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Sloppypoppy
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24 Feb 2024, 2:15 pm

How can I help someone with autism who locks themselves in their home and whenever people try to attempt to talk to them or ask to come in they tell them to EfF off .



bee33
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25 Feb 2024, 1:22 am

It sounds like they might be having a shutdown or meltdown. Would it be possible to talk to this person at times when they are not in this state to ask them what they need when this happens to them?



autisticelders
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25 Feb 2024, 8:21 am

write a note leaving contact info , tell them you are available if they feel like interacting. mail it to them.

Then leave it up to them. Many people simply don't want the attention and interactions with others.
If somebody persisted in chasing me, trying to get me to interact , showing up at my door uninvited, I'd likely say the same to them.


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Sloppypoppy
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25 Feb 2024, 8:31 am

It isn't possible to talk to this person at all ,they are always this way ,letters have been sent but no reply .is there a certain way of talking to them through the door that could help ? How can they be calmed down ?



autisticelders
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25 Feb 2024, 8:43 am

you can't make anybody do something they don't want to do.

They do not want to interact with you, accept that and move on.

You can only change your own behavior, you can not change somebody else's.

From here it seems as if you are hounding or harassing this individual.

Give up and move on.

If they want contact with you, they will let you know.


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Sloppypoppy
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25 Feb 2024, 8:52 am

autisticelders wrote:
you can't make anybody do something they don't want to do.

They do not want to interact with you, accept that and move on.

You can only change your own behavior, you can not change somebody else's.

From here it seems as if you are hounding or harassing this individual.

Give up and move on.

If they want contact with you, they will let you know.


Yes ,but this is becoming a safeguarding issue . Why are they so aggressive?how can we find out ?



bee33
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25 Feb 2024, 2:52 pm

It could be that it's just too much for them and they need quiet and solitude. I understand that you feel that they are in distress and that you want to help this person, but perhaps the best thing to do is to leave them be. That might be the kindest thing you can do for them. This is just a guess, of course.



autisticelders
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25 Feb 2024, 4:34 pm

if you are truly worried about their safety, you can have authorites do a "well being check" in many countries. This gets law enforcement to check and depending on what they find, the person can be helped through social service agencies, emergency care, etc. This would be if you are sincerely concerned they may be a danger to themselves or to others.


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