Do people not believe you have AS?

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Please, give me all the info you can. I'm not diagnosed, and haven't sought a DX, but doctors who specialize in it (or dealt with people on the spectrum) have said it doesn't seem I would have it. I have several questions:

* Have you experienced this with doctors? Is denial their first line of defense to deny you getting benefits?

* For those of you with a DX, do friends/family/specialists insist you don't have it? Or have they ever invalidated you? How common is this?

* Do you ever doubt that you have it, or are ambiguous as to what traits you have?

All responses are welcome and wanted! I need perspectives, so even if you can't answer the questions, stories are welcome! Thanks to all of you!

The mental health professionals say I don't have it either, they pretty much say I just have a geeky personality. My therapist in the past said I might have mild AS, but he's taken that back, and another therapist I had asked me if I had AS first session, but then took it back because I could converse too well in their opinion.

But here are others that thought I do have it:

Guy I used to work with introduced me to the Autism Spectrum because he's on it too. I don't know what his functioning level is, but I would guess mid-level possibly because he had SEVERE social interaction problems, even a few I don't have, monotone voice, and requested sameness to the point that in the store he had to use the same cash register all the time. But who knows, maybe he's really high functioning and that would put me off the spectrum. Anyway, he at first called me "strange" and really, really couldn't figure me out for some reason. Then he came to the conclusion I was on the spectrum myself, but not as high up as he was. Unfortunately, I had a mood episode soon after that and had to quit working there.

Anyway, after I found out about it, I called some people to ask about AS. Most didn't know what in the world that was, but my best friend said "Oh no, she didn't know!" and one of my relatives said "Duh, I have it to, I just assumed you were smart enough to figure it out by now" (that relative has similar problems as me, but he like me can read facial expressions, he has social phobia to the extreme and his obsessions are cars and animals).

Then I went to a bipolar support meeting. I started talking about how I acted during my childhood and a random lady interrupted me and was like "I work with Asperger's people and can pick them out, can I ask you some questions?" So basically I got asked questions for a solid 10 minutes, but I don't know what her conclusion was.

There was this strange bar I used to go to where the kitchen staff would talk about Asperger's every single time I went there, I don't know if they thought I had it, or it was just their topic of choice

Also a few people I know online who I describe myself too think I might have it, but of course that's not as good as IRL.

Anyway today with my therapist, I'm going to get to the bottom oh why he said I don't catch social cues, is he thinking I might have it again? Who knows.

Do I doubt I have it?

Yes I do... because of the facial expressions thing and the fact I have eye contact. I have many of the other problems though, like social skills problems, meltdowns, obsessions, stimming, but well I dunno. I wish I could be evaluated, but that would cost money I don't have.

I'm not sure why people rush to be labelled as opposed to accepting themselves as individuals (or requiring others to accept them as individuals). My son was diagnosed and after many years of wondering why I always seemed to be "5 degrees off" my parents mentioned that my son was just like me when I was younger. I have vague recollecion of going to doctors when I was younger, but I was always "smart" and "would grow out of it." Over the decades, through school and social situations I've learned how to adapt somewhat, although I'm not sure there was anything to grow out of. I am me, and that's that. Frankly, I present myself as-is, and if others don't like that, well, you know.

I very much preferred it when AS people were simply considered intelligent.

Do I have it? Probably. Will I self-diagnose? No. It does me no good. I can't even get a good parking space with this so-called disability. In fact, I can't see a functional person walking around with a lable that stands to further separate and exclude. Will some bathroom psychologist tag a lable to me? I'm sure that has happened, although, as I've said, I'm me and (to quote Popeye) I yam what I yam. The only advantage I can see to this is if there is ever legislation that protects AS individuals from employment discrimination and exploitation (given Congress and politicians in general, not likely). Be politically aware. Cultivate informed decisions about political candidates, and express your advocacy through your vote.

Everybody who came I came across wouldn't believe I would have AS unless I would of told them but there was this guy that who I happened to meet on the open day at college thought that I didn't have autism at all, he thought I was hurting my own feelings and then started to explain why I couldn't be autistic.

*Autistics can't talk.
*Autistics makes these funny noises

Pretty much most things that most people would of thought about autism.

But yea, personally I was a little offended by it but couldn't say anything else, he obviously doesn't have much understanding of what it is like so I wouldn't blame him for saying that, but overall, he seemed like a cool guy.

I would normally not tell them unless it feels necessary to do so.

"Is denial their first line of defense to deny you getting benefits? "

Many with Asperger's do work.. sure they may have trouble in some kinds of work but there is often some kind they can do. Having Asperger's doesnt immediately get one granted with benefits, it all depends on exactly how bad the Asperger's is and proving that.

i have been running into the denial issue with getting my son diagnosed this year. we went through the medical community and he was diagnosed aspergers, but the school district who is responsible for providing him with benefits is creating real problems for us in regards to a diagnosis for services. everyone who works with him on a regular basis knows he is on the spectrum. his parents, his 3 teachers. he attends preschool through head start and it just so happens his classroom is in a special needs school in a different school district; they do some programs with the other classes and even the teachers in the autism classrooms think hes on the spectrum.

after his medical dx, the school psychologist and social worker both said 4 was too young for an aspergers dx. they started to do his evaluation, then stopped part way through and without even finishing the evals, they said he did not have asd. i spoke to the head of the sped department and requested they finish the evals and send me the reports. i got those a couple weeks ago, the psych who only did two short observations still says he doesnt have asd, the social worker who had parents and teachers do questionnaires says he does have asd.

anyone who watches my son should be able to see it. whether its unintentional or willful ignorance, i dont know. its not the first time ive had to fight for him to get the right care, i even had to fight for life saving surgery when he was an infant.

it comes down to whether you fit into the specifically shaped, narrowly defined box that an individual professional often has developed based on their own preconceptions of what autism should look like. they often forget the part where its a SPECTRUM.

I don't care if people don't believe me. I am diagnosed.

I never thought about it, but as with any other thing in life, some people will believe and others won't. I don't care unless it affects me somehow. For instance, if a neighbor wants to think I'm just "weird", I don't care. But if the police stop me because they think I'm driving on drugs by the way I answer a few questions, that's a problem! Therefore, I have a MedicAlert bracelet. No guarantee they'll believe that either, but I don't see how it couldn't help; at least somewhat.

Charles

my parents are the ones who don't believe i have AS

Amusingly, no one I've ever mentioned it to has ever disputed it.

If somebody knows me only online, they tend to not believe. Because in the Net world I'm other person than in real.
If somebody doesn't believe, it's their problem, not mine.