I hate men

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I kind of hate men too. It's hard not to when you are never going to have sex again and any guy you could get involved with is going to expect you to put out.

there are lots of asexual men right here on the forum even. not all men have sex as the primary goal, or as any goal at all. it's not fair to judge them all by the same measure.

i can see that since you are still wanting to be friends with men, and i hope you do not go the route of deciding all that men want is sex. they don't. i've been with some men with a much lower sex drive than me, nad many men do not place sex at the top of their priority list. Vince gave you some awesome advice about starting to spend time in places that are not meat markets. people don't really make friends in bars too much.

you also need to learn to establish boundaries (like HondaZx2 said). i won't lie to you - i first learned how to set boundaries only 3 years ago, after i had made many mistakes and had many questionable experiences. i learned that nobody will respect my body if i don't respect it myself. when i saw my body as a means to get attention or garner self-worth, it backfired over time and i ended up hating myself and questioning everyone's motives.

the reason why i am bringing this up is that you can change the environment where you are meeting men, but if you do not change your own perspectives on the inside it is just a matter of time before you fall back into old patterns even if no alcohol is involved. it took me a lot of therapy to learn a better path, and i am still not perfect. but im much better than i was.

be careful with topic titles like "I hate men" as it can be considered sexist. i came into the thread worried you were going to need a warning for some kind of hate-filled post. once i read your message i could see that you do not intend it that way, but i advise you to be careful.