Found this to be very disturbing, your opinions?

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I agree. To put the blame on special needs children is nothing short of abuse. No wonder so many kids on the spectrum act up. They can sense what their parents are thinking. I was able to sense what my parents were thinking.

It seems to reflect the way that a lot of parents and most charities feel about autism.

If the author really cared, then he would provide the secret, magical information that he is selling. There is plenty of money to be made running courses or selling books by people who demonstrate a genuine understanding or genuine results.

Very true, I mean it goes without saying there might be some difficulties with autistic children that maybe a parent would not have to deal with, with a normal child. But they did choose to have a child so they should be willing to take care of that child regardless of what neurology it has not complain about how life hates them by cursing them with an abnormal child. Autism may make things more difficult for some parents....it hardly means it is correct to blame it on the child.

I thought the novel 'The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time' by Mark Haddon gave a good insight into the effect having an autistic child can have on the parents

It gives you the point of view of the main character himself - Christopher, a boy with Asperger's Syndrome and also shows the impact on his parents of having to cope with his condition

At first you think it's unfair and that his parents are exaggerating about the extent to which his condition has affected their lives and their relationship but then you have this weird realisation that perhaps you are like Christopher himself ie you aren't understanding the full picture in terms of how things really do affect others ie your own autism gives you a blind spot regarding these matters as your behaviour is normal to yourself.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Curious-Inciden ... 0099450259

"The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time is a murder mystery novel like no other. The detective, and narrator, is Christopher Boone. Christopher is fifteen and has Asperger's Syndrome. He knows a very great deal about maths and very little about human beings. He loves lists, patterns and the truth. He hates the colours yellow and brown and being touched. He has never gone further than the end of the road on his own, but when he finds a neighbour's dog murdered he sets out on a terrifying journey which will turn his whole world upside down."

I thought it was a very good book. It made me cry in one part.

Hm. So my parents split up because of me? I always thought it was because my dad used to cheat on and hit my mom.

That's not what has been said at all

But just as we aren't monsters we aren't saints either and anything that gives people problems also affects their ability to cope with things and also will impact on how they feel towards the 'source' of the problems

Uh, hello?

Sorry I'm not with you re the point you're trying to make

Are you saying that for NT parents, having an autistic child doesn't put strain on them?

I got the impression this was criticizing the advertisment, not criticizing you in real life. The blaming attitude of the guy's commercial is being held up as misleading.

The entire point is "the commercial is not real", so don't get all upset about an NT trying to milk other NT's out of money by misrepresenting those not like him. It has nothing at all to do with us or real life in general.

Money, or the love of money, has folks saying and doing odd stuff.

The only reason why our interests are labeled obsessions is because they can't see why anyone in their right mind would be interested in those things. Because they're busy occupying their entire f*****g lives with empty BS celebrity info, professional sports, and other nonsense that doesn't really mean anything. Meanwhile, people like you and I are busy studying... String theory or something.

And the thing that makes it extremely laughable is the fact that our so-called obsessions couldn't hold a candle to most NTs' number one obsession: FOOTBALL. They wanna talk about obsessions? Don't even get me f*****g started. I've never been into ANYTHING as much as NTs are into football, or sports in general.

I am saying that blaming children for their parents' divorce is usually off-base and pretty nasty, and the article, like many, is written as though autistic people can't read.

I agree but it's true that some people can't cope with some situations

blaming the child is pointless though if they can't help their own condition

I don't relate to people whose parents split up really re what they get so upset about as I don't like my Dad and if I try to
imagine how I'd have felt if he'd left I can't say I'd have been too bothered hence I don't relate to all the angst

Well it was upsetting for me because I love and care about both my parents even though they both have their flaws. Growing up I had the illusion we'd be a 'family' forever and what not. So its hard when you see two people you love arguing and fighting with each other, you worry they will split up and maybe you wont be able to see one of them as often anymore...but they assure you everyone conflicts and they would never get a divorce for our sake.........then guess what happened. And its still difficult because my parents hardly talk my moms not quite allowing my dad proper visitation of my youngest brother and there's still a bit of tension/legal drama stuff going on so its kind of hard trying to have a good relationship with both of them. It's rather complex can't really expect people who haven't dealt with that themselves to understand why it's so upsetting.


And well its not uncommon for a child to feel like it is all their fault their parents relationship didn't work out, so that is upsetting.

I think I lack the empathy to be able to relate to it all.

I'm one of the few people I know whose parents stayed together.

My Mother passed away in 2010 though and my Father is in a Care Home with Alzheimer's so it's more or less like having no parents now.

Well, in my case, my parents divorce meant I went from a nice house in a nice city and a private school where I thrived to a miserable apartment complex in a trashy town and a public school where I was mercilessly bullied. As for my actual dad, well, I was afraid of him and kind of relieved not to have him around. Everyone's experience is different though and I suppose having trouble coping with change in general would be a common thread.

If I didn't have much relationship at all with my parents or even disliked them I doubt I would care about them having divorced and hell I might even like to think I may have played a major role if that was the case(don't know as i wasn't in that position)...I think part of how one reacts to their parents splitting up or how they feel is based on their initial relationship with their parents and feelings towards them.