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Misslizard
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26 Aug 2022, 7:59 pm

I had two c-sections because my pelvis has prominent spines.I was awake for the first one and it only took about an hour.The epidural didn’t work the second time so I wasn’t awake.It took longer to recover from and you have to cough after general anesthesia or you can get pneumonia. It’s also not a good idea to watch anything funny right afterwards and laugh, it hurts!You also have to get up and walk ,doing the caesarean shuffle, all bunched over or you can get blood clots.They use staples not stitches to close you up.
It was hard to walk for a short time but healed up fine with a small scar above the hairline.Hardly noticeable.
No problems afterwards with bladder but I did develop a tiny umbilical hernia years later.I was cutting brush when it happened and bore down too hard on the loppers.Doc said it was because my abdominal muscles were weakened from being pregnant and that I could blame it on the kids.


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IsabellaLinton
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26 Aug 2022, 8:00 pm

I had 36 hours of back labour, with forceps and then a vacuum extraction.
8 lbs 8 oz baby.
Not fun at all.


I don't really remember it though.

I've broken bones before and yes it's worse than that.
I remember my blocked kidney hurting far more than anything else.
My kidney hurt so much I had a stroke from high BP.

Here's a video of forceps / vacuum:

https://www.babycenter.ca/v1022848/vacu ... irth-video



SharonB
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26 Aug 2022, 8:40 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
I would honestly like to potentially have my own kids (without using surrogates or whatever), but I find pregnancy and child birth to be really scary. I have health issues that would put me and a baby at risk for complications. I'm also a bit short + don't know if my pelvis is wide enough for that (besides for how muscle and fat are distributed I don't really have "wide" hips like other females). Sometimes I feel a little jealous(?) when people are healthy enough to safely have their own kids and experience that without a second thought.

My sister has no hips and I have average hips. Here's the thing: we both delivered early, naturally. Somehow her average-sized babies "knew" they needed to be smaller - so came sooner. Somehow my above-average-sized babies (credit to their father) "knew" they needed to be average to exit - so came sooner. In both cases our first arrived 38w or earlier and the second arrived closer to 39w. My cousin had medical issues contra-indicative for pregnancy. She took her chances (twice) and it worked out fine for her. It is scary. Although I selected a regular OBGYN and midwife for delivery, I consulted with a high-risk OBGYN (and had high-risk care with an endocrinologist until 8w). I went to pre-birthing classes, post-birthing groups and support, the whole thing. Resources help me do these things. I think an NT might say family and friends, but for me: RESOURCES. :wink:

May you find contentment and joy and resilience in whichever path you choose (given circumstances outside our control). :heart:



Sweetleaf
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26 Aug 2022, 9:08 pm

Joe90 wrote:
Most women seem to just get pregnant and give birth like it's nothing. I mean, just think how painful it can be when taking a huge dump, sometimes it hurts and you can feel your butt tearing. Now take a live creature that's twice as big as a large poop, with limbs attached too, opening up your pelvis bones (sometimes breaking it) and squeezing through a small hole that usually tears and needs stitches. Ouch!! ! ! ! Why don't other women seem as fazed by this as I am? And because I've never given birth before it's probably more painful than I can even imagine.

I wish humans laid eggs instead. Even that would be painful to squeeze out but not as big as a 9-month-old foetus.


I am terrified at the thought of pregnancy or giving birth, and don't even want kids as I would be a terrible parent. I think some women may not seem as fazed because they really want a child and are willing to endure the pain for it like a bit of mind over matter perhaps. Also, I had kind of a rough birth, my mom needed an emergency c-section which seems horrific but yet she still went on to have my three younger siblings even after that traumatic experience.

Lol it would be more convenient perhaps if humans laid eggs.


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babybird
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27 Aug 2022, 11:35 am

Joe90 wrote:
Most women seem to just get pregnant and give birth like it's nothing. I mean, just think how painful it can be when taking a huge dump, sometimes it hurts and you can feel your butt tearing. Now take a live creature that's twice as big as a large poop, with limbs attached too, opening up your pelvis bones (sometimes breaking it) and squeezing through a small hole that usually tears and needs stitches. Ouch!! ! ! ! Why don't other women seem as fazed by this as I am? And because I've never given birth before it's probably more painful than I can even imagine.

I wish humans laid eggs instead. Even that would be painful to squeeze out but not as big as a 9-month-old foetus.


It's incredible. I was still only about 7 stone at full term and really narrow hips (boyish frame) but somehow my baby came out. To be fair I think I had an easier time of it than a lot of women even though I was still quite young. I actually fell asleep during labour and just woke up in time to push.

The baby was huge in relation to how big my bump was as well. They told me that it was all baby and very little water. They had to pop my waters as well because they didn't pop on their own.


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White_Feather
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22 Sep 2022, 7:33 pm

Joe90 wrote:

I wish humans laid eggs instead. Even that would be painful to squeeze out but not as big as a 9-month-old foetus.


Me too :lol: You realize how easy it would be for people to have abortions 8O



Fireblossom
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23 Sep 2022, 10:26 am

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Sometimes I feel a little jealous(?) when people are healthy enough to safely have their own kids and experience that without a second thought.


Hundred times this! Health is a privilege that people who have it take for granted.



nisamnormalna
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07 Oct 2022, 7:46 am

As an antinatalist, I find it tragic.



League_Girl
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23 Oct 2022, 12:58 pm

Vaginas and birth canals are made to stretch when the baby comes. I didn't feel anything when my kids came out and I had a spontaneous natural childbirth. All I felt was pressure down there when my daughter was coming out and it was really uncomfortable and I didn't feel her come out when I pushed. It just felt like I was taking a giant dump and contractions felt like period pain and constipation but were ten times sharper. I only knew I was in labor because the crampings were closer together and lasting longer before stopping. Labor certainly doesn't start like that like you see on film. Pre labor starts when you feel the contractions off and on weeks or days before you give birth. For some it starts that same day before they get closer together. They started for my son the day I had him and I even went to work in pre labor and for my daughter, they started a week before I gave birth and she dropped down in my uterus while my son dropped right before I gave birth. Both my kids were born at exactly 39 weeks.


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Caz72
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23 Oct 2022, 7:10 pm

it hurt like merry hell for me when i gave birth to my son
but that might have been because i wasnt surrounded by midwives reassuring me and helping me breathe and push etc..i was alone in my kitchen

terrible experience


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calliaz
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29 Oct 2022, 8:19 pm

From what I remember, the pain doesn't really come from the "small hole" issue (it is more like a turtleneck sweater meant to stretch). The pain is from the contraction of muscles that don't usually engage in that way. I didn't have much pain because I had an epidural. The birth was hard and there were lots of traumatic things, but even now I would do it again to have my child. There are lots of things we choose to do that cause us pain (like fall in love). It's a cost/benefit thing (or some people don't have a choice with an accidental pregnancy).



MrsPeel
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30 Oct 2022, 4:05 am

My first one hurt bad - but mainly because I didn't really understand the process and was afraid. Fear ramps up pain a lot.

When the second one came around I understood better that the pain was contractions to help open up the birth canal and that the pain came in waves so you just have to (try to) relax and ride each one out. And I knew that there would be a period when it got pretty intense but then it would all be over pretty quick.

And then holding a newborn baby - a baby that you brought to life - is just the most incredible feeling.