this but does anyone know what PG13 in America means? I thought it meant something like 12A and I've been treating it like that but got a bit paranoid I got censored yesterday (I didn't but something went weird with my game) so I'm thinking it's more like PG?



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09 Jan 2019, 6:47 am

TUF wrote:
Off topic from this but does anyone know what PG13 in America means? I thought it meant something like 12A and I've been treating it like that but got a bit paranoid I got censored yesterday (I didn't but something went weird with my game) so I'm thinking it's more like PG?


In the US "PG13" is a rating for movies. We rate movies based on their content like violence, gore, scary scenes, drug use, sex, nudity, bad language, etc and it's used to determin how old you have to be to pay to go see a movie in theaters and as a guide for parents on what movies they should let their kids watch.

G means anybody should be able to watch it

PG means "Parental Guidence" because it's a kid friendly movie but might contain some slightly offensive stuff to parents.

PG13 means it's ok for older kids like preteens and young teenagers to watch

R means "Restricted" because it has a lot mature content like heavy violence and sexual scenes and you have to be an adult to see it in theaters

N17 is for the most adult movies that young people should not be watching. It's actually VERY rare that you get a movie with this rating and I heard they don't even show them in theaters.

Not Rated of course means it hasn't been rated and may or may not be offensive to parents.



I'm sure you guys have a similar rating system in the UK?



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09 Jan 2019, 7:37 am

Yeah, we have:
UC which I rarely see these days, which means universal but aimed at little kids and most adults will find it boring
U which means universal which is for anyone
PG which is for anyone but parents (or guardians, like if the kid's being fostered or at school) have to make a decision as to whether they think the kid can handle it
12A which replaced 12. 12 is what I grew up with and easier to understand - you weren't allowed to watch it if you were 11 or under. 12A means if you're 12 + you can watch it, anyone else it's treated like PG, but the stuff that's allowed through that is more grown up than a PG movie and the movies tend to be aimed more at adults.
15 which means nobody 14 or under is allowed to watch it.
18 which means nobody 17 or under is allowed to watch it.


I think we probably have some obscure X rated movies or something but that's porn and extreme violence and doesn't get put on at regular cinemas, I'm just talking about our regular rating system + UC which I have experience with because I've got a good memory of watching nursery rhyme videos and the like when I was about 4.

This game says it allows PG13 rated content. I was slipping in some innuendo jokes. Edgy if you understood them but that would fly over the heads of kids, and I didn't think kids under 12 were using the site. I was wondering if it had censored me but this morning it seems it didn't do and there was just a bug on the site.

It got me wondering as to what the ratings actually meant.

Does that mean that if a kid wants to watch a high rated thing and they have an irresponsible parent who lets them, it's legal in America? Is that because of the first amendment? I know of parents who let their kids play 18 video games and I feel bad for the kid seeing all that violence etc. Could a kid just walk into a cinema over there and watch a movie intended for adults?

We did watch Schindler's List at school when some of us were 14 (it's a 15) but that has historical value and merit and we weren't doing it for entertainment purposes but to drive home to us what the holocaust was.

Personally, I like either psychological 15 rated horror movies or stuff that's in the U-12A ratings. The more grown up stuff which is 18+ is too gorey for me.



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09 Jan 2019, 8:36 am

I think the way it works here in regards to R rated and PG13 rated movies is that in theaters you aren't allowed to watch them if you are underage unless you have a parent with you (correct me if I'm wrong? To be honest I never went to a movie theater much as a kid).

And it's really just meant to be a guide for parents not an actual law about what kids can watch. My parents never really cared about what movies I watched or video games I played. I've been enjoying horror movies for as long as I can remember I used to rent them on VHS all the time when they took my and my sibilings out to rent videos once every couple of weeks. Also I used to love scary video games about zombies and monsters like Resident Evil and Silent Hill.

But as a kid I actually KNEW that stuff was all fake (though entertaining). It never made me want to become a violent psychopath and go around shooting up people or building bombs. Frankly I think society uses violent movies and video games as an excuse for criminal behavior that is unexcusable. Not every kid who enjoys violent or adult programs becomes a violent psychopath. :roll:



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09 Jan 2019, 9:01 am

Although to be honest I find myself hating violent stuff more and more as I get older. Now I prefer the kind of horror movies that show little to no violence like the classic B&W movies such as Nosferatu, Carnival of Souls, Night of the Living Dead (nowhere as violent as today's zombie movies), Psycho, and House on Haunted Hill. Also some classic horror movies like The Shining and Carrie had some violence but nothing super gory and those movies made you think.

Also I really hate Game of Thrones. I tried to like it but that s**t is basically torture porn. :|



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09 Jan 2019, 12:47 pm

My favourite horror stuff is either psychological horror, gothic horror or things which don't even label themselves as horror but speak to my fear of and obsession with Plato's Cave, such as Inception. When I first read the Plato (not in translation but retold as part of Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder) I broke down crying because it scared me so much, and it still does quite a bit as an adult.

I don't think violent movies can turn a child into a monster. I do think they can have impacts on certain children and frighten them too much to be healthy. I also think it depends on where their starting point is. If they're living in a world free of violence, they can probably handle it better than if it's their day to day reality.

I read things when I was about 12 which had negative impacts on what I allowed into my life. Not going into that on here because it's personal (other than to say it was canonical literature not intended to have this impact), but I think certain topics which directly impact on teens and children need to be discussed frankly with them before handing over media which would have different impacts on adults.

But I'm coming at this from the POV of not making a kid more vulnerable, rather than the POV of not making the kid into a monster. I don't think media can turn kids into monsters.

And I agree, the older I get, the more media has an impact on me. In book form, when I was about 18, my favourite writers were people like Irvine Welsh and Chuck Palahniuk. I don't feel as comfortable reading that sort of writer these days and prefer things which are less extreme. And kids seem to get younger the older I get so when I was 18 I was ok reading about violence against young teenagers, now it would be like reading about violence against any other child.

I don't know about over there, but over here and in my own experience, a lot of the parents who give their kids access to violent media are similar ones to the ones who are under protective in other areas, as well. There's always a chance of parents being overprotective, which we talk about a fair bit online etc, but I think it's a balance rather than it being good to go the other way.

One exception to this was my cousin who was allowed to watch Saw movies when she was four. She still loves gore to this day however a mixture of these and stories about world war two gave her nightmares. She had/has perfectly decent parents in other regards.



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09 Jan 2019, 1:00 pm

^ I definetly agree about the way we view young people. Like when I was a little kid I used to think being a teenager was the same as being an adult so I never felt bad whenever something bad happened to them in a horror movie. But now whenever I see a teenager or an early 20 year old character get killed I think to myself "that could have been my baby sister" or "that's somebody's child!". It makes me feel awful... in fact I can't stand seeing ANY random character get brutally killed including grown men because I think to myself "They just killed somebody's father, brother, or son!". :cry:



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09 Jan 2019, 3:52 pm

Biscuitman wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
DeepHour wrote:
I wouldn't be able to deal with the tipping culture in American bars.

How does it compare to the UK?


from my experience it is no tips in bars/pubs even if getting food, 5-10% if eating in a restaurant but if you give nothing it won't be mentioned at all, tips are not expected, they are seen as a nice bonus.

The only 'tipping' I've seen in Aus is in some cafes and pubs, where they have a money box on the counter and you can put in some money if you like.
Penalty rates have now been removed for hospitality workers so I expect the tip jars to become more common.


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TW1ZTY
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09 Jan 2019, 3:56 pm

When we go out to eat my mom leaves the waitress or waiter a tip on the table or she leaves them a little money at the counter when she pays for the food.

I think when it comes to American bars we leave tips in jars for bartenders too.



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10 Jan 2019, 3:25 am

The last place I waitressed (terrible job for Autistics) all tips, whether given to you directly or left on tables had to be

put in the till for the owner. That isn't the norm but it's not uncommon either. I was a barmaid for donkeys (much

better for us) no tips but 'get yourself one' was common, and there were a few 'keep the change' I never tip, having

done all of those jobs I know the most important thing is to be polite. Also the pay is the same as shop assistance

and factory workers.



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10 Jan 2019, 7:05 am

I worked in a restaurant when I was 18 and a pub.

The pay in the restaurant was way below the minimum wage and we were expected to make up our wages in tips. The management was horrible.

The pub was minimum wage but we did get drinks bought for us which we could have at the end of the evening. I liked the pub more because it was my local too and I knew most of the customers.

I am glad I had the brief experience of both because it opened my eyes up to the difference in how I could be treated.