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If You Had a Monkey's Paw, What Would You Wish For?

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Scipio
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30 Oct 2018, 12:49 pm

If You Had a Monkey's Paw (like in the story by Edgar Allan Poe), What Would You Wish For?



VIDEODROME
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30 Oct 2018, 1:02 pm

I wouldn't use it. I would sell it to someone for a lot of money. Preferably to some politician or someone I really don't like.

Or possibly sell it to a collector of rare items.



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30 Oct 2018, 1:09 pm

a monkey to go on the end of it


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30 Oct 2018, 1:24 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
a monkey to go on the end of it
Granted.

The rabid monkey bites you repeatedly as it tears open your throat.

(Wait ... shouldn't this go into the Corrupt A Wish thread?)



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30 Oct 2018, 2:11 pm

I read that story and saw the Simpson's Treehouse of Horror parody. Monkey paw wishes always turn out to be bad.

I wonder if you made a bad wish on it, it would turn out good? Nah. Not worth the risk.



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30 Oct 2018, 2:18 pm

You gotta remember that monkeys aren't bright enough to fully understand wishes made in any human language, even if the severed and desiccated forearm could hear...



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30 Oct 2018, 2:41 pm

My first wish would be for the thing to grant me wishes that didn't backfire. :mrgreen:



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30 Oct 2018, 2:48 pm

TW1ZTY wrote:
My first wish would be for the thing to grant me wishes that didn't backfire.
Granted.

Any wish associated with internal-combustion engines in any way is no longer granted. All other wishes are handled normally.



Scipio
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30 Oct 2018, 3:08 pm

Fnord wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
a monkey to go on the end of it
Granted.

The rabid monkey bites you repeatedly as it tears open your throat.

(Wait ... shouldn't this go into the Corrupt A Wish thread?)



That's a good point. It could turn out to be one of those doped-up 200-pound psycho monkeys with the strength of 15 adult men like the one that ripped off that woman's face years ago when she went to visit her friend who was keeping the monkey as a pet and drugging it to have sex with it or something crazy.



Scipio
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30 Oct 2018, 3:09 pm

TW1ZTY wrote:
My first wish would be for the thing to grant me wishes that didn't backfire. :mrgreen:


But then, as it is the monkey's paw and all wishes must backfire somehow, would not that wish also somehow backfire?



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30 Oct 2018, 3:12 pm

Scipio wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
My first wish would be for the thing to grant me wishes that didn't backfire. :mrgreen:


But then, as it is the monkey's paw and all wishes must backfire somehow, would not that wish also somehow backfire?

:scratch:



Scipio
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30 Oct 2018, 3:13 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
I read that story and saw the Simpson's Treehouse of Horror parody. Monkey paw wishes always turn out to be bad.

I wonder if you made a bad wish on it, it would turn out good? Nah. Not worth the risk.



You could wish for something outlandish just to see what would happen. Like "I wish that the KC and the Sunshine Band had once played a concert in the Solomon Islands back when they were still popular" or "I wish that monarchy were restored in Laos following a bloodless revolution."



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30 Oct 2018, 3:14 pm

TW1ZTY wrote:
Scipio wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
My first wish would be for the thing to grant me wishes that didn't backfire. :mrgreen:


But then, as it is the monkey's paw and all wishes must backfire somehow, would not that wish also somehow backfire?

:scratch:



The monkey paw always exacts a toll. Maybe the toll would just be unrelated to the wish in that case. Like that your other wishes don't backfire but the monkey paw just explodes and blows off your arm.



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30 Oct 2018, 3:21 pm

Scipio wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
Scipio wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
My first wish would be for the thing to grant me wishes that didn't backfire. :mrgreen:


But then, as it is the monkey's paw and all wishes must backfire somehow, would not that wish also somehow backfire?

:scratch:



The monkey paw always exacts a toll. Maybe the toll would just be unrelated to the wish in that case. Like that your other wishes don't backfire but the monkey paw just explodes and blows off your arm.


Kind of makes me think of the kirin. A mythical beast in Asian culture that grants wishes by sacrificing the blood of others.

At least that's how Pet Shop of Horrors explained it.



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30 Oct 2018, 3:35 pm

Fnord wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
a monkey to go on the end of it
Granted.

The rabid monkey bites you repeatedly as it tears open your throat.

(Wait ... shouldn't this go into the Corrupt A Wish thread?)


Suppose it's better than going in my sleep


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Scipio
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30 Oct 2018, 4:00 pm

TW1ZTY wrote:
Scipio wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
Scipio wrote:
TW1ZTY wrote:
My first wish would be for the thing to grant me wishes that didn't backfire. :mrgreen:


But then, as it is the monkey's paw and all wishes must backfire somehow, would not that wish also somehow backfire?

:scratch:



The monkey paw always exacts a toll. Maybe the toll would just be unrelated to the wish in that case. Like that your other wishes don't backfire but the monkey paw just explodes and blows off your arm.


Kind of makes me think of the kirin. A mythical beast in Asian culture that grants wishes by sacrificing the blood of others.

At least that's how Pet Shop of Horrors explained it.



Was there any specification as to how you had to get the blood? Did you have to kill someone or could you just pin prick them or steal a blood pack from the back of a blood donation van?