aspie women, do you hate women in general?

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TheRani
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01 Jan 2008, 12:00 am

I don't actually hate anybody, but there are some people I can only stand in tiny doses. Most of those people are drama queens. I don't hate the people, I just hate their drama.


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Lurv
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01 Jan 2008, 8:44 pm

No, I don't. I've been bullied by other females before, but... I've been bullied by guys too, so I guess I feel more or less the same about both guys and girls. Gender isn't important, and I rarely HATE someone (though I might feel a strong dislike for some people at times).

I think I am more shy when it comes to guys, though. I might find them a bit intimidating, and I don't mean that they come off as scary/violent (though they might do that, too), but I feel nervous about aproaching them and stuff. I might feel like that with girls too, but I think it's worse with guys. I also think that I'm not close to many people who are male, I think it's mostly females I've gotten close to. So yeah, I find females less intimidating, I guess.

...Actually, I believe I've never thought about that. :?



lotus
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03 Jan 2008, 1:57 am

I get along better with guys. (And hate no one.) Looks like that may be an aspie thing? And I definitely wished I was a boy when I was a teen.



Pandora
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03 Jan 2008, 2:58 am

ecky wrote:
i don't hate women, but i find most of them extremely annoying, and sometimes infuriating. they embarrass me. although i'm heterosexual, and identify as a female, i don't identify with many females. i find most of them to be idiots.
I wouldn't go quite that far but have this general feeling of vague suspicion regarding most other females and a lot of suspicion regarding a few.


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13 Jan 2008, 5:09 pm

I loathe idle gossip, and most women love to engage in discussing other people's business. I've had a few female friends in my life, though. I just can't stand the "he said/she said" stuff.



Azharia
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13 Jan 2008, 5:20 pm

I don't hate women. I love my mom, sister, aunt and little cousins. And I have a female friend.
But without exception the rest of my friends are males. I get on better with them.
Dr Tony Attwood has some interesting theories about why female aspies get on better with men and visa versa.



mel01
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21 Jan 2008, 12:46 am

i dont hate women but most ive observed are loud and screechy and get right on my nerves.i like being a woman but cannot bring myself to do all that screechy overacting when anything nonexciting happens,i have tried and i felt physically sick because i could feel how false i was being and noone seemed to care or notice and that over the top false person just isnt me,id rather be seen as awkward or perculiar in a nice way as someone said the other day.



JoanDarris
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24 Jan 2008, 9:26 am

I would offer up that I experience women as individuals more favorably than women's culture. By women's culture I'm referring to (at least in the US) the diamond ring wearing, over-grooming, makeup-wearing-all-the-time, vacation on a cruise ship behaviours. Basically what I see as the female side of our general gross consumer culture. yuck.

When I was younger and single and working outside the home, I definitely had more male friends and preferred working with and hanging out with them. Generally less pressure to be emotive there. And yes, even though some of them would have jumped at the chance to get in my pants if I gave the slightest inclination, most of them were also looking out for me and loyal to the core and would never have taken advantage of me.

And I think that I was competitive with other young females as much as they were with me. I truly scorned women who didn't have more to offer than just how well they could put on their makeup and dress like whores and would sometimes really show my arrogance. However, I learned to not judge a book by its cover somewhere in my late 20s (I'm in my 40s now). Sometimes under that mask of makeup, you find good people who at the least are kind and helpful even when you are being a thoughtless jerk.

As a married female who's not working outside the home but am homeschooling a bright (aspie? maybe...who cares, I love em!) child, I don't have as much opportunity to hang out with men and it is not as socially acceptable now. But to my relief, the secular homeschooling community is full of independent minded people - there are also the homeschoolers parroting biblical literalist tripe and I just try to keep that at arm's length. The independent libertarian secular homeschooler types I am fairly comfortable with - for one reason or another they don't wish to institutionalize their kids in the public school system. So they probably question the so-called "socialization" that happens therein and are possibly aspies or borderlines themselves and their kids.
I think age helps too - somewhat fewer women bother with the artifice as they get older and busy with families and other responsibilities... practicality and real life win out.



whatamess
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24 Jan 2008, 10:37 pm

I have very few female friends...growing up, I did not get along with most...the women that I do get along with now, seem to be mostly different...but, I can tell you that I do NOT have a "best friend" who is a girl...but I have had many "best friends" who are men.



juliekitty
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25 Jan 2008, 2:27 am

ditto



mel01
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28 Jan 2008, 5:37 am

my best friend is a female who acts very masculine does taht count?


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abram
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03 Feb 2008, 6:09 am

i don't hate women but i don't get along with them sometimes...when there are more than 2 women together for example. i'm a girl but i still don't understand how their behaviour chanches to...god knows what. or how to talk to them



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04 Feb 2008, 4:33 am

IMHO,women are the lesser of two evils, but only just.


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Centinela
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18 Feb 2008, 10:44 pm

I don't hate women but women have always been the meanest to me. :?

I also tend to get along better with men. My interests have always been tomboyish so it just kind of worked out like that. It might have something to do with AS I guess. I've never really sat there and analyzed it.

I do have some girl friends but they are a lot like me or at least share my interests in a way. A few of them are slightly more girly and kind of taught me how to look more feminine and dress less tomboy. I'm hetero and people used to think I was a lesbian because of the way I dressed and my interests and what not. I don't get that anymore.



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20 Feb 2008, 6:39 pm

I hate Yuppies.
which is what the cliquey girls in highschool who goon to be sority girls end up being.

I like more womenly things. I'm a fabric store groupie. I find a lady who can knit well and its like most girls are with guys who play guitar.

I like to talk about feelings and am open. AS a result I don't get along with other guys much unless its one on one.

I can't stand locker room talk especailly now that I know its mostly BS.

As for wanting just one thing out of women I'm not interested in dating and the flirting stuff makes it hard for me to make new female friends. Also you cant ask a guy out to just be friends. Just doesnt happen.



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20 Feb 2008, 10:43 pm

I have consistently struggled with females. I find many of them catty, needy, dramatic, demanding, gossipy, backbiting and just plain mean. This isn't all women, and recently I have actually made some female friends. I still feel like I can't really be 100% myself around most of them, except one.


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