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Aspiegaming
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24 Jul 2024, 5:53 pm

You trade a dollar for a candy bar back and forth with one other person a trillion times.

Why isn't Turkish the language of Turkeys?


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utterly absurd
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25 Jul 2024, 9:53 pm

The language of turkeys is called Gobbledygook because it consists entirely of the word gobble. The country of Turkey was named much later without approval from the turkeys, and is currently being sued by the International Association of Turkeys (or Gobgobble Gobgok gob Gobgobbledygobble) for stealing their name.

How can I grow a third arm?


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auntblabby
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26 Jul 2024, 1:36 am

try a vacuum pump.

how can i grow a fourth arm?



Edna3362
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26 Jul 2024, 4:11 am

You already have 4 arms.

5 in most males, maybe up to 6 in special cases depending on how many appendages you're born with.

Just convert your legs into arms, easy 2 new arms.



Why can't humans just evolved to move and remain on all fours like most animals do?


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PhosphorusDecree
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28 Jul 2024, 10:49 am

Humans were banned from walking on all fours after the atrocities we committed as mercenaries in the Hedgehog Wars. Strictly speaking, any baby crawling on the floor can be arrested and eaten by the Beast Police.

Why am I so tired all the time?


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Edna3362
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28 Jul 2024, 11:09 am

You're an entity animating a plastic toy without an engine and a gas tank for a body, your free trial license is about to expire and your batteries ain't batteries.

Consult your nearest 38th century mechanical surgeon for energy implants before possessing expired animated objects.



Why is this smiley; :lol: laughing and moving at all?


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Double Retired
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28 Jul 2024, 1:17 pm

It's not laughing. It has a severe case of hiccoughs...and I don't find it emotionally moving at all!

Why is the weather so warm and humid?!


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utterly absurd
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28 Jul 2024, 1:41 pm

The atmosphere is using a very old heating system and it seems to have malfunctioned. They're looking into the problem but most likely they'll have to install a new system, which will take several years.

What's the most dangerous animal and why?


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Diagnosed ASD/ADHD age 5. Finally understood that age 17.
Have very strong opinions so sorry if I offend anyone--I still respect your opinion.
Please use any pronouns you want.
Feel free to PM me--I like to talk about most things other than sports.


auntblabby
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28 Jul 2024, 2:32 pm

psychopathic humans, and that is a correct answer. saint teresa is the wrong answer.

why don't GOPers want most of us to vote?



CockneyRebel
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29 Jul 2024, 5:23 am

Because they soil themselves in their sleep.

Why do the Americans win all the gold medals?


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Aspiegaming
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29 Jul 2024, 10:19 am

Because the competition takes horse tranquilizers before every event.

Why do we all have to wear these ridiculous ties?


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I am sick, and in so being I am the healthy one.

If my darkness or eccentricness offends you, I don't really care.

I will not apologize for being me.


utterly absurd
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29 Jul 2024, 12:28 pm

To keep our necks from exploding.

My water bottle is leaking. What should I do?


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Diagnosed ASD/ADHD age 5. Finally understood that age 17.
Have very strong opinions so sorry if I offend anyone--I still respect your opinion.
Please use any pronouns you want.
Feel free to PM me--I like to talk about most things other than sports.


CockneyRebel
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29 Jul 2024, 1:07 pm

Take a hot shower

Why is Great Britain so great at sports?


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Carbonhalo
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30 Jul 2024, 5:32 pm

Because when they lose they invent two new ones?
(I'm allowed to say that... I have a British passport)


You are asked to move a pile of sand from here to over there.
What implement have you chosen?

When given this personality test I responded (a baseball bat)



utterly absurd
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30 Jul 2024, 6:52 pm

I will walk through the sand. It will all stick to me, and no matter how many showers I take, it will remain stuck to me for the rest of my life. Then I will be buried "over there", and so will the sand.

My cat has figured out how to open doors. How do I keep her from getting out?


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Diagnosed ASD/ADHD age 5. Finally understood that age 17.
Have very strong opinions so sorry if I offend anyone--I still respect your opinion.
Please use any pronouns you want.
Feel free to PM me--I like to talk about most things other than sports.


PineappleLobster
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30 Jul 2024, 7:24 pm

Block every entrance and exit with a wooden armoire. Possibly any drawers and cabinets, to be extra safe.


What adventures are to be had?


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