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Taking Learnt Empathy Too Far

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Sahn
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01 Dec 2019, 7:16 am

I've seen people who have trained as councilors using skills like active listening on old people with dementia who where perfectly capable of having quite an upbeat conversation. As a result the visit was rather flat and the coversation was somethig more iike therapy.
I've seen other people who have trained as therapists who couldn't continue working and they were at a loss without an outlet for their skills. They would steer a topic to a place where they were able to dispense their knowledge and seek out opportunities to heal people who hadn't asked for it.
Active listening works very well in some situations but its a like a tool, you keep it sharp and use it when needed but the rest of the time it stays in the tool box. Training as a therapist could be beneficial but you havevto watch out, its also a double edged sword



Sahn
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01 Dec 2019, 7:22 am

domineekee wrote:
I've seen people who have trained as councilors using skills like active listening on old people with dementia who where perfectly capable of having quite an upbeat conversation. As a result the visit was rather flat and the coversation was somethig more iike therapy.
I've seen other people who have trained as therapists who couldn't continue working and they were at a loss without an outlet for their skills. They would steer a topic to a place where they were able to dispense their knowledge and seek out opportunities to heal people who hadn't asked for it.
Active listening works very well in some situations but its a like a tool, you keep it sharp and use it when needed but the rest of the time it stays in the tool box. Training as a therapist could be beneficial but you have to watch out, its also a double edged sword



naturalplastic
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01 Dec 2019, 7:32 am

So...

you're saying that "when you have a hammer in your hand everything looks like a nail"?

And that "'active listening' is like any other tool. Folks go looking for nails to pound with it"?



Sahn
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01 Dec 2019, 8:08 am

naturalplastic wrote:
So...

you're saying that "when you have a hammer in your hand everything looks like a nail"?

And that "'active listening' is like any other tool. Folks go looking for nails to pound with it"?

Yes, you could apply it too librally. I would usually have quite fun chats wirh the elderly person with denentia. There was really no need to listen so deeply, tilting the head to express interest, soft cooing voice mirroring what they expressed etc... you could actualky have a laugh with them and I do think that training could make one blind to that and change your approach to people and even how you view them.

Its just an impression, please, if you have any insight in this go ahead.