Thought experiment: would you mind stepping up in severity?

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Warsie
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18 Dec 2009, 3:47 am

Spokane_Girl wrote:
Well I certainly wouldn't want to have more difficulties........No I wouldn't want to go back or have more autism.


How does more autism automatically mean all the "bad" symptoms of autism automatically grow by a factor of over 9000 again?


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18 Dec 2009, 4:10 am

I don't want to move in any direction.


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18 Dec 2009, 5:51 am

Warsie wrote:
Spokane_Girl wrote:
Well I certainly wouldn't want to have more difficulties........No I wouldn't want to go back or have more autism.


How does more autism automatically mean all the "bad" symptoms of autism automatically grow by a factor of over 9000 again?



Haven't you seen severe autism? Don't tell me it's at the same level we are at.



Ambivalence
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18 Dec 2009, 6:56 am

(edit) Well that was unclear of me! I certainly wouldn't want to be more severely affected, I should have said.


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Last edited by Ambivalence on 18 Dec 2009, 7:03 am, edited 1 time in total.

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18 Dec 2009, 6:57 am

yes and no. I do change, my functional ability declines when I use it, then as a recluse I get some work done.

Socializing more is not good. It is something I can do within limits, but past those the decline comes fast.

I do like my mobility and ability, I don't fit in, but moving fast, dealing with other cultures, lightly, I get by.

Dealing with the whole slimy squriming mass of humanity does not appeal to me.

My social life is near zero, but I market on the internet, write books, invent and build things, and sometimes go out and fix machines.

School and regular jobs never worked out, but I found ways to work alone, learn, and got good at it, good is what counts. As for having friends, I don't, but I do have my work, which I notice others don't.

My traits would make me HFA, not like those social aspies.

The differance would be IQ, living in my mind is what I do, and well.

I could not take a life without content, or with a social life.



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18 Dec 2009, 7:35 am

Hi Daniel, I will answer your question. As you know, I am very happy with being AS. As that is part of the autism spectrum, I can say that I am happy with being autistic. I do not want to be NT---that is not me, nor can I relate to it. So...for your question, would I consider seeing what it is like to be more severe? (Implying that I would return back to my AS state after an experiment) Yes, I would consider it. Being as interested in autism as I am, I have wondered about the differences in mind with different parts of the spectrum. Thanks Daniel, a nice question to think about.


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18 Dec 2009, 8:57 am

I can't imagine the concrete alternatives.

I do however imagine it would mean having autistic impairments that all are within the range of severity that is typically thought to be AS, HFA or LFA. I'm sure I would mind, because by now I do not want to be right in one of these at all.


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Hector
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18 Dec 2009, 9:01 am

Yes, I would mind. I'm happy with how I am.



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18 Dec 2009, 9:08 am

no. if i was any more autistic i would not be able to live alone.
i also would not like to be less autistic because i am not sure what world i would be plunged into.
i am safe in my knowledge of myself as i am...just.



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18 Dec 2009, 12:06 pm

Spokane_Girl wrote:
Haven't you seen severe autism? Don't tell me it's at the same level we are at.


Yes I have seen "severe" autism. Even "Severe" autistics do not have all "bad" symptoms cranked up to 11.....especially given few autistics have all symptoms in the first place regardless of severity..


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18 Dec 2009, 2:14 pm

[quote="poopylungstuffing"]

If got to live in a group home, where all I did was sew sock creatures and sing and play the ukulele all day...(provided that an increase in severity would not diminish my capacity to do those things)...then maybe it would not be so bad....

Trust me, I live in a residence and it is the opposite. They do not let you focus on your obsessions, even the lower functioning clients in the more stricter residences are not allowed to either. The staff make them do other things and do anything to get them "out of their obsessions." I no longer go to a day program, but when I was there, they had a high functioning woman who just wanted to knit all day. She made these beautiful quilts and could build a huge, pretty quilt in less than an hour. Even though the program has an art center, but she was only allowed to do it for only a half hour only 1x a day. The staff wanted her to do other things,like do piecework jobs and other hobbies, and she would get so mad and frustrated. The staff had to practically restrain her. It was horrible. If she try to sit there and quilt all day, the staff would disciple her, yell at her, and they would have to remove her stuff physically. She of course decided to leave that place. I see why. So, I would never want to be more autistic or any lower functioning because no matter how fun someone might think it is to be less responsible or be allowed to do more obsessions, it is the opposite. You are forced away from it. At least being high functioning, you can avoid those forced situations, and could do you obsessions anytime you want. Yeah you may end up having to go to work or have responsibility, but at least you could d o an obsession in a free time and not get penalized for it. Free time in these places, there hardly is none. It is just about stupid programs, and even if there is free time, the staff want everyone to do something more social and less obsession. If anything, you would only get an hour for it.
Trust me, i used to have that same thinking about wanting to be lower functioning and how everyone has it better than me. But since I went back to school, and got staff off my back, I got my obsessions back, in full swing, and they even help me survive my schooling, a break that help relieve the stress. Which is why I am more happier and doing better going to school, because I have more time and freedom for the obsessions.



18 Dec 2009, 3:24 pm

Warsie wrote:
Spokane_Girl wrote:
Haven't you seen severe autism? Don't tell me it's at the same level we are at.


Yes I have seen "severe" autism. Even "Severe" autistics do not have all "bad" symptoms cranked up to 11.....especially given few autistics have all symptoms in the first place regardless of severity..



I like living on my own, being able to take care of myself and talk to people and be out on my own. I won't be able to do that if I were severely autistic. I wouldn't have been married. I might have been in a group home instead or still be with my parents.

I know one LFA online who does live on her own but I still wouldn't want to live like that. She has caregivers.



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18 Dec 2009, 3:44 pm

I would not like if my AS got worse, well not as bad as rain man anyway. I'm dysfunctional enough as it is :? even being mild doesn't come without it's troubles so being severe does not sound good at all.


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18 Dec 2009, 4:02 pm

I prefer to remain where I am, wherever that is, I am happy here as long as people don't try to suck me into their agendas. At times though, it does feel like I am on a slippery slope as far as functioning goes. Without stress, which comes from being pulled in directions I have no interest in going, I function at a level that allows me to pursue my interests, obsessions, bliss. I like this plateau I am on. It offers an endless 360 degree view. Sometimes, if I leave my little safe haven, to borrow a cup of sugar from a neighbor or something like that, I loose my footing and fall off the cliff. That hurts. I get injured. After I heal I climb back up and get re-settled. Then everything's comfy cozy again and I tell myself I can live without sugar. But sugar is sweet and sometimes I get a craving and think "This time I will be more careful and not fall into the abyss of society." You'd think I would learn, but I have the ability to block out pain and memories of pain, a kind of selective amnesia that allows me to function in spite of a nagging desire not to. It seems to me that I have a choice: to function or not to function. That is the question. And sometimes it seems there's a sign on the wall that says, "FUNCTION OR ELSE!" That scares me, so I function.

As I was writing the above paragraph it occurred to me that "The Plateau" by Nirvana was an excellent analogy for level of functioning.


The Plateau
Many a hand has scaled the grand old face of the plateau
Some belong to strangers and some to folks you know
Holy ghosts and talk show hosts are planted in the sand
To beautify the foothills and shake the many hands

There's nothing on the top but a bucket and a mop
And an illustrated book about birds
You see a lot up there but don't be scared
Who needs action when you got words

When you've finished with the mop then you can stop
And look at what you've done
The plateau's clean, no dirt to be seen
And the work it was fun

There's nothing on the top but a bucket and a mop
And an illustrated book about birds
You see a lot up there but don't be scared
Who needs action when you got words

Well the many hands began to scan around for the next plateau
Some said it was in Greenland and some say Mexico
Others decided it was nowhere except for where they stood
But those were all just guesses, wouldn't help you if they could

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7RbCyxU_Uc[/youtube]



Last edited by cosmiccat on 18 Dec 2009, 4:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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18 Dec 2009, 4:09 pm

I couldn't afford to be any more low functioning than I am already.



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18 Dec 2009, 4:24 pm

Whisper wrote:
I wouldn't be me if I was any other way, so the question seems irrational. It's the same as when people tell me I'd 'feel differently about a situation if I were born there'. If I were born somewhere else, I'd have grown up with different values, ideas and influences, and be a completely different person as a result.

So, in answer to the question, I doubt I would still be 'me' to be more severe in the first place. I would be a person who is similar to me in many respects, but more severe.

Yay, pedantry! But there is meaning in there somewhere, I promise.

now THAT is something I have pondered a great deal my entire life.. wishing I were other people and then realizing that if I were someone else, I wouldn't be me, so the wish was irrelevant. Never did figure the whole thing out, though.