Are you inflexible?

Post Reply New Topic

It's nice to be valued. I think I have routines but it's hard to see what they are so perhaps pointing them out helps. But for example, if I choose to place my towel somewhere else in the morning it will take me a week or more to remember that I put it in a different place. Everything needs a place otherwise I forget where it is. I don't know how NT / Aspie that is. I don't see it as a problem, only that routines allow you to manage yourself. This may sound strange but why is this a bad thing?

Additional
I watch x-men TAS in the morning and Stargate SG1 at night. If I don't have some kind of a TV Series or seriously good book on the go (Lord of the Rings) then life seems difficult. But I like it this way.

Last edited by Adamantus on 15 Nov 2010, 7:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I thought I was flexible until it was pointed out to me that no, not so much. My girlfriend drops me off at work every day on the way to her job, and a few weeks ago one of her coworkers asked if she could carpool with us. My girlfriend liked the idea and I didn't have any concrete reason to object (her coworker is very pleasant, so it's not like I don't like being around this person) but I didn't like the idea and the change to my morning routine drove me crazy. I complained about it daily--and I didn't intend to complain about it or like that I was complaining about it; I just abhorred the change in plans that much, and I had a hard time adjusting. That was when it was pointed out to me that I'm not as flexible as I thought. And now we don't carpool with the coworker anymore.

I also have a hard time at work when last-minute meetings are called. If I know about it at least a week in advance, I'm okay. If I find out, say, Monday morning that there is a meeting Monday afternoon, I dread it all day and am pretty cranky.

Part of the reason for my reaction, at least with the carpooling, is the relative loss of control I felt over having to accommodate someone else into my morning schedule/routine. I assume inflexibility stems from generally feeling out of control of your environment or situation. I'd say it would help to warn the person ahead of time that change is coming, and also, when appropriate, ask them what would make them feel better (i.e., what could be done to alleviate feelings of anxiety that result from changes in routine). Otherwise, I wouldn't force them to be more flexible if it's not completely necessary. I mean, trying to force someone to become more flexible by changing things up for them seems like a bad idea if it's making them unhappy. Choose your battles wisely.